of GRAVITATION —
I want you near just as much
as you want me close

you wear my shirt from
the night before like it's your
turn to fill my space

to savor and taste
where there was only hunger
just the night before

I thought I needed
you — for me to be happy —
turns out I only
needed you to be happy —
no matter where that leaves me

let me
want your future —
   one that's
   certain and sturdy
and need your now —
   where we're
   calm and quiet

where waking up
   doesn't hurt
   anymore
   because it's
   no longer
   just
   a dream

tell me where, tell me
when I can find happiness —
so I can go there

I'm always stealing
glances and end up getting
lost in your eyes, or
is it the ocean — to be
honest, what's the difference

right hand seeks the lamp
left arm — numb with you in it
I wake up alone

when you are driving
don't slow down when the light's green
do so when it's orange

to those who told me
they did it for my own good —
I'm not good — what now?

kung pagod ka na
'di kailangang umalis
— magpahinga ka

you'll understand when
you're a parent — is a bad
way of parenting

they say, LIFE is a
                 PARTY! — maybe it is, and
                                     I'm an introvert

someone's calling me
I look around thinking — did
I forgot to pay?

our time came and went
like the few seconds of peace
in-between bullets

peal my layers off
eat me up and spit me out
plant me — I'm a seed

we had that one old
photo that always reminds
me how I wanted
to have kids with you, and you
did have kids — just not with me

you, who keep singing
a song after leaving the
room — coming back and
picking up where you left off —
like you never even left

things I left unsaid
walks the plank that is my
tongue, but they won't jump
and now roam my mouth — ghosts with
a LIFE more DEAD than ALIVE

the PARABLE of
the PLEASER:      "can you help with . . ."

YEAH
             SURE THING
                                       WHY NOT

days — blurry, nights — hazed
time poured in a glass-like stream
unremarkably

seated, my back rests
but calm deserted me when
you pressed my shoulders

I can work under
pressure — is it your job to
put pressure on me?

I'm gravitated
like rain from a thundercloud
falling to the earth

a raging river
of thoughts,  a stream of words — the
rest flows out as tears

quickly does the road
get stained by the rain that fell
fast from somewhere else

I saw you walk in—
to this place like an ocean
wave — reclaiming land
                                            (I'm the land)

as long as the sea
ends up on top of me — claimed
inevitably

Dear lover,

I've been feeding the white wolf
while the black wolf sleeps.
The sun sets, and I sleep alone.

If I feed the black wolf
while the white wolf dreams,
would I find you at sunset,
at the end of this red string?

Love,
LL

the cold wind whispers
there's nothing left for you here
so I struck a match

restless, these long nights
looking for you in the stars
found you — I found rest

inside the tunnel
the clown made you cry again
I promise not to

boy ran to the fields
his brother rose to meet him
finally, they're home

that guy who runs through
temples but stays in place — is
life an illusion

yeah, I'm twenty-eight
next year I'll be twenty-nine
— nasa'n ka na ba?

'di ko na naman
nakuha 'yung gusto ko
— nas'an ka na ba?

the wind kissed your hair
just like sakura petals
I can't look away

sakura fall five
centimeters per second
I'm falling faster

you're a sakura
and I'm a cobblestone path
waiting for autumn

I left home armored
and soon I will be back home
as a sakura⠀

桜

waves rush towards her
sand slipping between her toes
I am letting go

sarcasm demands
shared intimate history
for it to make sense

deep voice drew me in —
close enough to inhale his
secondhand stories

it will all make sense
you can't tell that to someone
who is hurting NOW‎

his LIPS — pressed to my
      nape — bear witness to    the SHAPE
                                        of my EXISTENCE

owning a pencil
must come with a sharpener
or skills, and a blade

got so depressed in
the middle of changing sheets
I slept without one
                                   (for months)

these shifting shadows
of streetlight-lit leaves make it
hard to walk home
                                     d         u          k
                                           r          n

how can you see stars
when you close your eyes shut, but
not when you're awake

look into my eyes
and you'll see how silently
I'm screaming right now

the real sin is not
in two men in love but in
choosing to hate love

skin — your skin — excites
the hell out of me like it's
fine art on the street