i am a bead of sweat
on the skin, on the streets
of my town

on a bike, cuts through
soft summer night
i lead the desecrated
fight.

i have siphoned my blood to birth art,
but it always turns black
and here in my body
the world ends in a scream.

i'm riding so fast
i just can't seem to be
a friend to the dream,
a friend to the dream.

What's swallowed is swallowed--
It's that weak look you give an enemy whom you know has ransacked you
But whom you must tolerate

I should rage against it, right?
But my memory fails me anyway
Pieces of me crumble and drop into the nether
Uneven microcosms of my own death

Insults that leave me raw and burdened
The black is the black,
It is not me but what i am lacking
The destruction of my soul
Tiresome

Are you ready for another
Succession of characters
Completed perfectly
There are no bad poems here

I am the north
I am the south
I am the life that I don't know about
Maybe you're versed
Yeah, you've caught a wind
You owe it all to me
I'm your progenitor

I am the east
I am the west
I am the first, the last and second best
Blame it all on me
I've got it figured out
I'm your progenitor
Faith and your doubt

i've always wanted to throw a party exactly like the music video for Le Disko by Shiny Toy Guns

The bride of crystal Love,
The only one with the right to sacrifice the body:

She told me a secret.

I am forbidden to tell you,
But I am not the only one.

Come wonder with me at intersecting circles,
Come see! the cosmos is her jewelry.
Come before the storm arrives and wipes us all out.

We are in communication
We are suspended here as one Breath
And lo! when the breath of life leaves us
Our lives and lips are sealed.

I want to saturate space with an impossible plasma
And rejuvenate you
I hate time for dragging us forward
Crippling your hearing
Dwindling us down

My love for you burns more intensely than all the fusion
Of all the stars in the universe
I may not always act like it but life is crazy
And it's true

And I hate that it feels like we could only love as much as we could,
That we were limited somehow

In a reversal of roles I want to protect you
And I fear that I am the one who is hurting you
Which is one of those things we could just never admit to each other
Because it's sort of not true anyway and the angles from which it is true feel evil,
Inimical.

I know that by my nature I cannot protect you.

Can i even do anything for you at all?

Or was that just a lie I told myself?

I'm dead,
Exploded bits with action potential sticking around
Always dreaming of some stallion that I'll never be
What do I do for humanity?
Nothing.

I'm pulling at straws

There! see all my friends having fun
Many are friends past whose specters I see
On an unfeeling screen.

See me, tinted blue and trying hard
Bored and left behind
I am not in a rock band
I am not seeing new places
I am not kissing girls.

All people want is someone to feed them funny things
But I don't have the resources to give you a good time
What did you expect me to do in the meantime

Do have any idea what you do to my sleep
To my confidence, to my dreams?
Overburden me, sure, you'll just make me more passionate
and angry

But laid-back, peaceful... Let's get it
Let's change the world
Take off a day, smoke some ****
That's what I want to be

You're allowed to believe in your lies
And I in mine
We get better and better
Until we're quite
divine, and

Divine

Someone's fingers
play up and down my spine.

These eyes have changed from
Boyish circles
To triangles with their backs to each other

The impossible must become the simple,
Infinity must meet economy.

Give yourself to yourself
And set free
All the innocent prisoners in your soul
Because the world has enough of them.

You have spun nothing to glory
Do it again and again til the wheels stop turning.

The expanding universe brings death, but also doctors:
Moments in time where transcendence takes hold
Secured by love
Yet it's bought and sold

A standard that was never gold alone.

I've had to carry weights and let them go.

I've been making love to a world
That holds a knife in my brain.
She says "change"
And gives me the love of death.

Animals **** in the wild,
They bite each other's necks.
The sky ***** the Earth
And space at the same time.

Death ***** life but she's only sometimes exciting
The world is an ****, it's always inviting
The head of the company ***** you on drugs
Your soft little *** gave his ***** a hug

The dirt ***** your body, can you feel it pour in?
Every oraface covered, original sin
For now you are breathing, your breath ***** the air
But somewhere the world says there's nobody there.

