I am just a boy
one of hands
and one
of your soul
you will have to tell me
when I can let my hands



GO.

I have been cursed
Just like that bird
Who have been bemired
Who have been yanked
Who have been unwind
As a result...have been unwinged
Who have been entered
In the ring of fire forcefully

I am yapping
I am shouting
I am asking
Am i living happily?

I don't wanna be blewed
I don't wanna be blued
I don't wanna be pertused
Wanna get excused ...really!

However....

I have been cursed
Just like that bird
Who have been bemired
Who have been yanked
Who have been unwind
As a result...have been unwinged
Who have been entered
*In the ring of fire forcefully

I wonder if the big bang
was a response to god's loneliness

And maybe he sat alone for a long time
half braining ideas
about making things that
might love him

God never said
let there be light
he just put a gun in his mouth and splattered
stars across the wall of the universe

His black hole brain
something like regret
trying to **** all the stars back inside

And I think about the days you tried

But that's not like you kid
Even though you had blood
spilling out a hole in your gut
Bone white shallow breathed

There are still stains on the passenger seat of my car
Which I now call my living room
because I am homeless

And there are no walls that could hold the contents of your head
like jackson ******* bloodspatter
a pretentious painting titled
and homage to the ****** of failure

And you are not our mother
suicide cocktail
no ice

and you are not our father
an Alzheimer's ghost
Haunting a history
we never lived through

You are skinny like water
running down the zylephone of your ribcage
tinny laughter

Asking me questions like
if love is as powerful as they say it is in the movies
then why do people give up sometimes

I'll never give up I said

You asked me if I thought god was mad at you

the doctor chalked up you living
to just luck

and I think of when god made molds of men out of mud
and breathed into them
and the mud men lived
Mud must have felt lucky then

But for us its not luck
we make so much fuss
Just so the world knows
we're alive as ****

With scrambled thoughts
And tired eyes
I tried to write you
Lullabies

I feel it in my bones.
I need it.
I want it.
But I know I can't.

The urge is so great.
Will I falter?
I know I must stop.
But it seems to make me feel better.

The thought of it
Tapping against my thick skull
I must not falter.
But I always do.

Such a day as this
Will never come again;
Don’t look for future bliss,
Or think about what or when.

Enjoy the moment, let it fly;
It’s all you’ve got, you see.
Don’t hold it or even try
To think of eternity.

This Now, this very drop,
Of Time’s ongoing stream;
You cannot hold or stop
The ever flowing dream.

Ghosts are all that went before;
Phantoms lie ahead.
Stop thinking of forever more;
Future and past are dead.

Look at that sky above our heads!
Have you ever seen such a blue?
It will all be gone when this moment has fled,
There will never, ever, be two.

Just think of it, we’re kings and queens,
The instant is our domain.
Our kingdom is the fleeting scene;
We drink the cup, no drop remains.

I touch your skin, my hands caress
Your gorgeous body’s curves;
I will not fail this timely test;
I’ll hold nothing in reserve.

This moment is ours to use;
Without questions of why or how;
Let’s grab it and light the fuse,
Explode in the glory of Now.