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Mar 2016 · 264
isnt it strange
Creepstar Mar 2016
Isn't it strange,how after the fact so many people will say how they miss a person they they had no time for in their lifetime.

Isn't it strange how some terminal things such as marriage are celebrated but others such as alcoholism are scorned.

Isn't it strange how acts of emotion such as kindness are reward,where an equal amount of anger is abhorrent.

Isn't it strange how we can talk to a few people but a stranger is awkward.

Isn't it strange how we congratulate lives beginning but mourn the deaths.

Isn't it strange that we have a complex system of sounds to symbolise emotions we hardly understand.

Isn't it strange that we keep animals that see us as no more than squawking chimps as pets and become emotionally invested in them even though they see us as no more than food bearers.

Isn't it strange that we poison ourselves and say its fun but living healthily is seen as a chore.

Isn't it strange how much we try to connect yet still stand apart.

Life is indeed strange,and people are stranger.
Mar 2016 · 180
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
Loyalty,honesty,truth,
Are a warriors greatest tool.
The deceiptful are cowards,
And prove them self the fool.
Mar 2016 · 119
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
I'm a failure
And I lost
Mar 2016 · 179
Thoughts
Creepstar Mar 2016
Bounce,pounce, race,wild
Think,drink,smile,child
Move quick,think slow
What's this?you know
Eat,hurt,joy,pain
Grow,learn,thought,brain
Give,grace,feel,f­ree
Retract,remind, slow,me
Mar 2016 · 188
cyanide
Creepstar Mar 2016
Slip me betwixt your lips
As easily as your hips
Cyanide a couple drips
Haemoglobin a couple rips

Blood thins
Pace races
Death pins
To your faces

Easy exit,nothing more
For those who get it,here's the door
Mar 2016 · 149
death
Creepstar Mar 2016
I am death
You feel me breathing
I watch you
While you're sleeping

I have ambition
It'll consume your drive
Its my mission
To ******* you alive

I want your soul
I want your life
I'll take you whole
But you'll hold the knife
Mar 2016 · 187
i am
Creepstar Mar 2016
I am the picture of Zen
I know where I'm going
I know what I'll not do again

I am the picture of grace
Despite the erratic
I'll bare my face

I am the picture of calm
Though I'm hurt
I sound no alarm

I am the picture of apathy
Because I'll smile
While not happy

I am the picture of free
Because you won't see it
When you lose me
Creepstar Mar 2016
What god sits on your throne?
Will they save you when you're broken and alone?
Will they forgive you for things you can't atone?
Because my God produces endless love shown

His heart so big he adopted me as a child
And loves me despite being unruly and wild
He loves that I'm unique and self styled
He forgave my sin when I defiled

He believes in me even when I can't
He let's me talk to him even when its just a rant
He straightens me when my life is on a slant
He strengthens my faith when it is scant

He revealed himself to me and made me a man
Ask yourself is that something your god can?
Do you worship or are you just a fan?
When you need someone where have you ran?
Mar 2016 · 159
Hold me up
Creepstar Mar 2016
I'm done representing demons
When angels hold me up
Its not about what feeds me
Its about what keeps me standing tough

I can shut myself in darkness
Burn myself with sorrow
I'll just come full circle
When I do the same tomorrow

So I'm walking out that door
Step into the light
I am craving more
Than desperation in the night
Mar 2016 · 114
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
Subltle,smooth
Quite and sharp
Light he way
When it is dark
Mar 2016 · 141
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
Sat shaking I make the choice
I will drink,I can't function this way
Nothing I do with my voice
Could help what I have to do today

I must remain focused,calm
Keep my eye on the prize
I have no qualm
Nor will I sever ties

By my own admission
I have made a mess
It was my decision
Into eyes my fingers I do press
Mar 2016 · 172
Self realisation
Creepstar Mar 2016
Talking to myself reflection in the fridge
I can't make up for what I did
It's like blowing in the didge
Truth from myself I hid
Mar 2016 · 224
I miss you MJ
Creepstar Mar 2016
**** it ima start smoking **** again
Longing for that perfect state of zen
I need not know where I am or where I been
I like viewing life like a ******* dream

I need to calm my ******* ****
I been tearing my my mind into ******* bits
Mindview isn't well where it sits
I'm having ******* daily fits

As much as I wanna be left the **** alone
I know that I have grown
And love I should have shown
But I can be calm without the stonned

