My pride exceeds my logic
Decisions made on false claims
Regretting it makes me feel sick
Jealousy snatches my reigns
And the temporary rage destroys Everything
I have built

Burnt out stump left to die
In the forest I stand alone
If I had a voice I would cry
If I felt pain I would groan
Yet I am just a tree to you
You cut me down for your view

How can I be thrown into the vast seas?
These limitless waters of freedom
No-one taught me to swim in these unknown waters
You expect me to teach myself

You guided me here to my doom
To days, weeks, months of confusion
You taught me to be aware of this barren land
Never to survive in it

Now I stand alone
Starving and on my own
The powerful sun watches me
As I start to wither and fade away

I’ll never see you again
The thought tears at me
Uncontrollable pain swells
My head is throbbing
Your face fades from my thoughts
Fading slowly
A dagger plunging to my chest
Slowly ripping into my skin
Soon you will be a distant memory
That’s what’s ******* killing me

Fists full of empty threats
He clenches
The skin around his knuckles
Tightens
Words like punches
He throws them carelessly
They don't leave bruises
But they hurt

A twisted craving for you swells in my head
The floodgate leaks and obsession fills it with dread
Drowning in my futile sorrow
Distant breaths to live for tomorrow

Prisoner to my sleep
But I’m not complaining
It’s where I get to be with you
Even if it’s just a dream
A figment of my imagination
It feels real and that’s enough for me
So sleep, keep me as your prisoner
Reality is torture these days
My reality is nothing without you

Crashing waves tumble in, I watch with anticipation
“Isn’t this view so beautiful”
I force a smile and nod my head
Whilst inside my mind laughs and screams no
Without you to share these views with, it seems futile
I can’t enjoy these feelings without you here
Then I remember, I’ve never had you by my side
We’ve never shared a laugh, a smile
A kiss
So I realise my mind is empty
The broken horse who watches stallion ride by
Yet can only relate because he too has hooves
I feel like I’m in love but how can I be
Maybe in my mind but physically
I’m a piece of paper clean paper waiting to be written on
I’m empty
These waves ride back and forth, and my mind chases them
I feel like crying because I don’t have her
I don’t know where I am
And it’s tearing me apart

I’m not the man you think I am
My feigned personality quivers
My disguise falters at your sight
My mask disolves at your stare
I’m not the man you think I am
What you see before you
Is the shallow shell I wear
To live my days
I am cruel
I am manipulative
What you think I am
That is not me

I know I’m a broken record on repeat
How do I play a tune I’ve never heard?
I’m only aware of one beat
A singular whistle, limited to one solitary bird
Scared and alone I clutch onto my only record
Its lonely luxury is what I look toward

Strangers roll and recede past
Endless queues of endless stories
My eyes address them
Hoping, wishing
That in this limitless grove of skin
Is a single friend that will disregard my sin

love jargon, i need translated
foreign language unknown to me
it's emphasis intimidating to the core
specialist terms applied to feelings
words to accompany emotions
what kind of madness is that?
sentences containing expressions
of declaring love for one another
i will have no part of it
refrain from mixing our foul words
with eternal passion and desire
those things are sacred, do not taint them

A singular pinpointed source of my happiness exists
Located past the arterial veins of a twisted jungle
Corrupted like the crevices of my polluted brain
It is there, hidden in the dark shroud provided by this dark forest,
A part of me secluded to most but open to few
Open to you
A box filled with my desires which defines me
What you do with this chest is your choice
The free will of this location determines that
Destroy or love it
The decision is yours to make
It’s inevitable but I accept my fate
I welcome this judgement with a pitiful bow

If only you knew how deep those wounds cut
You would hold back the blade you swipe with
For you know not how sharp it is
Those around you may have thicker armour
But mine is thin
And you have pierced it with that lunge

Our hands joined
Connected palm to palm
Fingers weaving in and out
Like two serpents we exchanged skin
She bit my neck
Her fangs plunging lovingly
Into my soft scales,
Our beating hearts connecting
I felt like one with her
Now I'll never see her again

These three daggers that lay before me
Their handles aimed towards my head
Tell each a different story of their belonging
The first is one that has been well maintained
At it’s slender touch, it could spill my blood
The steel is fresh and it has been cared for greatly
The second is blunt at it’s edge
And holds less of a threat than the first
It’s silver swipe has faded over time
And is now a ***** grey
The last is the worst of the three
Only the handle lays before me
A relic of former knowings
The blade has left, perhaps for someone
Whose care will exceed the previous owner

I treasured her
But treasure is no longer treasure
Once found
Once found treasure becomes nothing
Treasure holds its value
Due to its anonymity
Before that chest is opened
The possiblities inside are endless
I opened you up
And I found only endless pain

The crimson fire licks the night air
It flickers and whips out in excitement
Spitting out crackles of flame
Cradled in its fiery embrace is her
Engulfed in a pool of bloodshot blaze
It captivates my gaze as I watch intently
A picture of the girl burns violently
It fades into a black scar
Yet the memory will never burn

These thoughts attack at times like this
When I crave that tasteless kiss
And they sink back down my throat from where they came
These thoughts every time are the same
But the more these thoughts do return
I fail to ever slightly learn
That my dimmed view of me and you
Will eventually provoke a response of “Who?”
The more time I drown
In my fruitless crown
Means you are pushed away from me
And into someone else, and your face
I will never see