I'm lost,
But that's the cost.

                              And I deserve it.

I opened up,
Rather than just close up.

It was my fault,
My fault alone.

I should've kept my mouth shut,
Should've never opened up.

It was my fault,
My fault alone.

I'm still lost,
But that's the cost.

                              And I deserve it.

You don't know what you've done.
You don't know why I'm hurt.

You don't really care.
And I can't blame you.

I opened up,
When I should've kept my lips shut.

In the end, what did I get?
Nothing. I just lost what was left.

So it's my fault,
My fault alone.

                              And I deserve it.

I may choose to love,
But it must be hidden.
Oh, God above;
It is forbidden!

Not uttered in the quiet winter,
Not even as soft as a whisper.
Oh, it must be hidden
For it is forbidden!

I take a chance
And steal a glance,
Oh, what a mistake;
My heart now aches!

But I cannot utter the word,
The word that I cannot afford.
It must be hidden
For it is forbidden!

I long for a day
Where I can say
The word that is hidden;
Oh, why must it be forbidden?

I remember when you told me,
“We are meant to be.”
I remember when you told my heart,
“We will never be apart.”
I remember when you whispered,
“My dreams have been answered.”

Do you remember those times?
Do you remember those lines?

I remember when you smiled at me
And told me to never change and always be me.
I remember when you looked into my eyes
And said, “These moments, with you, are the ones I will never despise.”
I remember when you told my heart,
“I will always be at your side even when death does us apart.”

Do you remember those times?
Do you remember those lines?

You don’t.
You won’t.
You are too busy telling those words
To your new “bird”

That’s what you used to call me;
“My birdy,” that’s what you named me.
I guess I’m now the “forgotten birdy”

The couple were happy, said the wedding pictures
in every corner of the house;
just a married couple too, said the still glittering wedding dress and suit
displayed in their shared bedroom; and Christian people,
said the crosses around the new house
with new furniture, the smell of pureness in the air;
but not people for organizing, said the house
packed with equipment everywhere.

The wife loved to cook, said the kitchen equipment
crowded into the large fancy kitchen
covered with bright happy colors in every corner.
They were expecting a baby, said the chew toys
and baby bottles sprawled around the house.
It was a boy, said the baby’s blue bedroom walls
and the crib with the name Caden engraved in it.
They were going to be a family, said the heartwarming card in the crib.

Something went wrong, said the gathering dust
in the abandoned house. The divorce documents
said the man left; the mirrors in the house
said the woman walked out of the door with tears in her eyes.
And the baby? His engraved name was cracked,
like a broken heart that refuses to mend.
Their love was lost, said the ripped wedding pictures,
separating the lost couple from each other. Something went wrong, they said.

"Run!
Run towards the sun!
Where it will take you to tomorrow,
Where there will no longer be any sorrow!"

I repeat those words day and night.
It strengthens me to fight,
To fight for tomorrow,
Where there will no longer be any sorrow.

I've made a lot of regrettable mistakes,
Mistakes that can make the earth quake.
I've made a lot of horrible things,
Oh, how much sorrow it brings!

But I wait for tomorrow.
I wait for the moment I'm able to let go
Of the sorrow that fills me,
Finally feeling free.

The sun rises,
The oceans quiet,
No longer in a riot.
At last, the world is empty of vices!

Here lays tomorrow,
A day without any sorrow.

All I see are lies
When I look into your eyes.

All I see is shame
When I look into your frame.

I was, of what I said, certain,
Until you suddenly became a new person.

Now I see you differently.
You’ve changed entirely.

Your eyes are honest,
Full of promise.

Your frame is respected,
No longer neglected.

Have I been wrong,
About you, all along?
Is what I see
Has always been me?

Do I own the eyes
That are full of lies?

Am I the frame
That’s full of shame?

Maybe I am.
Maybe I’m just a pathetic sham.

I wished it wasn’t true,
So I tried to see it in you.
“To do so, there’s no possible way,”
I say.

Now, I accept myself,
Because I am not someone else.

I am who I am.
I am not, anymore, a pathetic sham.