My mind is like a battle field
Who can tell what is trauma and what is real
What's the ******* deal?
I cant even enjoy a ******* meal

All I ever do is drink and sniff drugs
As if its a fine replacement for caring hugs
Run in with groups of thugs
It could be so much better with a couple nugs

Blaze some of the good stuff
Feel rough,tough and have a couple puff
To knowing its more than enough
Move on but hold on to love
Mar 2016 · 173
Forever
Creepstar Mar 2016
Break the ideal of life across my spine
Break my back and leave me a physical *******
Let my mind be,sully yourself on my physique
Just let my mind be,nothing is sacred
Its all erroneous, eroding our atomic fabric
Energy displaced,trapped in mortal phase
You live and die but once
But you stay dead **forever
Mar 2016 · 175
Losing it
Creepstar Mar 2016
It's getting to that point more & more
Where existing in this life is just a chore
I wish I could turn to my friends and not make them sore
Not die inside right to the core
Life has become day to day and what for?
The anxiety to pierce my head and bore
Like scars on my arms that for years I wore
But deep down I know I'm not free until I walk out that door
I'm losing my own personal war
Against demons that have left my mind poor
Just destruction,angst and scenes of gore
That's why I chose to put it all down in lore
Mar 2016 · 160
Humour
Creepstar Mar 2016
I bet you wish you were surrounded by all this ***** begging for your attention,writhing all over you for affection.

Clearly I mean cats.

God,I'm lonely.
Mar 2016 · 235
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
Sing the sound of the broken
Force the sound from the diaphragm
Draw out the pain from soul to paper
Lay it out as a diagram
Paint the wall with raw emotion
Create an environment if you can
Study it with close inspection
Its all part of a greater plan
Mar 2016 · 178
^_^
Creepstar Mar 2016
^_^
Having a competent conversation with nobody is a lot less fun than slurring to the cat.
If you wonder why I'm saying this,its because its basically what point I'm at.
Mar 2016 · 144
Low and lonely
Creepstar Mar 2016
Even on the joy filled days,
I can get very low and very lonely.
When my spirit breaks,friends are absent,
And I can't even talk to my one and only.

So I drink until I'm too drunk to stay awake,
The only brief reprieve I can depend on.
I wondered if I died today,
How long would it take anyone to notice I'm gone?

At least I have my alcohol,
It'll always be by my side.
And even if it kills me,
At least it gave me time for an awesome ride.
Mar 2016 · 178
pennys 3rd birthing day
Creepstar Mar 2016
My little Penny grunts
Contractions start
Prepares to bring life forth
That will steal the heart

She picks birthing partner
Her eldest son
Large black tom
The softest one

She slow blinks
To show she needs calm
Waiting by quietly
In case she raises the alarm

I hope these ones survive
Unlike the last
Here's to a better future
Leave the past in the past
Mar 2016 · 145
haiku
Creepstar Mar 2016
The wind may howl harsh
The tree does not move an inch
As its roots are strong
Mar 2016 · 284
Russian Roulette
Creepstar Mar 2016
Every morning he loads a single bullet into his revolver,
He spins the chamber and places the barrel to his skull,
Pulling the hammer back and pulling the trigger in symbiosis.
CLICK
Another day survived.
Some days he isn't so lucky.
BANG
As she fires wrath and rage,his revolver belittles his integrity,he struggles to maintain his cool and leaves.
We tell him playing Russian roulette with a loose cannon is dangerous.
He replies "I love her"
We relate to this vested interest in the notion of affection versus considerable loss of self and wish him luck.
Inspired by a friend in a tight spot.
Mar 2016 · 156
.
Creepstar Mar 2016
.
My beauty Daisy
Perfect,fair
All I ask
Is that you care
Lovers embrace
Unbroken stare
Bodies press
While we are bare
Mar 2016 · 114
she is
Creepstar Mar 2016
Such is she
The perfect creature
Down to each
Athstetic feature

Nothing she
Is made of true
Would leave the eye
Wanting more from you
Mar 2016 · 536
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
Flowers bloom
Flowers die
Some are beauty
Such as my