These nights under construction,
My body is sore.

I ride my bike home through the dark,
The headlights **** past
And underneath me the world is making its slow rotation into the future.

I take my heavy legs off my bike and make light noises in the dark
But in my silhouetted skull thoughts of her are buzzing.

The girl who's loving me a few towns over
Loving me even in her sleep,
Telling me I
Am what she needs.

Will I ever give my songs to waiting crowds, I don't know
Or write a book that strikes a flame in the halls of history?

Either way, the ones behind my webcam know what I'm capable of.

But it's the girl that makes it right,
She is so cute, so passionate,
So honest in her love
And my trembling hands see an opportunity to make just this one thing right.

So even if it's only ever that, it'd be more than enough.

The night digests me and confirms the wrinkles already setting in my 24-year-old face
As I wander around my parents' house and slowly decline into sleep.

And you,
You fill my head with such hopes
You make my stomach glow and I feel you curled up next to me
Your skinny little body--
I love kissing your forehead
Before we go to sleep.

I flew over myself today
Not under or next to
Well I guess it's all the same

A dewdrop and a spider's leg
A paramecium and a Michelin tire
A speck of patience on the dusty guitar

Some angels said I lost my way
Well, I'd see things the other way
But there is no other way

A caterpillar in the sassafras
A punk band you never listened to
A canal passing free radicals into the ocean
Free radicals are like shooting stars in your membrane

Me, I'm free
I am a free radical
I am a lawless creature
Trying to pass as a repository
For wayward conscious energy

Yeah! Ra ra ra!
Let the sun shine on!
Write melancholy poems
About how you feel
How you feel it all means nothing
Yes, live on!

Disjointed but go on:

And then you said there's not one way
Honey-- we were built the same
We're teaching ghosts arithmetic
It keeps us in good conversation
And you know I let you sink in
When I do
You can feel it
We're permissive.

The several elements,
All things through and through and through itself
There you are in the middle
No, off to one side
And you're nowhere
Navel-gazing at your veiled intestines, no...
Pick them up off the floor.

No convention is necessary
It shatters, erupts in flames, turns to ashes
Gets passed along to itself
Cycles black or ultraviolet

We need to come together and act weird
Drawn and quartered by gleaming cities
Like an ancient Picasso beneath rubble that's not here yet
Nothing will happen,
It will be fantastic.

The grail has been left on the ***** bedroom floor,
You stumble around the earth looking for any answer
A cigarette, keep the cellophane
Used as a baggie to hold your cancer

The gift is discarded with the body
The trash has been building in your room for years
You never cared anyway,
You swallow back those tears

The world is cold and stark
You want to blend in with that dark
Ride the baffling wind until you're caught on a chain-link fence
In some park.

Don't you ever doubt my love--
We are made of the same **** stuff
It's for those like you I fight
Against the empty quantm'of night

Rosy for no reason...
Bicycle-pierced misery
Petals fall to puddles,
Reason for no roses.

Bloom before you choke.
See what you can see!
Pedal through that sea and cut
A handful for your love.

Whatever is your bicycle,
Get on and pedal hard
You'll make it safe to work, and dear
Next year you'll buy a car

Chase the gray away like birds
Cutting through the rain
Rise atop the hill and plant
A flower for your pain.

Yes, this is it
You knew it was coming
Adults younger than you
Rock stars and business tycoons
Younger than you

Your stomach in a knot
You loser
You are just an average one.

Where did you really
Expect to be now, reactor?

The world is moving on without you

Folly
comes in many flavors.

You behave differently now...

I know what you'd say:
I'm overthinking it
I need a mental health check

But I know what I saw,

The way you act now
It's like I can tell how it's all in my head.

Deny deny deny

She will be there.

To cut the string that ties all her fingers
to all my guts
With that katana on the wall, or
A blade like Nordic ice, or
the very last beat of my heart.

Standing over.

