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Vianne Jun 2021

No words could foretell how enormously this statement troubles me. Not because of the word classmates itself... but how one would define the mere, trifling word "classmates". For some, it solely means "individuals whom you share a room and a teacher with" but for us... It's unutterable, carrying so many distinct sentiments. Too.. many sentiments. Ones that could not flow out beyond our lips how they do beyond our hearts. Though allow me to assure you from now that possibly after a few days or a few months... or maybe it will take us a decade.... and even our entire lifetimes. Still, as time breezes at the fore of our orbs, stopping for absolutely no soul... We will find new faces and fresh, delicate grins that will completely melt us. A new light, a new pathway, a new adventure. One we will be sure to relish till the very end and a new heart for us to choose and treasure, and for it to love us back correspondingly. We will fail to remember the memories. Not because we chose to. Not at all but because time stops for nobody. The future awaits your presence and so do the memories that it will be sure to grant you... Both sounder and graver memories. We may even find ourselves chuckling at the terror that we felt as we allowed the class's memories to end, lastly realizing that the change was the best of this universe's plan for us. We will thrive and progress and strive to be better because of our past memories... But they are not there to haunt us. They are there to escort us through the galaxy of endeavour... and they shall distress us, surely. No core wishes to loosen its set, desperate grasp latched on to its past. But believe me, people, when I tell you that life will not come to an end when you decide. It won't stop. Not in one million years and not ever. We will not forget the memories altogether... but surely, we will forget the emotions that our youthful souls felt back then. A smile will creep its way to our lips as we mock the innocence and naiveness that we carried within us back then... Little do we know that those memories, though now forgotten, will forever be engraved onto our hearts, bleeding as new envisions shape our book's middle and ending... We will forget. But now, while you still possess those memories, don't be afraid to remember. Because at some era in the far, far future, your eyes will scream and the rage will flow down your flushed cheeks as the past fades. They have seen so much... too much. The story that your orbs carry.... the mind will eventually forget. It's truly a shame that the heart could not speak though... because if our running feet and our old hearts and our weeping eyes could read our life's book, they would tumble down mountains. We will forget. But for now, remember and remember and remember. Do not even dare stir away from the past due to fear of unruly longing to return to the memories you once called home. Don't be a coward. It takes 0 effort to forget but your entire world to remember. And that is why it will hurt. But it will be so
******* worth it.

"Are you not tired of running?"
Their voices would echo amidst her soul... "How could I?" she would ask with the wildest of grins.
"When living is all I know."

I will smile because it passed. And I will laugh because it happened and shaped my future for the better and nothing less.

Even after my eyelids seal, and the horizon ignites atop the fiery shores. At the end of the night, I shall endure on my two feet, once more. All alone, certainly but I will get through the hell of this life. Because this heart of mine, though bent, refuses to die.

Because you have shown me the power of dreams when they are sought after. Even if each breath takes a lifetime to catch.

I will cross borders, gaze beyond the obvious and search for what makes us blind. I will live. With purpose.

Until we meet again,

Vianne May 2020
𝒯𝑜𝓃𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉'𝓈 𝓇𝑒𝓂𝒾𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇.

☆꧁༒Know the difference between love and lust.

When you CHOOSE someone, you are affectionate, careful, and genuine towards them. It is out of love, admiration and respect, that you treat them like the most fragile thing.

When you WANT someone, you are affectionate expecting something in return. You are careful, to get what you want. And genuine about one thing. And that is your desire. It is out of Lust, passion, and ***, that you treat them like the most fragile thing.

Don't mess these 2 things up.

If you want them to keep them safe and happy, to make the best memories, to spend an eternity with them... you are more then welcome to LOVE them.

If you want them for their body, for the pleasure they will bring you, to show off what you "own"... you are not welcome to USE them for your wishes and LUST. Before you hurt yourself and them, please let them go. One day, trust me, you will find the person that you will love purely, out of, of course, LOVE and not LUST. So spare a heart, before you break it.༒꧂☆

☆✰★⋆ night light world
#goodnight #Tonight'sREMINDER
Vianne May 2020
"𝘚𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺, 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘦𝘭. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘺? 𝘋𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘪𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘪𝘦?

