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 Dec 2013 Cadence Musick
C E Ford
You've become the vine
that creeps
up
the side
of my brick encased dwelling,
breaching every
crack
and
imperfection
you've stumbled across,
managed to conceal them,
and make them presentable.

You've overtaken an entire wall;
teal
and lavender
petals,
like crayon shavings,
scattered
against their dark background,
bringing with them
the color
my house
so desperately needed.

Now,
when friends and onlookers
pass by,
they see this great green and brick
marvel,
covered in leaves,
and petals,
and vines
that stretch from every awning,
down to the cement blocks
of the basement.
We have all the neighbors
whispering about
how your greens
compliment my reds
and how bright your flowers
bloom,
even on the grayest
of mornings,
so that everyone
is in envy
of what they see.
 Dec 2013 Cadence Musick
Sub Rosa
When my skin splits in two
I finally feel whole.
are you what.
((i think you are)?



             the body).


i think
you are
(which is
just slightly rotund

just

easily weak.

fit betweeen
your years)

long and
barely skinny

of arms. O

and you are

what
(i think)
you are?what?

(you are the rushing
keenly that joins
vein and soul; singing
)
You are.
and what
you are

is

vertically serene wonderfully pleasant

falling.
one, two, three, four
you each got
nothing.
deserved
nothing.
because i was an empty body
trying to find peace
with no one
but myself.
one, two, three, four
there was nothing to do
but be there
until i couldn't be
anymore
one:
you saved me
you truly did
you were what i needed
at the time
but you are not
what i need
now
two:
i think of you
and it almost
makes me
***
almost.
three:
you never knew me
you never tried to.
what else is there to say?
four:
you are a liar
and will remain so
until someone
beats you
at your own game
one, two, three, four
the could've beens
the might've beens
the never-will-bes
and I am okay with that
most of the time.
in a field of green
the bonfire burns bright
there are people everywhere
and your eyes see only me
friends gather 'round
the beer is getting warm
and i am beautiful
when i am in your arms
 Dec 2013 Cadence Musick
Shang
this day was not like any other.
hot air from her lungs
swirled steam in the death
of November.

I felt trust for the first time.
I trusted her to leave.

I crack a corny joke out of sheer anxiety,
I say: "Well, it is the fall."

She doesn't smile, or speak, of course.

She does the talking with her eyes,
and all I hear is goodbye.
(C) Shang
 Dec 2013 Cadence Musick
Shang
we lie, tangled.
her body and mine.
motionless, fingertips
to skin.

the voice inside my head
no longer speaks

weary of missing just one word.
or worse, breaking the silence.

it's truly perfect.

flashback

she called for the first time in a few months.

"Hi." She said.
"Hey, what's up?" I ask.
"Just got off work, wanna come over?"
"Sure."

flash-forward

she knew exactly what I would say
and it always ends the same.

the thought of her, replacing what
some call sleep, had almost rested.
now, here i am.. too late or too
early into the morning,
thinking of her and writing
to ease my trembling hand.
(C) Shang
this dense and mysterious air
that drips from my ceiling tiles like
molasses
and sweetly tempts me to drown in it

it doesn't promise me escape from you
from anything
it only beacons me with its uncertainty
the beautiful naivety of uncertainty
that you took from me

with you there is no mystery
no hot cool clarity

it drips down my walls and suspends
just above my body
it seeps into my sheets
and makes a mess of me
of me
you make
a mess of me
and now I'm back to this
the hot cool bliss
the movement slows of the molasses

just as my escape from you is most dire
the dripping movement seems to tire
tire
tire
tire
sweet sweet sleep
I'll deal with you tomorrow
We spend all our time being jealous
For things that are not really ours
We beg for another perspective
To guide us without leaving scars
But we are the slaves and the martyrs
The ones who will never obtain
A simple oblivion ending
The heightening level of pain
And this be our chosen confession
The one we have kept on our tongues
"I want to be everyone else's"
*"I want to collapse my own lungs"
Breathe in deep, you're still here.
I haven't gone beyond the skin
Beyond the bones I've settled in
And when I stir within myself
I search for what can make me well

The water's gone and so I thirst
My state of mind is getting worse
Fatigue has plagued my body full
A weariness I never knew

I want to say a lot of things
Before my voice no longer sings
I move again, my lips in queue
The notes are gone and I am too
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