These forfeited days dressed so strange
In my last breath.

Show the world, and be the victor
Of my death.

Of course he has to write a poem
For his biological mom

All fractals and dancing crystals
Singing life across the world

They're spinning bravely on woodland trails,
All trilliums and violets and pink lady's slippers
Even invasive narcissus, obliged by the drops of morning dew

He's happy there,
And he thinks to himself:
I must have come
From somewhere...

She is a blazon of Love
Vibrant with galaxies, nebulae
And bioluminescence
The glow of her mind sprouting flowers and funny things

Deep in her heart,
She finds Love as a spring

Dream maker

Damming myself from the silent omen
That slips off the skin of the brave and broken
I miss the way my skin was last spring
I miss the things I'll never be
I twitch in the sunlight and stare
I will never be a king

Hang love up in the open air,
You were never meant to be just a wall
On your windowsill,
Chips of bone and broken teeth from last fall.

My son was born to be a warrior
Busting through time
Woven from nothing

I remember the mental clinic
In my teens and early twenties
You could call it the millenial clinic, too
Cause you know how we do

Check yourself in

I remember how I rammed my father's car
With the one he bought me
I remember being that disease
Chalking it all up to a cheat

I remember breaking things in anger
Breaking things in anger
Breaking things in anger
Train station night
Running over someone's car
Going back to sleep
Knowing I'm wrong

I remember the county jail
*****, terrifying
Stay away from me
I'm not the one you want
I can't sleep

I remember the sting of defeat

This is the land of the free.

It snakes through cities and farms,
Growls in parking lots
And goes like lightning down highways
Choking and spitting on itself
Organs serenade eachother
In a wheezing harmony.

I am the bobbing head of a poet.

I want to work
Diagonally
Scratch deep thoughts into your concrete
Make a living off of party favors
And help you get on your feet

I know what you need--
I know what I wanna be
Is a flag, rather than a buttress or beam
And you could say I'm arrogant
But that's the life
I want to I lead.

I can't wait to
Splash into
Unhinged love again
This time my soul will be symmetrical
And I will swim with the strokes of a man
An artist man
And not a boy

I won't stop to measure how unfortunate the water is
But maybe to worship the sun god Ra
All over her body
Her hips are smooth as brushstrokes

It's free summer.

I'm getting ready for a little taste of
Paradise

This side of things.

Something in the towering urban structure seems collectively
Demonic, maybe my mind is looking for origins of Death.

I'm a vagrant tucked into a cranial shell
Improvising theatrics, painting the halls of reality
With pigments I've garnered along the way.

When spirit formed me the Satan must've pushed out like oil in water
Hid on the other side of the Universe, in black holes
A deep wound incorrigible to sweet Raphael
Black and slimy Satan craving admission
That I have black slime in my blood.

I try to offer my mind an example of a quanta of Gabriel,
an example of mostly Raphael, a purely Satanistic idea,
a time Michael won. But everything rotates like the four-sided figures
described by Ezekiel, and everything is God. God, God, God.

Or whatever vocabulary you choose to express this feeling.

Because this feeling comes from my concrete thoughts.
Thinking, "The new surveillance state sure changed culture sociologically
and psychologically"
Always results in thoughts like, "Yeah but it seems like people generally balance the equation when there's a need for it."
And then the negative, "Yeah but in some instances this really ***** for some people!"
And then, both considered, "Well, it's just another arrangement of matter,
and it'll be deconstructed and something new will happen, and that is good."

Or something like that.

And over and over again I have that ...caboose at the end of my trains of thought. That's the caboose.

Ha ha, I'm going insane. Maybe I need a pharmaceutical.

