I realized as I was skimming
The tattered debris of my mind
That it had been quite some time
Since I had summoned you

I suppose I was relieved
I cast you back into the pond
I hope you settled at the bottom
I'll avoid the surface for a while

I dreamed of the apocalypse again
It's not as scary as one would think
I'm used to the bleak kiss of goodbye
I've almost always felt hollow

At times I wish I had the ability
To transform myself into a small
Round Alka seltzer tablet and
Drop myself into the raging sea
To dissolve and disperse into
A million small bubbles fizzing
To reach the top and dissipate
Seeing the sunrise pink and orange
Thousands of times before
Never seeing anything ever again

Can't shake this dismal dreary feeling
That finally everything is crumbling
Not sweet like a fruity baked confection
But asphalt angrily shaking beneath me
To split wide open and fully swallow
Like my eager younger wild years
Looking for a chest to rest my head
To kiss lips and caress confessions
Descending to look up at and into
A plethora of changing angles and eyes
Lips bitten and smitten quickly departing
Leaving me even more so anxious
Glaring at the swinging arms of clocks
A paradox I've fallen in obsession with
To someday clean this filthy slate
And I feel the Earth start to quake
I'm ready to drink the Kool aid
Ascend beyond the shards of glass
That resembled the twinkle of stars
Knowing that I'll drift to sleep
To foolishly repeat the cycle
Until it's not a false alarm