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As I walk from my stage
my smiles diminish
I can feel my face settling
into a grimace
I've been clenching my teeth
because it hurts just to fake it
but without that sweet mask
I am nothing
I'm naked
Maybe we’re not close
and though the timing isn’t right,
I️ desperately hope
at least
you think of me tonight.
Is it raining where you are?
Can you see the full moon?
Exactly how many miles
are between me and you?
Can you smell the salty ocean?
Can you feel this autumn breeze?
Do you feel as sad as I️ do
on such rainy nights as these?
A building doesn't care
Whom it crushes when it dies,
And I can tell you feel the same
When I look into your eyes.
You're a tumbling tower, baby.
A fortress falling down.
So I hope you can forgive me
If I cannot stick around.
You were everything I wanted,
You were all that, much, and more.
You once had been so sturdy,
So giving, and secure.
But now that you're collapsing,
And do not seek rescue,
I have to leave or you'll believe that
You can crush me too
I’m in a weird place right now [mentally, not physically].

Last night, I had the most horrible dreams. Things that really just hit me emotionally and mentally. And normally when that happens, all I want to do is wake up and forget everything in those dreams by doing so. And I usually do wake myself up, even if it’s subconsciously. But this time, whenever I felt my consciousness beginning to stir and realized that I was only dreaming and would wake up soon, I buried that thought and stayed asleep. I WANTED to suffer through those terrible nightmares. So I slept all day. And when I finally woke up, I realized what I was doing. And it completely baffled me. So I thought about it and then all at once, the answer came to me. It’s scary to think, but I’ve realized that I really do not want to live anymore.

I’d rather stay asleep and suffer through my innermost horrors coming to haunt me rather than wake up and face another day of this endless reality. And this really bothers me. Now, don’t get the wrong idea, I’m not suicidal or anything. I don’t think I would ever **** myself. I’m way too afraid to do that. I’m just saying that if Death was to come to me and give me the choice to take his bony hand and go peacefully with him, or continue on living in this waking nightmare, I am more than positive I would grab his outstretched hand and disappear with him.

And that’s why I’m in a weird place right now [mentally].
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways,
In only overused clichés.
A little bird told me to go with my gut and
Tell you that you are as cute as a button.
We're as alike as two peas in a pod.
When you walk in a room, you're the belle of the ball.
They say that we are just star-crossed lovers
But you should never judge a book by its cover.
Roses are red, and violets are blue.
Old flames cannot hold a candle to you.
You always take my breath away.
So shall I compare thee to a summers day?
I may be biting off more than I can chew,
But the bottom line is I love you.
This was just a fun little poem that I decided to write for the heck of it. Definitely not my usual style, but I think it's super cute and it was really fun to come up with!
She took in a deep breath
of the almost wintry autumn air
a rush of cold wind filled her lungs
and made her feel more alive
than she had felt in weeks

refreshing oxygen mixed in with the
poisonous smoke of her
lipstick stained cigarette

she walked down
the midnight moon lit road

her eyes pulled up towards
the night sky
innocent of all light pollution
and she gazed at the stars

they were so clear that night

she took a long steady puff
and watched the smoke dissolve
into Orion's Belt

with one more toxic drag
she threw out her cigarette

she looked down at her small dog
and smiled

she deserves a longer walk
she thought

and I deserve another cigarette
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