I pulled an all-nighter.
For an insomniac
That doesn't seem like
Such a great thing,
But there's a difference.
Staying up all night
Because I can't fall asleep
Is immensely different
From staying up
Because I'm trying not to sleep.
And you know that as an insomniac
I love sleep
Because it's so fleeting
Like whispers of wind
Slipping through my fingers--
Practically impossible to grasp!
And despite this...

I pulled an all-nighter
*Because I was waiting for you.

Restless*
This summer skin grown tight
I stretch, breathing in three a.m.
Coating my lungs with the promise
Of your early morning smile
To think it is not only earth, ocean
But also time that separates us
Different planes of existence
Both aching with it's unyielding strength
Wishing on stars as they plummet
Kissed too hard by gravity's lust
Burn you up with hopeful flames
Licking at your vulnerabilities
Time will tell, as it always does
The story of our struggle
Laced with sweetness and smiles
Lessons learned but be this the greatest
"No matter how long it takes, no matter how far. I will find you."

I cannot say with any more ease
What you cannot say to me
I'm standing here holding my heart open
Your's is still running
Can't seem to see
You send your apologies on rough waters
Led by white sails
But what love is this that keeps you lying?
What truth is this that leaves me dying?
So you push me away
You pull me back
A constant emotion you fade to black
Should it hurt the way I feel?
Or should I do as I have learned and deal?

The cracks in the sidewalk are forming a pattern.
Keeping away those foreign to this land.
If you don't belong here,
don't be long here.

It is funny how the snow falls
over the trash and bricks.
A blanket of white that hides the problems.
The deafening sound of sorrow.

A retirement home retired.
Covered in graffiti and ****.
This talking must stop.
The sky is growing darker and the nights
they are below freezing.

Driving down alleyways and watching the apocalypse prequel.
Slam!
The car stops, not wanting to move.
The reverse went out long ago.
Everything that had promise
is broken.
Shattered glass reflecting hope back into the sun.

I have not put pen to paper in a good while.
It is probably for the better.
The blinds hide the world.
Listening to movie trailer music,
I write and hope.

What happens when you get older?
I hate it when people say they are "young".
You're 40 years young?
No.
You're an *******.
We are dying from the moment of birth.
Don't forget that.
Pessimistic and proud.

Sometimes I sleep with the T.V. on at night.
A constant reminder that my dreams can give way to
war,
famine,
Perez Hilton.
If this is how the World ends,
life was good.

You see...
This is why I don't write anymore.
Poems that give way to inner thoughts.
How deep and depressing.
I could write more...

I won't.
Maybe.

Poems that end like highway wrecks.
Leaving you wanting
nothing,
but a refund.

Slam.

Florida hot sand winds carrying the rich scent of citrus
Waft through open stalled markets
A thousand flora exposed to my salivating glands
Creamy veined melon rinds, sweet and dewy
Are pale globes gracing the chest of our own mother earth
Feeding all of her children with sun drenched nectar
I discover the prickle of Pineapple
Sharp edges similar to that of Loki's temperament
Playful, forgiven,  excused for it's very nature
Bins of giant emerald plantains
Sit bulbous, suggestive and engorged
A not so delicate reminder of the Forest God's potency
Enough to curve the blush of any maiden's cheek
My hair lifts with the breeze
Catching every scent in a swirling kaleidoscope of colors perfume
Ready to bottle and bring me right back to this moment
The market's end is near, one last row
Mangos as far as the eye can see
I pluck a Champagne from the pile
Bite in deep, juice running down my now-happy-childhood chin
Mmmmm....giving over to the experience of such bright flavor
Spirituality at it's most base
*This must be the taste of God's ******

He sat in silence
Face buried in his liquid amber glass
Smoky shadows cloaked slumped shoulders
I knew that weight
It's mantle one of regret
Soaked in guilt
Did his mistake lead him here
To drown?
He swallows suddenly
Great sobs flood sore eyes
We are all tattered, scattered, trying to find our way
I edged close enough
To lay a comforting hand
Breathing in the haze of his grief
Dead weight leaned into mine
Wet shoulder, tangled hair
All he needed was to feel...something
Something more than his own chill
"You are not alone" I whisper
*None of us are

My body is weak and restless
Toys scattered, sweated brow
Been working at tiring myself out for hours
Nothing gives
****** after mind blowing ******
Still hungry
Ravenous, without satiation
Unable to keep my hands to myself
Therein lies the problem
Want and need **** a fine line
Between my ability to control and my ability to let go
Breathe it all in, in one great gasping breath
Your scent ribbons through the chaos
Single minded focus on Northern winds
Edged with snow capped romance
Gets me going, gets me hot
Too hot, drop it
Butterflies join the descent
Crimson splashes behind my eyelids
Oxygen deprivation presses in with heavy, leadened weight
Just. A. Little. More.
Yessssss
Echoing cries as back bowed, muscles wound tight
Explosion. Atomic fire ball. Liquid.
Catching air from the landing
I curl up into a self-love hazed ball
Ready for the next round