Observations need to collapse to occur. So maybe before I turn this corner, there are angels and demons fighting it out, deciding
what i'll see when the waveform collapses. I mean, in a way, that's true.
And did you know about quantum decoherence? That kind of thing is really interesting. i am capable of understanding this wide variety of things. i'm endlessly curious. & I could totally be socially normal and everything
but right now i'm just writing, and whatever
i do it because it's fun and it feels good to write
for some reason i'm not a celebrity yet
kind of dumb if you ask me, but okay
and for some reason where's all the ladies
like **** that noise! lonely af
it's just complete nonsense, and right now i'm just writing. **** it. lol

I hold guilt like a treasure
But start to feel stupid
Hold on, I said, you don't know what I mean
Only what I meant

Well what I mean is constructed only of intent
Which hardly brings me solace
I'm counting on potential.

Only someone so privileged and used to being safe
Would act this way.

Well, I love you, and I hold it like a treasure
Because I think I've got some time
To make my life a little better

And pondering the outcomes given easier paths
Is inimical to my profession,
I want to stop going over those neural pathways

In infinite succession you will find Jesus Christ
In our world without proof and erased history, he existed.
he did, and he is there. He was man and God in one.
He was the messiah who came. It's just how you choose to believe in Him.
Or maybe not, maybe it is anathema if you believe in some other thing.
See, these things are what they are. God has found you.

think, what his name means. perfect circle. the epitome of human existence. like, a gauge boson of love, or am i going too far?

it's all good.
that is, if you choose to believe it is.

i hope you aren't looking for answers in these words,
cause, oh... dear lord. you'll be looking for
an eternity, child!

The human God is so confounded in polyphony
Frustrated in the midst I stand, dissonance pulls at me
I have learned to scream, "SHUT UP!!!" while maintaining
Complete silence, so as to not upset the dream.

The monster wardens of the dream frighten me,
They brandish chains and make me urinate into cups
They make assumptions and speak in strange tongues
I don't understand.

I know the right way to treat me, I have touched its face
But these monster wardens of the dream
Have their own agenda, they color the room wrong,
Sting, Misunderstood, Sourstomach Green.

When I have such potential if I could airlift myself
And drop him into the correct place,
With instruments and a small apartment
I'd help lots of people, but apparently I need a degree
I need proof, I can't be a felon
I destroyed property.

And mother says it isn't proper to ask for a patron,
That's begging and it's for people with cancer.

Call me a whiny Western cliche, I don't care,
Despite that my record has real value
And my staunch observation cuts right through
The idiocy of everything I've had to go through

I was a problem child, but YOU were a problem circumstance
I blame the space between all of these people:
A problem county, a problem country, a problem lawyer.
A problem jail, a problem lover, a problem parent.

I will face my problems squarely
When i feel a little less depressed
Than I felt today.

The sky has turned ultraviolet
And the people's hair lifts towards outer space
Like it does when submerged in water

The stakes are high,
The secrets are sealed tight
And everything has eyes

The cars are fast and the world looks more lopsided
Than ever.

And she is hot, white-hot
So hot she is cold, her essence unfolding
Mocking figurine gods, deceiving the people
By giving them science and the truth.

Good merit makes her look an ugly ten, dripping with gold
and material goods, she has put disdain in my heart for these things
But slipped in a second guess, and then, I find beneath that
A deep respect and appreciation for all things under the sun

For taste and for culture
It turns you on that she is so crazy,
That things have gotten to this point
You're likely to wrap yourself in her **** form
Pull her close to you, because the world is ending (it is)
And fire is coming from the sky

Or maybe it's just from her eyes.
They are everywhere

I watched you tear them apart.

You are such sick juxtaposition
But that's just one man's opinion.

And it's only a gesture of desperation,
To speak of you as if you were person.

Because in the corner of our minds we know we're lost along boundless corridors of time,
And yet here we are.

open on all sides!

And when you see them starving and diseased and stopped short by cars and drugs,
Maybe the reason it hurts so much is because we are less important than we suppose.

To me at least, I reconcile all that's hard to take with the joy of simply being,
But what a strange thing to see it bear such prisons of pain
And then to leave, I guess, the realm of human judgment altogether
Away from the idea of joy, to whatever else the universe ...becomes?

