You can't hate someone
just because
you can't have them.*

-Adele

11/3/14

it was in the year 1901
when I stopped at Gustav's
from the raging storm
in the street of Paris
i looked up in the morning sky
blocked by the unfinished building
stood long and tall
in the same spot where
we used to lie under the shade
of a sycamore tree
oh im drifting since you walked away
the sound of rain
and the silent pain
im waiting for a clear day
to take my baggage for the next train

I woke up

with thousand thoughts
sailing in the sea

only to find out

every piece is 'you'.

The deafening of silence
The apperception of my brain
It is just seem to wander
Because here I am trying to wonder
The feelings that I thought were gone from what I ponder.
In a glance... it's coming!
Everything's rushing!
Endeavoring to shut my mind,
wanting to stop the hunting of what was elapsed.

What I want is, to doze off and escape from this 3am thoughts.*

-A

8/9/14

long lost years
our master, Shakespeare
traveled to London for four days
no shillings or good garments in his bag

he stayed in lodge inns
penny a night
he had to gave up with a sigh

the smell of midden-heaped lanes
from the slum tenements
he had to bare for nights

he held both jobs
holding patron's horses
or prompter's attendant

and as destined to be a playwright,
his plays express aspects of life that transcend time
he wrote to be remarkable
and to put food on the table

illuminating human experience
a genius mind...

a playwright, poet and actor
that we will always admire.

A-little kid once dream,
C-reating that dream wasn't easy
R-ight from the very start, he always wanted to be someone that he wants
O-ver the years, he grew up with determination
S-earching for the world where he truly belongs
T-omorrow might be the day’, he thought.
I-nside, he can feel the power of reaching that dream
C-reativity is what he has, but it wasn’t enough.

That dream, will never stop him, for he knows he can try again tomorrow.

If it won’t work out, there’s always another ‘tomorrow’, so he decided to just keep going.

a shot of dart made my bleeding heart into art

How could I be so selfish
When I thought I wasn’t that strong
I was trying to hold on
When there’s nothing to hold

I didn’t look around and see how messy
Life is already
Not just to me but to everybody

How could I be this blind
When everything’s so wrong
I was sinking in my own
With this stories untold

But as the burden you carry, unfold
How selfish am I
grieving on my own

Let me carry that burden
For you were never alone
I’ll be here when you need me
Trust me, I’ll never go

I will always be your friend

I promise that

Until the end :]

I'm trying to climb your ribs,
to find a place in your heart
when I reached the top,
there's no more space left for me
I tried to hold on, but I fell down
No, you didn't even catch me
So now, I'm just half of a whole </3

"a pocket full of shells" is playing on my mind
under the scorching tender heat
on a white villa with a panoramic view of a sapphire blanket covering the entirety of the world

the sound of vigorous wind whispered to come and dance as he blew mini waves on the shore, they didn't stop dancing,
so does the trees and the birds that sing along
from afar the mountains are silhouette

these nature, whispered a secret at each other
a conundrum, only they- can understand
and humans trying to search for answer
that seas, mountains, the skies
become majestic to everyone's eyes,

but we only come and watch them for a while,
ponder an ethereal thoughts
in some way,
we find ourselves
there's something about them and they won't tell.
they'll keep calling for you to come,

but you still ponder.

He sang the echo of life
for fishes that blow bubbles
or whales that wave their tails
he breathes the salty air
and touch the sun's gentle kiss

she's stuck beneath the surface
empty, with pieces missing
she lives inside of him,
sailing placidly until she died

how tragic is her life,
wanting to be free
wanting to explore every inch of him
wanting to be whole again

she is just a sunken ship
whose remains will never be found

and he is the majestic sea
waiting for the next ship to come.

winter’s mourn created
a white crystal blown by the
northern wind

dismal sky under a blanket of snow
along with empty trees hybernating,
patiently waiting for spring

mother rabbit hopped
back inside the log
to hug her babies

A group of deer
scavenging on the white field
paused and looked up

There were silence
only the buzz of wind.

Even the owl peeked
but then again closed
his heavy eyelids

A gleam of parhelion
dominated winter’s despair

In that moment,
apricity showered a feast of bliss

The darkness that shattered her world was left behind. Ashes to forget, memory lost in the wind of no rewind
She finally took the narrow path towards a new life. Today, she stands so tall and bright. No one can bring her down, solid as a rock. There's no turning back.

Selfless, relentless to fear
Everything that mounts to heights of frights, she's the warrior. Inferior to nothing. Candors of cadence impossible to break. Her heart made of mettle steel, nothing can make her falter.

All phobias are mundane
Except for one. That's when she met him at edge of the unexpected.
He sits at the rooftop alone everynight. Smiling to himself as he gazed into burst of constellations brimming with life.
"Is this love at first sight?", she thought
Past of men that broke her,
made her who she is today.
But this boy with a smile that could break her Titanic's Ice,
made her vulnerable.
With a smile that could break
the ice in her temple.

