Sunday Mass, I'll take a pass
and **** it up amongst the leaves.
I'll ask a fellow parishioner,
all he knows before he leaves.
Find out, "who read the gospel?"
The readings, telling right from wrong.
I'll find a worthy tale to tell,
and all the hymns and all the songs.
Those songs about salvation,
(salivating for the public house),
I'll burn a candle in my mind
then dampen it, with all my doubt.
Then I'll seek out knowledge,
someone with something real to say.
I'll wonder bout those Gospels,
and everything they fail to say.


.

Watercolor trickles in from the edges of the window,
Smudging out the clear sky.
I flee the angry bucketfuls of oily paint,
That splash and smear the smooth floor below.
Finally I can run no more,
And I am pounded into red, white and brown,
Adding to the beautiful photograph below me,
Stretching out to the horizon.

I’ve been treated like dirt,
been kicked around.
I have doubted my worth,
made not a sound.

Like an unaccounted for star,
I shone bright like the sun.
Begging for help,
I found no one.

A day came around,
when it finally hit.
I thought I had issues,
I ain’t got ****.

I’ve seen kids become killers,
and friends pop pills.
I’ve seen “freaks” that frankly,
just can’t stand still.

I’ve seen people I know,
take their own lives.
I’ve seen grown men cry,
when they lost their wives.

I can’t believe,
I was so selfish.
I thought I had issues,
I ain’t got ****.

There are people starving,
this world’s alarming,
there’s war and crippling disease.
To think for a second,
I had it worse,
was as selfish as can be.

I ain’t got ****,
compared to the kid,
who’s parented just separated.

I ain’t got ****,
compared to any person,
who’s lost a loved one.

I ain’t got ****,
I ain’t got ****.

you could drown me in
a sea of hungry sharks
or feed me to the menacing
crocs in the parks

you could smoke me like
your last cigarette
or down me like
your last alcohol bet

you could grind my bones
and play with the  shards
then mould them up again,
into clean white cards

with those white cards
you shuffle me away and tell me
"shoo"

but my heart will still,
no  matter what,
run back to you.