And it racks my mind because all I know is this *human

yellow pasture
sitting resplendent,
drinking water.
trees submerged in a balmy sea of air
don casual green boughs
and i'm sitting
god slipped me just between the yellow sky
and the yellow grass
of the pasture

that is where the Only Traveled Path leads
but a stinging noise began in the corner of the sky
and who knows why?

and what comes after?

Lost among crowds it is found in her eyes
Run like a river through the veins of her mind
Run like a river, you'll find your own heart
But when we part,

Hope it's all shown to be something unique
Know all the husk gather up round your feet
You are a weird fruit and a weird fruity explorer
Laugh like a king!
Bring my chaos to order

Would you like an extra helping of slaughtered pig?
The gavel smacks differently every time
As lips smack differently,
And hearts beat unevenly

They are like those arcade games that push coins over the edge,
All beating, all grotesque and slovenly
Because science had to bleed into an art
So ignorance and anarchy could rule our minds

Bleeding and beating at random, greasy with blood
That is exactly how you'd like it
The sting of tears makes whole the meat of laughter
The incessant wrong and the pervading light
Empty space, quantum night
Sunrise come, make it right

And disappear into the void

My vocabulary is thinning
You should read a book
Forget about me, I'm
Left behind

I keep a garden of dead and dying roses
It reminds me of the time you died before you got it done

I water the roses of other worlds,
And those of demons
They're luscious and complete
Floating somewhere in my eye

I guess I could have tried
Could have tried to be an artist
But I am just an idiot,
I am just some guy

To know I could have done it
Is my ***** little secret
Dead and dying roses,
Dead and dying eyes.

*******
you never existed

i just gotta glitter up my ******* then im going to bed

you're insane and hilarious so I love it

doesnt everyone do that before they go to bed?
for the **** fairy?
thats what eminem's uncle told me to do.....

oh my god it's so funny
you crack me up dude

no someone pls put reid back together
we need to go to cape may tomorrow!!
ill take you to the beach reid : ' )
ill throw ur cracked up shard amongst the waves
but i shall save your sphincter, and wear it around my neck at all times

then you would dismantle me
you're hilarious af bro
you win

I'm a lost cause, love
Every argument
Buried in eternal silence

Now I'll scar my brain
I will waste away
And forget the taste of trying

I really loved you
It was the last time I felt alive
But I was broken
Now I'll twist myself some more

And it was my fault
Should have recognized
What you tried to give to me

I will mutilate myself
I was never meant to love

Garrulous.
Crunchy leaves don't lament the lack of artfulness
Nor artifice, or the lustful way in which I
Walk out of Kristen's house
Expecting them not to attack

I just ramble on and on
Waiting for you to draw your blade
My neck has always been naked
I don't wear steel plates

Brandishing it all the time
Your teeth sparkle in the sunlight
When you smile, they shine
Once I was a kid, back then it never forked my mind

What I do inside is not wrong
And that doesn't mean I'm clinging to pride
The way nature touches herself
Are we like the mantis?
Did you warn me not to do it again?

The brown leaves skitter across the street
They cannot escape and so they hope to be crushed up into dirt
And sometimes get swept up and strangled by plastic bags
But even plastic burns when you get it hot enough

So maybe the ocean is really getting cleaner every second

VERSE 1.

Sli-
ther

INto my mind,
And SEE through-my eyes...
The BIG ger PIC-ture
Is a BIG surPRISE!

I NOticed you there,
I DON'T real-ly care
I THOUGHT you-should know
You were the only... one, out, HE-RE!!

(dramatic silence)

Don't cry

(more insts)

With BILLions of us
You're WILLing to trust
With SPILLing your guts
You think you're better off?

And WHEN you feel dead,
And ****** in the head
Keep LIVing through me
Vi-car-i-ous-LY-Y!

PRECHORUS.

So welcome tooo me!
We're living through ME!

CHORUS.

Woah, It's just another injection
Ohhh... We're here for your protection
Won't you please just shut
Your ******* trap?

