Rj - Hello Poetry

Rj Nov 2016

Untitled

not even these poems explain it

Nov 2016

Randolph Llewellyn Wilson

The Apologizers ...

Sorry is a magical eraser stored like a bullet
in a gun belt* ...

Rj Nov 2016

Peace of Mind

When I wanted to die yesterday I thought long and hard about what it was I really wanted

I used to want the pain. The blood. To watch death happen.

Then I realized I don't want the death I want what seems like peace after death.

But would that even exist for me?

I'm not going to **** myself it's just a reflection. I believe in a heaven and a hell. Would I be going to hell for just wanting peace of mind? I mean isn't the whole "peaceful" thing after death a myth anyways. It's just two places, one IS peace and one is the opposite. Would I be sent to the opposite in my disillusioned effort to gain peace?

Rj Nov 2016

Awaiting

How can you tell if someone has changed
Without awaiting the next time they hurt you

How can you tell if someone is truly changing for you, of if there's just a lull in the madness. Is it possible to truly believe someone will change if you're still always expecting the next attack?

Rj Nov 2016

If I Were to **** Myself

All this time I thought if I killed myself she wouldn't grieve all that much. That it'd be better off. That it'd make her happier.
But
If I were to **** myself, she would mourn. She would die inside. She would care.
*And that makes all the difference

Rj Nov 2016

Untitled

This is the time of year when you need someone to love
And someone who loves you back

Rj Nov 2016

Hallway Encounters

Walking down the hallway
He walks by and my mind races
Look down. No, look up.
Eye contact
Should I smile?
The moment is over
You awkward idiot
Stares at the ceiling
Stop no don't think of that
Finds a distraction
Stop! Stop thinking!
Reaches the door
Okay, big smile on three
Walks outside
"Hey guys what's up!"

The "he" is not a lover or crush btw