The power he illuminates
can set her eyes on fire.
Her fast beating heart is jumping out
Thoughts scribbling every night,
'This is going to be a mess,
I can't decide'

He closed his eyes, feeling the euphoria flowing inside.
The chimes and the chill of wind are all he can hear. He slowly touched
his chest and feel the bliss
As he opened his eyes,
a scintillating star in his sight.
Their eyes didn't meet, yet,
He glances back without her knowing tilting his head to the left, as she watched him from her window.
He was falling and sinking into her ocean eyes. Each glance makes him drowned and drawn deeper to her.

Yesterday was a blur, tomorrow is a vivid life. Within her is starting to tear with fear. Prayers of hope she will win and take the climb. She wants to grab the chance and be happy for once in her life.*

Both having the intent to speak.
Both prepared to make the first move
But bartered smiles was all it took
Heart's stolen, melting ice
They somehow knew this love will last..
Forever.

One tedious journey, the blistering heat of the day made me stay.
I am home outside the porch exploring my eyes of the panoramic scenery of the countryside.

My mother baked Vanille Kipferl (vanilla crescents) with her own special recipe. The haunting aroma entice through my nostrils. She loves to bake especially on sunny days.

She went out to hand me a plate of cookies and mumbled how magnificent the scenery of the valleys.
True, it is breath taking but she gets to be so flibbertigibbet sometimes.

The tranquility of surroundings is exquisite.
I exhaled and it felt so good.
Rocking the chair, I grabbed an old novel from a table.
The cover was all tattered and dusty but I still flip it.

Then, I walked through a twisting thicket road bound by soil.
The vast green grass sways as the wind dance around them.
The singing of birds is beautiful.
I held my cloche hat while swaying my white regency gown like a lunatic. Every day is a gift. And that gift needs to be value.

I found a shade from an old oak tree at the top largest hill.
It was cozy but I don’t want to sleep, I’m afraid I’ll end up in a Rabbit Hole.  Instead, I climbed the tree with all my might, until I reached the edge.

Up here is different. You can see everything!

The sea is barely visible. Towns and villages are lined up. The atmosphere is heavenly. I embraced the beauty and got down from this old oak tree.

I snatched the book I left on the ground. I hugged it and when I look behind…

I am in a bridge that crosses a canal.

I found a flat-bottomed rowing boat with a man singing.
He looks funny in his striped shirt and black pants.
He grabbed his skimmer and bowed down.
There I go curtsy.
He told me he’ll show me the world. I just hopped in.
The place is floating! There are buildings with such unique architectures.

The man rowed and rowed while singing a song called “O Sole Mio”.
Since it was Neapolitan, I just listened and it sounded romantic.

He said we’re almost there.

…

The honking of vehicles and jamming traffic roused me.
I put the book inside my bag and looked in front.
The cars are huddled together.
These yellow cabs are not moving.

I descend my feet on the ground and shut the door.
The rapid combustion is hideous!

Burger joints, restaurants, people… more people. It’s too crowded.

Anyway, I made my way to this small coffee shop for a little zap!

Then the intense feeling got me clairvoyant.

Flipping pages, I come to enter a portal of a different universe.

In my own little world that no one can get me.

I am the protagonist.

5/25/14

The eerie cries of the wind
echoes through my window
the mint of its breath
blows beneath my feet
The leaves are withered
days are short
Streets are empty
doors are closed
Daylight's invisible
it feels so lonely
that my heart is torn
the flapping of birds
migrating to north
everyone's leaving
like the footsteps
you left from the storm

a.k

Who has been always there for you?

What is stopping you?

When are you going to do it?

Where will you start?

Which path are you taking?

and How are you going to survive?

In a great fountain garden,
tulips and lovely flowers bloom,
vibrant colours give life
to the Hampton Court Palace

Catherine of Aragon sat with grace,
watching the tranquil sky
as the bird sends sweet greetings
She slowly wipe the sadness coming
from her eyes

The Roman Catholic fell down from King Henry's hand
as the pope opposed his wish
Tyranny started to rule,
20 years of love and struggles come to an end

'Oh father, my heart is in pieces. Spare me the light, make me alive.'
Catherine whispered an agonized cry
begging for mercy in the Heaven's above,
she stood up and smiled in so much pain
Then slowly, she walked away
knowing Henry and Anne Boleyn is in a happy place.*

a.k

We skip school.
drink gin.

lurk late.
smoke on Mondays.

hum and dances on sin.

On late June, troubles bloom.
clouds gloom.

