to me
surrender
I demand only
what you’d never give
why resist when
they’ll never
believe

My name, your favorite profanity
Drips slowly from a twisted sneer
Curling like cigarette smoke

My name, in company of praises
Will not issue from your mouth now
Delight a burned-out candle

My name, your favorite profanity
Thrown in violence, in anger
Curses all who knew us

soft rustle
kittens peer out
of cardboard nesting

crumbs fall
two old men sit
watching sparrows

soft rustle
kittens peer out
of cardboard nesting

crumbs fall
two old men sit
watching sparrows

I love to see your thoughts
spread in darkened lines across the page
take form in an abstract grace

I love to see your words appear
written in warm breath across the cold
wrapping my name in mist

I long to see the world made new
lit gloriously, reflecting in your eyes
spoken in hushed reverent tones

I love to see you sitting there
curled up with a book I found with you in mind
fixed with intent on the world inside

pale clouds of Queen Anne's lace
float breezily atop the green
like foam sits on the ocean waves
gently bobbing, they lend the air
their floral scent

A gentle hand, with reassurances
steadying the heart under a barrage
of threats, of anger
my shield against the world's waves of insatiable hate
His love
and constant kindness
deflected barbs of my fury
the icy indifference I affected after every argument

The world is full of fathers
who don't know how to love
I'm one of the lucky daughters, with sunlight
in his gaze
Pride, delight in me
and in each of my siblings.

Every time I whisper, "Dad, I miss you"
I am telling him
I learned from you, how to love
to stand my ground
that family must always come first
You taught me
laughter
joy in the simplest of things
to forgive flaws in others
and how to forgive and give of myself.

like chunks of magnetized iron
we should by conventional wisdom
attract mutually
but
I'm breathing, moving
a chunk of organic carbon
instead
of pulling extremes
into unity
I flee
and chase instead a molten core
closely resembling my own
wishing
dreaming of clouds
and flaming gases
so bright, even my subconscious rambles
lose their stench
of fear

A funny thing, the tell-tale sting
of sharp-pointed leaves in flesh
Or a small stone loose in traveller's boots
leading to grumbled curses

Holly's bare trace I easily erase
letting Time heal small red pinpricks
The pebble freed, I pick up speed
-til I catch my legs in thistle.

Wander through a dark room, groping
always thinking, always hoping
Mechanic red flash, toneless recordings

A handwritten note lies carefully folded,
can't hold it
creased to perfection, it gathers dust

No message carries your voice,
your choice
Our paths long parted, and yet
to forget
seems too painfully real a possibility

A world of treason, torture, lies
at the edge of a cliff
unburied
wrapped in
years of a loving,
a wordless deceit

shapeless
on fire from
the first
brings with it
shame,
and knowing defeat.

your love is a lie, a lie
your love is a beautiful lie
you smile with your eyes, your eyes
your smile brings light to our eyes

nothing but a promise whispered
made in the night, forgotten by morning
is my grief to you so sweet, my dear
that you left me quietly to weep ?

your love was my light, my light
your love filled my very soul
your heart is guided by your eyes, your eyes

why then, do your wanderings surprise ?


your love was my light, my light
your love filled my very soul

But now the hour grows late, my dear,
and I can not wait for you more.

You're not a consolation prize, he told me. You're better than that.
And that's the reason he threw me away.

Not worth the wait - promises of fidelity always run on empty;
not even fumes can keep a cracked shell alive
I'm not a jealous love,  but getting kicked
is something even a dog won't accept,
not for long.
Why, then, do I ?