The eyes are the keeper of the soul, looking into your eyes I see pain that has yet to come, happiness that you long for, saddness that yoi carry with you like a 10 ton whale. I wish I could take it all away for you, and I would if you'd just let me in. At times I dont feel sorry for the low blows I throw because the truth ******* hurts, and I am seeing the truth now, that I am nothing but a midnight snack or a dream that never fully came true. It's so hard some days to deal with all these thoughts, wants and needs, and dreams that I am trying so hard to make real yet I feel you have done nothing, just stood there as real love passes by.

I always have to remind myself that you're not my girlfriend, I said you were the other day and it felt so good, yet it hurt so bad, and hasn't left my lips again. When will I love you be true, when will this shadow of doubt leave me alone. I'd hate to see you hurt but I know I could heal you again. All I ask is for love, somethings that's real and not this midnight love affair. Im not this book you've read, I am real and I am hurt everyday. Every I love you feel likes a lie. Yet I want to feel it is true. I wish you would have the courage to end it.

The heart is wrapped in a cage
Yet it flows freely with love.

The mind wanders freely to thoughts in the abyss, the dark place in your mind where you hold all your wicked thiughts and dreams and memories.
My mind seems to always dwell there. I break free for a minute or two but it's back again and heavier than ever.

Seeking help through pills, people, drinks and music, to ease the strain. In the end though I have only myself to blame.