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As I'm writing this
I'm having trouble breathing
I told everyone I've moved on
But why did I still think of you
Every time I'm alone

All I ever need was you
I miss your voice
Your smile
Your awkward silence mystery
How we would actually talk to each other right now
You know ,
Don't you miss the old us ?
Once we used to stay up until 3 am
Just to talk to each other
Telling how our love is forever
I guess I was wrong
I guess I heard it wrong
I miss you

No .
I miss the old you
Then i realized that the old you
has already died
R.I.P Him

I look at you
He looks the same , like you
Then I realized he's not you
Because I know he won't leave me alone
I know he won't let me cry
Want to know why ?
Because he loves me .
Very much
But he's not you

And I need to move on .
But the memories keep tying me up
And whisper to me ' please don't forget'

You broke the promises
I never did
Still remember when you said to me ?
That
' If you promise to never fade away , i'll stay "
Who's fading now dear ?

Come on , look at my face
Look me in the eyes
Please tell me that you're happy with her
Please tell me that you love her
Please tell me that I am nothing to you
Please make me cry one more time again

So that the next time I get up
I won't be looking at you anymore
I won't be wondering whether you still love me or not
I won't let my dignity falls just because of 'Love'

Please ?
Tell me that you're happy
Tell me that you love her
Please ?

What if you like her , you love me and you need me ?
What if you love her but there's another?
What if you love her , you like me , you feel guilty ?
What if you like her , you like me , you just don't know


And that's why you broke me
And you're going to break her too
But I'm just gonna sit here and stare
For my broken heart to heal
And she needs to be broken too
Like me ...

I'm moving on .
I guess
But I still remember the smell of your perfume
Oh okay I'm moving on now
I'll move on
I will
There's no use to hope and keep staring
At the blank walls and the closed door
I'm moving on
Letting go ,
Move on .
 Oct 2013 Gwen Pimentel
R
Useless
 Oct 2013 Gwen Pimentel
R
they giggled as i cried.
it was harmless tears.
everybody thought that
i was crying due to the
fact that animals were being
mauled right in front of me.
and yes, that is half true.
but, the real reason i started having a
panic attack was because i started thinking
and thinking and remembering things.
memories were brought back and
i just couldnt help but
put my head down and cry.
he told me that it was
going to be okay because
the animal was alive.
but, he didnt know why i
was crying. he didnt know
that i was being reminded of
the mistakes ive made and
why i will never ever be good
enough.

how do i tell someone that
i feel so useless?
im not sure.
 Oct 2013 Gwen Pimentel
Katy
I'm gay
 Oct 2013 Gwen Pimentel
Katy
"You don't look gay"
"I'll never have respect for you"
"Gays go to hell"
I hear those harsh words all day
"When did you choose to be gay"
Well sir, the same day you chose to let alcohol ruin your life
****, my own sister said she's embarrassed to be related to me
She doesn't want people to know I'm her sister at school because she doesn't want me ruining her reputation
How does this all deprive from me loving someone?
I could be murdering, lying, stealing
But instead I'm in love with a girl named Kylie who makes the dead parts in me come alive
And if that leaves me with no family or friends, then one day they'll have to justify to their god why they treated me so poorly for simply loving someone
 Oct 2013 Gwen Pimentel
brooke
Pets.
 Oct 2013 Gwen Pimentel
brooke
we had childhood
names for each other
before we fell in love,
I called you Delilah but
I can never remember
what you called
me.
(c) Brooke Otto

more chunked memories.
Venture within my mind,
I challenge you.
A forest so strange, so vast, so wild, so dense.
Bear with you a cruel set of bow and arrows,
And most importantly, a shield of your faith.
Take care of your shield and do not lose it.

My forest is teeming with trees, my memories.
Some are grand and sublime.
Their branches embrace the infinite sky,
While their shadows will brighten and lighten your soul.
Some are inferior and despicable.
Their branches dangle and will ***** you in the eye
Though you will have told them hundreds of times that you do not want to see them ever again.

My forest is abounding of creatures, my thoughts.
The rabbits, deer, and monkeys gleefully dancing around are very much worth minding.
But beware of the birds! They swoop from nowhere, nowhere at all, and pester everything.
Beware of the snakes! They are delightfully shiny and smooth.
But if you play with them, they will poison you and eat you alive.
You will exist in their foul stomach until you are complete dissolved.

The core of my forest
Is a colossal mountain of questions.
It is treacherous. It is cold.
It scrapes the sky and for sure it will scrape you.
Do not climb it,
For at the top, you will find unacceptable and invalid answers.
Most of the time, no answers at all.

Conquer me, please.
Endure the precious distance and the precious pain.
But before you end your adventure,
Pray that my forest will not become a city in the future
(A city is corrupted and cluttered and detached and deranged)
And share with me a part of yourself
Because no one does.
I wrote this poem back when I was in 8th grade, I think. It's so emo and dark, I can't believe I wrote this!
 Oct 2013 Gwen Pimentel
Chérie
You were the dream, I never wanted to wake up from,
I loved having you in my life and how my life had become.
I wish you knew, how much you meant to me,
My heart and soul belonged to you, they were no longer free.
Although I knew your heart and soul would never be mine,
But if there ever was just a slight chance, I hoped God would give me a sign.
I loved having your friendship, it meant everything to me,
And I hoped that you were not sorry.
I only wished you stayed apart of my life and didn't leave,
You were the one I hoped to always trust and believe.
Honesty and loyalty were what I saw when I look into your gorgeous eyes,
There was something about you that made me feel the way I did,
I seemed to be able to say what I felt with you.
That's something I thought I'd never be able to do with anyone,
And it scared me so much, that sometimes I just wanted to run.
I feared the worst all the time, I didn't know why,
But then I did, if only I could say it was a lie.
I often wish I could be someone else, other than me,
Someone of great beauty inside and out, and not just for me to see.
there was a boy,
sitting under an apple tree
with a calculus textbook on his lap
and headphones dangling

I suppose I fell in love
with the way he nibbled on his chapped fingers
and the way he runs his hands through his messy midnight hair,
his deep sighs as he continues to rub off his mistakes on his calculus homework,
trying to figure out whether x=1 or x= -2.
And I fell in love with the way he snaps his fingers and grins and chuckles softly when victory and justice in that calculus question was prevailed.  

there was something about the way he smiled
that healed her scarred soul

there was something in him that
made the little black butterflies flutter with joy deep inside her

there was something about him
that she simply couldn't explain

something about him that she couldn't figure out, like missing puzzles

He wasn't mine, but I fell in love with him.
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