𝘉𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸, 𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥, 6 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥, 𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥, 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴.

             𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 6 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥,
        𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘰 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢 𝘣𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭𝘴 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯.                                                          𝘐𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦... 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦, 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘭𝘺, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘵.

𝘐𝘧 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘪𝘵𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯....

𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘨𝘰 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘥𝘢𝘺."

⁻ 'ˢⁱⁿᶜᵉʳᵉˡʸ, ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖᵃˢᵗ'
⁻ 'ᵀᵒ ᶠᵘᵗᵘʳᵉ ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ ʷʰᵒ ʳᵉᵃᵈˢ ᵗʰⁱˢ:
ʸᵒᵘ ᵐⁱˢˢ ᵗʰᵒˢᵉ ᵗⁱᵐᵉˢ ᵈᵒⁿ'ᵗ ʸᵒᵘ..? ᴵ ᵈᵒ ᵗᵒᵒ. ᵗʳᵘˢᵗ ᵐᵉ... ᴵ ᵈᵒ ᵗᵒᵒ'
Vianne May 2020
"ɪ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀꜱᴛᴀɴᴅ, ᴛʀᴜꜱᴛ ᴍᴇ. ɪ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ɪ ᴀᴍ ꜱᴇʟꜰɪꜱʜ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴄᴏʟᴅ, ɪ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ Qᴜɪᴠᴇʀ ɪɴ ꜰᴇᴀʀ. ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴇᴇɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ꜱᴄʀᴇᴀᴍ ʙʀɪɴɢꜱ ᴍᴇ ᴊᴏʏ, ʙʀɪɴɢꜱ ᴍᴇ ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴜʀᴇ, ᴀɴᴅ ʙᴀʙʏ, ᴛʜᴀᴛ'ꜱ ᴀʟʟ ᴍᴇ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴇᴠɪʟ," ɴᴏᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴇᴠɪʟ'ꜱ ᴛᴏʏ. ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ʙɪᴛᴇ, ʀᴇᴀʟ ʜᴀʀᴅ. ᴄᴀʟʟ ᴍᴇ ꜱᴀᴛᴀɴ, ɪᴛ'ꜱ ᴍʏ ʜᴏɴᴏᴜʀ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ɪ ʙʀᴇᴀᴋ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄʀʏ ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴄʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴏᴜᴛ ɪɴ ᴀɢᴏɴʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀɪɴ, ɪ ᴀᴍ ɴᴏ ʟᴏɴɢᴇʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴇᴠɪʟ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴍᴇ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ʜᴜᴍᴀɴ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀᴅʏ ɪɴ ᴅɪꜱɢᴜɪꜱᴇ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏɴꜱᴛᴇʀ ᴡɪᴛʜ 100 ᴇᴍᴏᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ᴀʟʟ ᴘᴀɪɴᴛɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ ᴀᴛ ᴏɴᴄᴇ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴛ ʜᴇ ɢɪʀʟ ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴀꜱ ꜰᴏʀᴄᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ɢʀᴏᴡ ᴜᴘ. ꜱᴏ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ ꜱᴇᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴛᴇᴀʀ ʀᴏʟʟ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ᴍʏ ꜰᴀᴄᴇ, ᴜɴᴅᴇʀꜱᴛᴀɴᴅ ɪ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴɴᴏᴛ ꜱᴇᴇ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇɴ ɪɴᴛᴏ 1 ᴍɪʟʟɪᴏɴ ᴘɪᴇᴄᴇꜱ. ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴀɪɴ ɪ ᴛʀʏ ᴛᴏ ʜɪᴅᴇ, ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴏᴋᴇʀ ꜰᴀᴄᴇ ɪ ᴡᴇᴀʀ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴇᴇᴍ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ ʀᴏᴄᴋ. ɪᴛ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴇᴠᴇɴᴛᴜᴀʟʟʏ ꜰᴀᴅᴇ, ɴᴀᴍɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴅᴀʏᴅʀᴇᴀᴍ ᴅʀᴇꜱꜱᴇᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ ɴɪɢʜᴛᴍᴀʀᴇ "
Vianne Apr 2020
I found this story on insta....pls check it out. this post is all about it  (ctto)

