drifting alone
through this desert
through these solitary sands
isolated
and deserted
the desert fox
without thought or reason
without cause or purpose
this old heart
these young hands
this love I have to give
but no you to give it to
I am wasted without you
my life is shattered
my dreams are lost
where are you?
if not here?
where are you
when I am without you?
I am withering without you
abandoned here
in this barren wasteland
like a flower in the desert
without hope
without water
without love
won’t you free me from this heat?
this unbearable sunlight
too harsh for my eyes
the truth is just so bright sometimes
I do not wish to see myself
not like this
lost like this
but there is no cure
for all that ails me
only time they say
can heal these wounds
that sorry old adage
so I sit and wait
for something else to happen
and I say
**** me or set me free
twisting these sad young hands
as my old heart melts
in the memory of you

She is an atlas
her eyes deepest
and darkest Africa

Unfolded I hold her
tracing the source
of her diamonds and gold

In search of the motherload.

The shackles of your evil never let me breathe

And so I drowned, I didn't fight the fire, because that very same pain was my pleasure
It was you

Nothing seemed more comforting than the horror you brought me and nothing could bring me back from the fire that burned inside me but your drunk arms
And those very same arms that held me, hurt me
And those very same lips that caressed me, spoke to me in different tongues
And we were in ruins and disastrous, ***** and tainted by the lies our bodies whispered

And there was something you did to me, and now I'm looking for the pieces you ruined to fit again
Because the worst thing I ever did was let you come in and sloppily hide in my heart

And there's times like these I think of you, and of the girl I was then and it amazes me that I once thought the devil was an angel
I once thought you were my savior when all you did was condemn me to this small hell

And even with you completely banned from my soul
You still linger
You still punish my heart from being pure
And know that I will never forget what you did
But the worst part of it all
Is now my future won't either