Eliza: Favorites

Oct 2013 Eliza

Lost Love

Oct 2013 Eliza

September

"Munro, one day you're gonna hate the world"

For a reason you never told me, you always called me by my last name.
Maybe you were avoiding the same name of the girl before me
(who loved and was never loved back)
And saying it made the truth so much more real.
You're a murderer.

"And it'll all be because of me."

I'm still waiting to see if your ego was lying or not.
Poem about an unrequited love stuck in 2010.
Sick symmetry.

Oct 2013 Eliza

My feelings.

Oct 2013 Eliza

Bambi

My feelings.

I hurt myself today. To see if I still feel. I focus on the pain; the only thing thats real. ~ Nine Inch Nails
I wish that sometimes I can really show myself, without being questioned.
I want to speak my mind, without being blocked or suffocated.
What have I become. My sweetest friend. Everyone I know goes away in thee end. ~ Nine Inch Nails
I know right when I publish this my grandma will call and question, so my mom will go on unpost, leaving me raveled, taken together, question in a box. Yet again I must be questioned.
Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years, decades roll by dragging my decaying body behind it.
Im to young to drive away.
Im to afraid to run.
What will happen when I get home today?
I question myself, I order myself.
It is killing me not to speak.
Yet I must remain quiet.
I am sorry, for I must remain concealed.
You did raise me right.
You did treat me well.
Its me.
Beneath the stains of time. The feelings disappear. You were someone else I am still right here. ~ Nine Inch Nails

Oct 2013 Eliza

If You Come Softly

Oct 2013 Eliza

Audre Lorde

If You Come Softly

If you come as softly
As the wind within the trees
You may hear what I hear
See what sorrow sees.

If you come as lightly
As threading dew
I will take you gladly
Nor ask more of you.

You may sit beside me
Silent as a breath
Only those who stay dead
Shall remember death.

And if you come I will be silent
Nor speak harsh words to you.
I will not ask you why now.
Or how, or what you do.

We shall sit here, softly
Beneath two different years
And the rich between us
Shall drink our tears.

Oct 2013 Eliza

the End (10w)

Oct 2013 Eliza

Helen

the End (10w)

regardless of the emotions
we hold
The experience
replays tenfold

Oct 2013 Eliza

The Mask

Oct 2013 Eliza

n

The Mask

Hidden from true sight
The mask shields my feelings
it hides me from the light

i fear the truth underneath is to
hideous to be seen
the mask protects me from intrusion
it holds the wicked thoughts and the absolute unclean
underneath the mask i'm writhing with shame

my true identity has become lost
as i've become unfamiliar, unfriendly
even with my own name
protecting or hiding the years have
blurred the intent

i'm lost and confused all the time
the mask has taken away everything that it meant
i search for someone who would know my pain

i remove the mask for a moment
and i would feel as i found someone,
bu the flood of unclean would make
me loose that again and again

The mask returns to hold back what is deep with in
please dont look to hard
i couldn't find anymore who understood
any place to go, much to my chagrin
this is what's here, what is and you what is not
my mask is my shield
it may not be the right way to be
protected but its the only thing i've got

Oct 2013 Eliza

Invisible Friends

Oct 2013 Eliza

Higgs

Invisible Friends

Unseen personalities
Who shared my younger days.
Hated by my parents,
Who hoped it was a phase.

From first thing in the morning,
Then after school, till late,
My friends were always there for me
At ninety five point eight.

A belated tribute to Capital Radio, which reached its fortieth birthday last week. During the 70s and 80s, my sisters and I were addicted to this station. We listened to various DJs over the years but I suppose our favourite would have to be the late, great, Kenny Everett. My parents, on the other hand, were not so keen and became increasingly exasperated at having to retune the kitchen radio back to Radio 4.

http://radiotoday.co.uk/2013/10/isnt-it-good-to-know-capital-radio/

Oct 2013 Eliza

overflow.

Oct 2013 Eliza

brooke

overflow.

i am trying
too hard to
be too much

(c) Brooke Otto