some say drowning
feels oddly peaceful
after all the thrashing

the moment you know
your lungs
wont taste oxygen again
and you give your body over
to the water

i think you and i
are past the thrashing

all that's left to do
in wait of the next time
my stitches pop and are undone
is patch me up pretty with
embroidered flowers

11.07.21

my darkest desires take point
but my will to live is often spoilt
these savage opposites are joint
never a winner or loser to appoint
a path set from birth you did anoint
i'm always dying to disappoint

11.07.21

i'm tired of the skin
on my face, parched,
because there is more
salt than moisturizer

i'm tired of sitting up in bed
to catch my heaving breath
then flipping over my pillow
before i can lay down again

i'm tired of choosing
between soaking the
backs of my hands and
dry-staining my cheeks

07.07.21