Sweet scented
Wild and alive
Cover pastures
It which we writhe

Gratious,fine
Soft and fair
Unlike those flowers
My daisys better bare
Mar 2016 · 198
vintage cat
Creepstar Mar 2016
My dearest sally
You scruffy ******* of fluff
Your departure will be met sadly
Know the descion was really tough
But when we see you fit
And bleed from your ears
We have to do what right
Despite the tears
Nearly twenty years
As a best friend
You were an amazing cat
Let's not pretend
I'll miss the way you would wake me
And lick my face
The way you'd purr oh so loud
And strut about and own the place
I will really miss your face
I hope your transition will be met with grace
The love you gave
For nothing In return
To going to your grave
Where you shall return
You have no idea
How much you will be missed
We will mourn for this loss
I'll carry your collar around my wrist
Mar 2016 · 199
nostalgia
Creepstar Mar 2016
Do you remember
When we first kissed
Do you remember
Copulation while we were ******

Do you remember
Soaking the couch
Do you remember
My tongue working your love pouch

*I vividly remember all of this
But my favourite is our first kiss
Mar 2016 · 206
i hope it lasts forver
Creepstar Mar 2016
One day three months

She still gives me goosebumps

To look at her my heart thumps

My friend grows when blood pumps

I lose my words and my mind skips

Hands caress her perfect hips

I love to press  my own to her lips

I even love her snail trail drips
Mar 2016 · 174
no time for weakness
Creepstar Mar 2016
Flushing hot and cold
Spewing loud and bold
But this hangover is going on hold
As my artwork needs to be sold
Mar 2016 · 200
daisy
Creepstar Mar 2016
You
Are etched on the tablet of my heart
The muse of each line of art
And there is no thing more painful than to be apart
I have loved you from the start
Mar 2016 · 152
goodbye
Creepstar Mar 2016
From youth
To grace
Lines etched in
My face
Set at
A pace
When gone
No trace
Mar 2016 · 606
expire
Creepstar Mar 2016
Everybody has an expiration date.

How will you face your fate?

Face down in a drunk state?

Heart attack while you *******?

In a fight with spouse irate?

Hit by a car while you skate?

Depressed or while you elate?

Because from death,nobody can separate.
Life is a mist
It'll be gone in moments
Mar 2016 · 342
...
Creepstar Mar 2016
...
Love is wild
Love is free
Love is what
Brought you to me

Love is kind
Love is fair
Your love is why
I can still breath air

Love is perfect
Love is pure
For the sake of love
Please don't walk out the door
Mar 2016 · 648
im fine
Creepstar Mar 2016
You cannot commit suicide
Because its not a crime
When you can no longer hide
Knowing you'll never be good enough may as well stand as a sign

Block the view of all hope
take the rope,take the rope

When you can't even talk about it

"Nobody would miss you"
Repeated like a mantra

Nobody actually cares
They just want to give out false hopes and trap you in snares
I'd rater be mauled by bears

The light of life seems nothing more than a glimmer
Coated in a shadow so dark it consumes
Relentlessly eating at happiness

"Yeah,
I can laugh
Becasuse I'm a joke
You can laugh too,
I couldn't be any more broke"

"I can sleep
But never rest
Drink myself deep
To help with pressure in the chest"

Standing in the eye of this storm
Knowing a step in any direction
Only brings me closer to death

"I'm fine,really"

Slam the door
*I won't be a burden anymore
You cannot commit suicide but you can commit to it
Mar 2016 · 299
Razorblade
Creepstar Mar 2016
Razorblade

          Serenade

                    I'm not afraid

                                No more masquerade

                                                     The darker shade

                                                                  Through hell I wade

                                                                                             Until I fade
Mar 2016 · 274
My best friend
Creepstar Mar 2016
Tiny serrated knife
Taking the stress from my life

You need no thanks for what you can do
You rip,tear and get me through

You help me cry without tears
You comfort me through all my fears

You are my best friend
Purpose pure,let's not pretend

You give me another option you know
As you move through me to and fro

Please don't ever go
In fact let's make the next one slow
Mar 2016 · 210
All youll ever want
Creepstar Mar 2016
Falling or elating
For someone else
All the time you'll spend waiting
For a reply bad for self

I want a deep conversation
And to know they're there
What is liberation?
If you can't know there's care?

