my eyes adjusted to the dark last night
of the light that fades in, flickering
in the bathroom where i have spent my worst times
i saw disappointment in the mirror again
maybe someday i will learn moderation
and stop desperately trying to reach
the bottoms of cups and plates
maybe i will stop wanting to forget
someday,
maybe i will stop having to trace outlines
in the mirror of what i want to see
changing the shape of my jaw
parting my hair differently

half-drim drunk lights
in a half-remembered drunk night
there is always a purpose that i am forgetting
a reason why i need to keep my cup empty
i want to know every moment i spend with you
instead of missing out on myself