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 Jan 2013 Holly W
Jon Tobias
This is the year of the search party
The year we stop looking for the answers
The year our inner commotion
Winds down to a clockwork steady

The year where everything is okay
Because it is
Because you are not your lame job
And you are not your last semester
And you are not your bills piling up

You are the moment your lungs erupt
A steady stream of your own breath
Taste it like biting cold
Or cigarettes
Feel it like a mudslide on your own skin

Let it go

Let it go like the millions of choices you can make today
Let every choice you have ever made fall away
So that you may take a moment to be satisfied right now

Assume you had no other options
And because you had no other options
Where you are is where you were meant to be

This is the year made easy
The year the search party found the answers
And hand delivered you note

The year you are a nuclear reactor
Every time you stand still
Feel the hum of your breath
As it fills up your chest
And you get so hot
The snow bending your branches melts away

The year you do not still yourself because of your anchors
You still yourself to watch them fall away

This is the year you make peace with the past

Be in the moment
Make this the year of forgiveness
And the year of less stress
The year you shake hands with your vices
The year of really good ***

The year the search party stopped
And you walked away
Dropped all your gear
Because what you found was a mirror
And it felt like you saw yourself for the first time
Because you did

Because there are no answers
Because every choice you have ever made brought you here
And right here is where you were meant to be
the world fell away - poem by me

his head was pounding, feeling sick
fog like a blanket, heavy & thick
he saw a girl standing in the curve
& he tried his best to swerve
tires squealing, rubber burning
all at once the world stopped turning
she was running, she came out too fast
and it was his face that she'd see last
drunken, disoriented, completely unaware
he stumbled, slipping in the blood everywhere
and she reached for his hand, in the dark
it was so loud... the breaking of his heart
he watched her die, watched her go
he realized this was a girl he used to know
they'd hold hands down by the swings
and she would talk of such pretty things
while he drank liquor straight
and she'd always beg him to wait
sober up, before he had to drive
if he would've listened she'd be alive
but that was years ago, time slipped away
he'd never forget the way she looked that day
when she said it was over, they were through
because with him her world was too many shades of blue
and the quiet was overwhelming, the alcohol too strong
it all felt like a burden, everything seemed wrong
there were tears in her eyes
as she listened to his lies
that it wouldn't be like before
she told him she couldn't do it anymore
and they parted ways, like lovers sometimes do
each day his addiction just grew and grew
there were more drunken moments than any other
he'd leave one bar just to hit up another
she was looking for him that night, heard how far he'd gone
and all she wanted was for him to be safe, to bring him home
and there was so much that she wanted to say
but she was blinded by the lights, the world fell away
what is my will
who gave me it
if its your matrix
then its rejected
eons have failed
in enslaving it
i am free un-willing!
 Jan 2013 Holly W
Samuel
Sleep Open
 Jan 2013 Holly W
Samuel
this feels like waking up and
falling like the
       rain outside my window

where messages
    stall when they're in sight and I am
                   tortured by the unknown note

        unhinge and swing wide

  I can't sleep inside this
       distance that's between
 Dec 2012 Holly W
Taru Marcellus
Train Sets were always the coolest gift
I mean, I never got one
but that's what the movies say

now I ride trains daily
monotonous jumble of
commute.work.commute. sleep.

a ******
   brains get swallowed whole without my morning Joe
but there was a time...

...there was a time when
I rode that Polar Express to bliss
        crazed off hot chocolate
   golden ticket in hand

then
I slipped on ice caps
instead of sleeping on beaches
dreaming up Mad Hatter candy mogels

then
Tom Hank's voice was the patter of reindeer
and magic was cast by wizards
   not scientists

A White Beard
wise as Gandolf & Dumbledore
   specked with canyons of God
would laugh jolly into a nation
        into a season
   into that dusting galaxy of a child's eye

that beard
   holy and revered
would laugh humanity into a rattled world

slipping down chimneys
it would leave propaganda of hope
in the form of trainsets

No, I never got one
     but I loved that beard
        and the silver bells on its sleigh

they are voiceless now
but I keep them for their shine
I miss those days
                 ...sometimes...
I think about them on my train rides
wishing I had a different destination
 Dec 2012 Holly W
Daniel Magner
Garrison muddles in pharmaceuticals
dreaming health for long dead
friends
But he snorts away his hopes
following those white lines
down the coast

Tony jumps at riches
wants to support his poor parents
thinking money buys life
But he finds himself in ditches
after fun times that turn
into long nights

Ashley lost a father
younger than anyone should
wishing to bring back memories
But she drowns them away
in a sweet mixed drink
trying hard not to repeat

Will broke his hand
over the love of his life
so he pays for lunch in dimes
But he lives in a smoke
a slight smile of unknowing
despite being flat broke

And I...well I...
don't know who I am
I dabble in love, life, and sadness
But I always run out of time
so I got me a watch to keep track
but I forget to check it
because I want to rewind
First Draft
© Daniel Magner 2012
 Dec 2012 Holly W
Asa Barnes
Nights
 Dec 2012 Holly W
Asa Barnes
The Nights are heavy with painful thoughts.
The peace bring by the noise of the day have died out.
There is not but silence in night
Not but pain.
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