They can say that they want you
As all others do
But the feeling will haunt you
Pain you'll drag yourself through

Its a lonely life
To be so deep in love
No more than strife
For the person thinking of

Yeah you can buy them flowers
Or maybe buy a ring
But if they have walls as tall as towers
It doesn't mean a thing

You'll pace and wander
In a restless state
While growing fonder
Still you have to wait

All you'll ever want
Is just to talk to them
The time they take will taunt
Like digging up a gem

Just to get a payout
Of some emotional worth
How much longer can you stay out?
Before you decide to leave this earth
Mar 2016 · 190
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
Cut out the pain
With a deep contusion
Its driving me insane
Destroy me,the final conclusion

Each slice made
With phenomenal precision
Dermal lays wade
Depth the decision

I don't mind if I pass
I want you to know
I chose a good knife not glass
Ready
          Set
               Go
Mar 2016 · 177
Cancer
Creepstar Mar 2016
Smoke lungs black
Cough up red
Buried in green
Once I'm dead
Mar 2016 · 136
I know now
Creepstar Mar 2016
If you give your soul
But get nothing in return
Then my friend a lesson learnt
From here you should discern
Mar 2016 · 151
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
I like feeling broken
Jus like a token
A **** that's stolen
Yeah
Mar 2016 · 168
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
Pared off
May as well be like your hair,scwattzkoft
Except that your a toff
And I know,that I have scoffed

Wanna get close to what you are
No matter how close,but you're so far
I'll bang a different jar
Compared to a ton of tar
Creepstar Mar 2016
...you know I lay there thinking of your ****
And you know on ****** my throat you slash
If I don't die you know I'm gonna dash

Step out the door bludgeon an **** to death
Strangle a *****,leave her short of breath
Rub my face in Luke warm breast
If she says "Thankyou" she can be my guest

I'll **** every ******* fitty I see
Gotta let that deep wound ******* be
Asking as I got a ******* hottie on me
This is how I define being free

Drown me with you ******* ***
I wanna add more of you for hours for a final sum
Until my **** is numb
And when we're done polish off the ******* ***

Bang the bottle up you ***
I knew you wernt ready *****,you chatting pure gas
An alright looking lass
But between you and the rest,time'll pass
Sorry if its a bit explicit,try not to post the deep **** but want to know your thoughts
Mar 2016 · 157
the storm of my mind
Creepstar Mar 2016
I press this imaginary gun to my temple
And pray to any gods that can hear
"Please calm the storm of my mind"
The sea I sail so violent and choppy
I could capsize at any moment
Without warning
Drowning on the thoughts
"I need air!"
That one still moment
As I breath in the water
And sink
In a sailors grave
So deep that I do not know which way is up
The darkness consuming my soul
A thousand imaginary creatures
Stripping the flesh from my bones
Just to be reanimated
Brought back from death
To suffer the same fate each day
Mar 2016 · 131
.
Creepstar Mar 2016
.
Stone my eyes red
leave my body for ash
I'm already dead
A fatal blow and dash
Mar 2016 · 144
My love
Creepstar Mar 2016
I tell myself the distance is for the best
The heavy beating burdens my chest
All the risks I had taken
Left us both so very shaken
So I will relinquish the firm grasp
Voice breaking to a rasp
When you read this my love,don't be sad
Because with time we can regain all that we once had
Mar 2016 · 256
internal monologue
Creepstar Mar 2016
Hello,feelings of fear and dread,
I'm glad you made your home inside my head.
Because I'll always fear more what you said,
Than the feroucious monsters under my bed.

You like to play with mental health,
What's that,"I should **** myself?"
"Eat all the meds on the shelf?"
"And leave the earth with silent stealth?"

I don't think it'd be too wise,
But its an option in my eyes.
After all the ******* failed trys,
The voices I have come to despise.

"Grab some rope,drink some bleach?"
Anything within my reach.
Grab a knife so blood may breach,
Parasitic mental leech.

"If I agree,no one can know!"
After all its not a show.
Mind fliters to and fro,
*"What method can I use to go?!"
Mar 2016 · 203
behind the mask
Creepstar Mar 2016
Crying only on the inside,
Is a good trick to learn.
Smiling,happy face to face,
While heart and soul doeth burn.

Pleasant verbal niceties,
"Yeah I'm fine,I'm good."
When all I really want to say,
*"Take my life,I wish you would."
Mar 2016 · 212
hush mind
Creepstar Mar 2016
Mind racing like a spinning top
It doesn't ever ******* stop
Round and round until I pop
Does anybody wanna swap?
Mar 2016 · 138
Untitled
Creepstar Mar 2016
I have
            not yet finished
But the love
                       i have is diminished
Its not
             that I'm giving up
Its that I think
                          I've had enough
Now I'll give
                        only what I get
Which is not a lot
                                on that I'll bet
I require
                what's worth fighting for
Not what leaves
                              me rotting to the core
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