It took me seven years
to realise
the words in my mind
were too deep for
my mouth to dig up
I thought it was easier
to open my skin
and let the truth
pour down my arms

It took me seven years
to realise
nobody should be allowed
to touch parts
of your home
or hold pieces  
of your heart
that you don't yet understand

It took me seven years
to realise
I will wear these scars
forever
I'll carry them
through every smile
every kiss
every concerned gaze
I'll carry them
to my grave

It took me seven years
to realise
the pain carved
into the walls
of my castle
etchings of
attempting to disappear
are not a story of weakness
but a tale of
how I survived

She took in a deep breath
of the almost wintry autumn air
a rush of cold wind filled her lungs
and made her feel more alive
than she had felt in weeks

refreshing oxygen mixed in with the
poisonous smoke of her
lipstick stained cigarette

she walked down
the midnight moon lit road

her eyes pulled up towards
the night sky
innocent of all light pollution
and she gazed at the stars

they were so clear that night

she took a long steady puff
exhaled
and watched the smoke dissolve
into Orion's Belt

with one more toxic drag
she threw out her cigarette

she looked down at her small dog
and smiled

she deserves a longer walk
she thought

and I deserve another cigarette