there are nights
when the moon cannot be found
and the stars hide behind unseen clouds
on these nights
I turn to thoughts of you
that arrive on waves of  imagined shores
and saturate like sand the open wounds of memory
the images painful
yet consoling
distant  
yet within reach
here I will drift to sea
live a dream I will not remember

and I shall curse the morning rain
for taking you away

I sense a distance
almost imperceptible
but there
like the silent breath
of a ghost
or the cry of a dying star

something has left your smile
your touch
a second split into timeless truth
your hesitant kiss
sends a thousand shards of ice through my heart
the light that once flickered
is gone from your eyes

here
in the battered chambers
of this once vital heart
the uneven echoes
send signals of it's impending failure
the body relaxed in the haze of morphine
the mind alone in the dreamscape before death
a magnified tapestry of color
Sun and golden fields from a VanGogh painting
move within my thoughts
swaying and quelling the offbeat of distant drums

a lone leafless tree
a branch holding lines of crow
awaiting the rain
turn to see me
'follow them'
a voice whispers from beyond the wheatfield
they take flight
as do I
towards the darkest of the ominous clouds
'this is so worth it' I thought
just before the lightning snaked it's way across the blistering blue sky
releasing me from my mortal coil

I had to smile as I hovered there
watching them zap me again and again
bless them for their perseverance

How I arrived there
I'm not quite sure
through a rabbit hole
or through a door
was it a fraction of a second
or a thousand tears
a world that lives
within my fears?
what I saw with my mind's eye
were shades of me
against the sky
I traveled still through
realms of blue
I touched a dream I had of you

in a life that awaits
our souls would remain
together as lovers
we danced in the rain
I felt a hope I had never known
I saw a light that had never shone
and all the doubt and fear within
had vanished in the very thin
breath
before my death

it's raining today
bouncing off the roof and glass
of this 100 year old building
the room is eerily dark
as only faint Sun makes it through the skylight
the ghosts whisper and shuffle about
the cat is timid and disappears under the bed
the hum of early traffic is constant and tires splashing
through rain is irritating
I recall a dream just before I awoke
I helped a friend who's old white Cadillac wouldn't start
she had to drive to Michigan
and in the dream I thought;
'this ******* ain't makin' it to Michigan'
but I couldn't stop her
and now I wonder;
is she broke down and in a panic along I-80?
maybe I should have tried harder
but that's where I woke up
or is that where I fell asleep?
perhaps I am dreaming now
the ghosts love to watch me ponder