No tunes.
We die soon.

lonesome
as an island with
waves that roars but no one listens

a legion of people
in a downtown intersection
but I stay afloat in desolation

in the midst of a city hustle
I reclused to move

I defeated myself
and surrendered with the action

I live in a jungle of solitary
like a hermit dancing on the ocean floor

They call me Alfred Prufrock
but this is not a love song.
Oh, halt! he wasn’t writing a love song.

She wept
tears huge as a mountain
of Alaska
She never gave up
like how Kaneq
made her strong
she fought the battles
that turned her into a warrior

As an outsider
she needs to learn how to live
for there are thousand ways to be killed
in this once forbidden land

Shoot, aim and ****
sweat and blood

she believed she was weak
that’s what she believed

no one owns this land
bloodshed and atrocity
lord tyrants and battlements

the Vikings seafaring
Erik the Red with his sons
Leif and Thorvald, continuing the journey
Columbus, Champlain, Cartier...
Jacques Cartier looking for China found ‘Kanata’ and they now call Canada
captived Donnacona and his clan from Stadacona

the mariners, cartographers
no one owns this land

the slavery and civil war of Catholicism and Protestants
the ‘Black Death’ from bubonic plague

the man’s bones from the rat’s alley
below the ground with sunken skeletons
who fought with swords and knives and a broken arrow trying to dug up their way

to the bridges and skyscrapers that buried them deep with the poison of ideology
that says ‘you are not welcome’

the silent voices screams
‘this is our land, this is our land...
this is not our land and there shall be no peace.’

Do not fall inlove with a writer
they see and feel everything.
particles that somersault in the morning ray telling them to embrace the day

They can smell the haunting
aroma of a coffee
whispers 'go grab your pen and write'

they look into a person's eyes
and could witness
how a sea crash into someone's soul

Do not fall inlove with a writer
they appreciate and value everything you do

they could see the entire universe
from your smile
only the ocean could tell
their hopes and fears.

They easily fall and break too hard.

Don't fall inlove with a writer
they'll make you their muse

from good times to bad times,
you will be the lyrics of their song.

Here I stand from the assailant of the world
The burden I carry slows me from moving my feet
The daggers they throw lacerated my being

I stumbled with an agonized cry
There's a whammy inside that
I'm too frightened to fight

It's the heap of gaze where believing was crushed.
Perceiving the truth I am thrown underground
A black abyss where screaming won't make any survive.

Just when someone hand me his arm
I submerged from the hole of what's draining my heart

I thought I'm alone but the light stopped by
The lightness He creates is blinding my eyes

I learned that giving up will lose your mind
Ignore the crowd that have push you.
Auscultate what's it beating for.

Reach for the peak and look at your feet. Everyone will gape and see what's beyond.

You're a sky!
That's high you'll become.

-A

7/25/14

The saddest noise, the sweetest noise,*
Your voice that has been
the music to my ears

There are times, it mellows my heart
Sometimes, it crushes my soul
A word that rushes my blood,
making my heart pump faster and louder

The deafening silence it creates,
makes me suffocate
for the air you breathe,
polluted my lungs
like a water pulling me down in a blink

Whispers are tender,
giving me warm embrace
but the inaudible screams,
made me float in the
darkness of infinity,
wanting for a hum of lullaby
that'll kiss me goodnight

(a.k)

Weeping under my sheet. I tried to endure but one thing's for sure, there'll be no cure!

My mind's distracted like an abstract making myself lose it. There might be a dose but my eyes... please scrutinize for you to realize.

It's a dark empty room and I'm all doomed. I want you to witness and caress my wet cheeks and if only you can squeeze me tight on this cold night :(

As I recall, you disappear through a throng. Left me hanging with a thought, 'what have I done wrong?'

But this solitude is quite rude for dragging me lifelong.*

-A

8/14/14

Hours of darkness began to sigh
As daylight, no longer in sight

Gushing of water flowing placidly in the stream
Oh-what a lovely evening, to dream

My feet drag me to the wilds
The feeling of exhilaration like a child

Where the bleak twigs creak
And the frigid weather kisses my cheeks

Solitude state under the ethereal sky
How I wish you nigh

But this lonesome brought me to a place,
I call it Nowhere because my journey isn't over
For I'll always be a wanderer

she                                                        
writes a list
of all the things
    she hates about herself
in just one word:

everything
                                             ­                    he
                                                 writes a list
                                          of all the things
                             he loves about her                  
                                       in just one word:

                                               *everything

Don't let me fall. I'm scared of heights

He held my hand
kiss my worries away
he makes me smile
on a cold summer day

  he let go of my hand
            and kiss me goodbye
               that's where he made me cry
    I'll never forget your warm last hug
on that sad winter night

11/15/14

**-Adele

The crisp air of summer,
blew the kite up high

He cut the string
and whispered a goodbye

‘you are now free’

the tears trickled
until it was out of sight