Woah, I got some men in the lobby
Ohh-oh, don't need to bury your body
When we're six feet down,
No coming back.

VERSE 2.

There's NOwhere to start
Got ICE in my heart
It's NICE to make art
But I. don't. think. WE--

Billions of us,
You're killing for lust
There's billions of us
There's billions! There's BILLIONS!!
(?)

PRECHORUS 2.

mockingly, as in "Hang 'Em High"

And all ah-long, we wrote you songs
No dedicace, when you know you're wrong
You chemical, you little *****
You ****** us

YOU REALLY ****** US!!

CHORUS

Ohhh! It's just another injection
Ohhh... We're here for your protection
Won't you please just shut
Your ******* mouth?

Ohhh, I got a ******* hotel now
Ohhh, I think I'm going to hell now
And we're all just six feet un-der-GROUND!

Massive creaking noise

Loud whispering

BRIDGE.

You just turn around now,
And face it alone
Just turn around and leave us
And never come home

(You thought you had the answers
You thought you were the key
You'll never fix this,
But at least you'll be free)

LAST CHORUS

(?)

Unexercised eyes grow narrow.
I kinda want to impress you.

Slump over,
Stifle my own fire.

Nature is oil in rainwater pools
A man in a suit
Makes aggressive moves
Nature is construction worker food
And steel beam bones going past the window

Nature is farms and farms of farms
Nature is a 5 o clock alarm
Nature is resplendent in the penthouse
Nature starved the young child.

Nature is the best that we can be,
Nature is hanging from a tree.
Nature is the sound of rock and roll
Nature is a steaming casserole,

What organization, I ask
Are we supposed to take?
What optimization leaves our lives
At best stake?
I seek harmony in love and science,
In mathematics and love
Because I see what they're doing in my world
And I have to say,
They are not running it as best as they could,
They just ******* AREN'T.

If you
Were dead-set on collapsing
It's just something that happens

This won't be easy and it's
Gonna take some time

And let the poison pass by

Because God knows there's enough up above
And inside me
Inside you is the sky

Grace this filthy wasteland
With the touch of your hand
With fingertips like wellsprings--
Your voice,
A warm string.

Give life to this place--
Blighted by the curse
Alight it deep with meaning,
Percussing with your heart.

Take the shriveled oak
And let it shine bright once again!

Gather all unopened treasures
And make their contents known!

Rake decay from every child,
Violent waters-- make them mild!
Lock away the conflagration
That's shown its ceaseless fury.

And while you sew this garden
Tuck with fervor every seed
And be sure to thank good Michael
For every passionate deed!

For anything specific
(The sinuses of leaves)
Is afforded by a terminus
(The history death weaves)
And if you ever laughed,
You laugh at death
You murderous ****!
So take another beating
For the monster you've become.

I give birth to chemical boy
Halo swim in halogen water
Summer sun here, tree limb overhang there
Emergent halo, the world is my halo, whatever happens

Organic chemistry of the tree limb,
Physical reality of the sun
Tracing the same line
Turning like a kaleidoscope
Includes me swimming

No one hates me
Not even myself
Demons can't come here

Stick out my tongue at demons underwater
Thumbs in ears wiggling fingers
Demons are not people

Girl is a chemical
I don't want to think about it
"He will not like women"
Yes I will, I can evade the prophecy

A thought is a chemical too.

A cool animation is welling up in my head
I wipe it from my mind like a tear
You can't save me
I'm going somewhere terrible I can feel it

What puts nutrients in the soil?
Yes I know but never enough
And why situated there like that?
Everywhere I look I see it
Make a shark out of origami and drop it in the pool
It's chasing me around
Oh no

Sierra, Sierra, Sierra
Who is Sierra
When am I gonna die
Is it again? Or only once
What's wrong with my head

The nature of playing cards changed
I noticed that
But it's always the same
Pulling cards all day
Could you call it a stacked deck
And now the poem has written itself
Fireworks shoot out of my brain and I'm not as sad as I sound
We're in love and it's Sunday the first of October