school is no longer a place of knowledge
it's a place of remembrance.
what're we supposed to learn when our goals are twisted into aspirations of what there once was.
we no longer go to school to learn because it's no longer what school is for.
it's a place where we'd just rather not fail and we're tested on what we remember from last class.
that is not an education, it's a good memory.

My dreams come
as curses.
Because in my sleep,
I'm with you.
Loving.
Touching.
Kissing you.
Then comes the hardest part;
I wake up,
Alone.
Yet still some how,
my palms are sweaty
and my heart is racing.
You leave my lips lingering for yours.
And even though you were never there.
And we will never be together.
It's your fault.
My dreams are now nightmares.

Do you
know what really a hurts?

What really kills me
on the inside?

It's you.

But it's definitely not
your fault.

You are so simple
and beautiful,
intelligent,
amazing.

So flawlessly imperfect.

And I love you.

And I hate you.

Because you could
never be bothered.

By a girl
like
me.

I have always wondered,
do leaves falling in the autumn wind love the ground or hate the trees?

Are the snow flakes on a journey to the earth, or banished from the sky?

When a tree falls down, is it kissing the cool soils around it; or sent to cause distruction?

Are my tears a sign of weakness being that I let them trickle down my skin? Or a sign of strength, showing that I have emotion?

If there's on thing I do know, which is perhaps contradictory to it's self.
But I, indeed have fallen for you.
And this, I have no idea why.

Oh but sometimes, my dear,
The monsters are not under
Our beds.
But found in the darkest part Of our hearts.
They hide in our souls,
Yearning for sadness to take over.
They can't always be fought.
And even if you try,
Sometimes we'll lose.
And if I lose you to your monsters,
I'm sure I'll lose myself too.

In my mind, my thoughts come to me like hurricanes.
With no space for an umbrella.

Though I've noticed I've been terribly drowned in my head.

Perhaps it's because if my thoughts of you were rain, my body is the earth; and you, you're a downpour.

So tragically beautiful yet torrentially devastating.

Though the impact of these thoughts never last more than a few hours.

They leave marks on my skin and engrave your name into mine.

Leaving an everlasting scar on my lips yet somehow as you rip my heart apart. You mend it just the same.

There's something about the sky before it rains.
So tranquil and silent.
As though the clouds are at peace with each other.
Happy and content.
Though it's in sync with each other.
Similar to the sun and the moon, it's often that tragedy coheres with simplicity and beauty.
In which case I don't want to be just another raindrop in your storm.

I want to be the whole **** downpour. Drowning you in every thought.
Keeping my head above water and surfacing in your mind.
I want to be your everything.
And I will be.
Once it rains.