He was sitting in a burgundy chair, a glass of whiskey in his hand
slowly taking a sip, eyes fixated on the display in front of him
A young girl
tall, thin, brunette
Standing in a slinky dress and too-high heels
misplaced in his garish living room
Another gulp of whiskey
He knew he needed to slow down
The edges of his vision were blurring, and he didn't want to miss this
It wasn't the first, not even close
But this one was different
Something in her eyes... he couldn't look away
He shook the wandering thoughts out of his head,
not allowing his sight to falter
She stared back, not a bit of fear painted on her face
She grabbed one strap between her thumb and index finger
delicately pushing it off her shoulder
She briefly looked in the full length mirror to her left
before smoothly lifting the dress over her head
and casually draping it on a chair behind her
She tipped forward and rolled down her stockings
remarkably steady in her stilettos
She did it with grace
but with a fire blazing behind her thick lashes
He leaned back, wishing he had another ice cube for his drink
but not daring to move
She reached both hands behind her back
pushing out her chest
Thin fingers effortlessly found the clasp
and released her *******
She let her bra fall, not wasting the time
to place it with her dress
She stood, relishing in her liberation
brushing a strand of dark hair behind her shoulder
Her ******* were small but firm
sitting high and round on her chest
Her confidence condensed on her skin
and evaporated as he took a sharp inhale
He stared
and she stared back
Her fingers found the waist of her thong
slipping it off
Poised, she allowed the room and her spectator
to soak in the sight
of her fully exposed body
He sat, numb to her naked figure
and she, to his unwavering gaze
They remained like that
burning holes into each other's skin
savoring the divergence
He absorbed himself in liquor
and women
but he wasn't looking for ***
And she, she undressed herself
in front of men she didn't know
but she didn't want their money
She stood, tensing
and he gripped his glass
both hardened to the outside world
finding an escape in drugs,
each of a different kind
He finished his whiskey and blinked
She slowly collected her clothes
not bothering to put them back on
She grabbed her coat and let herself out
neither one saying a word
He sat, motionless
with the image of her etched
on the space behind his eyes
Just another scar
to become numb to

Jewels
Just joking
the jankiest of jaunts
Juxtaposing justice
Jails and
Jealousy
A jingling jackpot
Joyfully
Jostling
Jawboned jewels

She walks on water as the stars reflect
their shining brightness only lightening
her paradisiacal face and unclothed body
beauty may have it's layers, hers always
more than skin deep in the selfless benevolence she
gives forth in every interaction she herself
engages herself within,

In my years of wandering, I have never found
a soul I feel so compelled toward, frightening even
myself with my augmenting attachment and need
to hear her voice, feel her soul, listen to her heartbeat
to see her smile, and know her stories and tales from
the days that passed between the time we last spoke
my heart skipping beats,

An internal battle brings forth, an ever forging narrative
of realistic practicalities and the contrasting drifting
dream lands, entwined with fantasy and longing,
fears and hearts, left on the line, of a blurring demise
restore my heart, set me free, allow me to love,
let me
be
hers.

© Sia Jane
---

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

“Music takes us out of the actual and whispers to us dim secrets that startle our wonder as to who we are, and for what, whence, and whereto.”

The witching hours between
Onyx nightmares - and dreams that sparkle at first light
Find me catatonic amongst my secrets and inuendos
Ragged shell
an insinuation of skeletal existence locked
Emotional rigor mortis
Hushed, suspended and supine
Stasis waits, hesitating
For the thrumming drums of life
a message of motion
sensual resurrection
That whispered music
melodic song my confidant
The rush of blood
This exhalation across lifeless lips
Speaks nothing into the void
So I do not breathe
In my skin that crawls beyond darkness
Recoiling from oblivion
I thought you loved me
Yet you are without utterance
And my heart breaks straining
For a note of music
and the silence ringing in my ears
A regretful requiem
Careless undertones
mimic this rumor of survival
Suspended I am
Unsung
TBoehm 022008

© 2008 TL Boehm

Afternoons that were once body clock mornings turned to early mornings
which became sweet evening bath time odes to rest;
they’re tests we all win at because the prize is quietness,
primary-school-hands-on-heads quietness,
so still it hurts to sleep because
comfort has wrapped every bone in
ill fitting armour making it, once moved,
difficult to find that point of paralysis once again.

Piano-flat black rooms are lit
by dark midnight suns, the bulbs
burning through, the taps in their place,
chairs thrown under tables away from the morning queue
yet to form for the day.

“Do you think she feels it?
The names we call her
Of course not, why would she
She’s nothing
A nobody
She is nothing
Dead”

But I do
I do feel it
I have the scars to prove it
Everything every one of you has ever said to me
Scared into my wrist
But you don’t care  
Why would you
I am nothing
Just like you said

A worthless girl
Drowning in her pain
Pain that she has carried for too long
But you don’t care
You don’t care that you’re the reason she keeps the razor
For her worst days
When no one listens
When she’s done saying that stupid saying
Those two words
Stay Strong

But the thing is
How can she
How can she stay strong, when she’s B R O K E N
And she can’t be put back together
It’s too late for that
You can’t take it back
Everything you said
You caused this
You’re the reason she’s this way
But you don’t care
It’s “not you’re problem”
Not your fault

So you let it all happen
You watch as her world falls apart for the last time
And you don’t care

But before you know it it’s over
The problem is “Solved”
With a handful of pills
Its over
Like that

And then it hits you
Maybe you should’ve done something
Said something
But you didn't
And now you get to live in regret
Because it’s over

But she was nothing
A no one
A worthless girl
In pain
But it’s all over now
The torture has subsided
And now she’s just another girl
A statistic of how many people “Don’t care”
Because she’s gone

And you did it
And you can sit for the rest of your life
Knowing you killed her
You pushed her over the edge
You can sit, in your guilt and regret
Knowing you’re the reason
She’s dead.

I am a ambitious caramel woman
I read spirits and dip lies, I am always on alert, my love is deep my love is sweet, my love is ******* I always show my all, the full blown me
And that is something I will always make sure that you see, I deserve all  respect because I am not just pure, beautiful skin I am of good wealth ,flaws, and honest lips
Spiritually humbled by grandmas touch ,lead on a path by grace and faith