        it's true armys, where did that contagious bunny smile go? why? why do people have to be like this? all questions that have been rushing through my broken mind. it doesn't have to be like this. he shouldn't get this. yet he does. and it breaks me to watch day by day, that smile fade....
it breaks me..
because i truly want him to have everything. i will give him my life,

but how do I do that? how can I make him happy...

                    a girl that loves him...who is miles away...she is so far away. so hard to reach him, give him her touch. so far to whisper in his soft ears that he is enough. she wants the very best for this angel but how can she give him the 'very best' when she will never pass that test. she wants him to know how much she cares. that "it doesn't matter what they say. you are perfect by the way".... but when reality hits hard.. that no matter how much she believes, she will never feel his heart. she will never be able to tell him "i love you so much". she can only cry, and watch as he breaks and sighs.
but no matter what happens, she made a promise "i promise to never say goodbye" but she will stop to try. trying to stop all his tears while her eyes blur from her own. because she knows no matter how hard she tries and tries, she will never be the one. the one to stop him from falling apart. she goes crazy every night, her head feeling so light. her broken voice whispers out
"I love you so **** much. I want you to love yourself. to not listen to them. because you are perfect my love. I don't want you to cry anymore. that's enough of the tears and heartbreaks. those people that hate, they aren't worth your precious time. I know it's hard...pain kills. but I am here...and you don't know that. but I am here. so I just hope you realize that you are my world and... I don't ever wish to see you fall. so while I am lying on my knees, ready to die. do me a favour and smile. do me a favour and get up on your would make my life"
and then reality hits again... she can wish and wish and try every second of the day...but she will never get to say this to his face. only in her head, it's true that he will be hers, but outside her cruel mind, she realizes "he will never be mine".
and the pain, once again, she burst out into tears, finally accepting the fact that
"I am just a fan"
Vianne Apr 2020
You're here for a reason... after all

winter is just a season
Vianne Apr 2020
You: I can't anymore. I can't take this. What's even the point??

But you will live..., right? your breathing. your heart is beating. you love. you hate. you cry. you smile. you get angry and *******. you act like a human. and your alive...right?

so why, after all these years, after nine months of your mom's hard work, after your parent's taking your crap and spoiled *** for so long... why end it?

the day you started walking... you made a promise. that you'll forever run. never to stop.

no matter what. until the marathon finishes. it's not your job to end this path... it's when the path ends.. it ends. it's when the bridge ends, it ends.

it's not your responsibility to jump off the bridge. your job is to keep walking, keep running. even if your feet step on sharp glass...

you'll soon walk on gardens. of course, there will be painful thuds, hard rocks that you will have to carry your body on... but you never stop.

because there will be flowers under you hurt toes soon. and the wounds will heal. and again. there will be glass poking at your flesh. except again, there will be a garden that will heal your cuts.

and that my love is how our lives work. through bad and through good, the day your little cute body started walking, you are bound to never give up.

So don’t tell me you can’t do this anymore. There is a garden coming. No matter how hard this part of the path is...the beauty will unfold. Be patient. Wait.

even years. Just wait... And you’ll see that it really does get better, happier, and it will be incredible.

Don’t tell me you're going through worse than I ever went through. Don’t say I don’t understand. Because I am walking on this path too. When I first started walking on, it was the day I was born. It’s called life. Only one path, one life. And me, you, us, everyone, will walk and walk and walk till the very end.

Until it ends..not when you end it. So do not ever end this path. Do not ever end your life...
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