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23h · 103
Love Blood
Deceptive poison kiss
Store you in a bottle
Rub you on my lips
Pinot noir spill stain
I'm going insane
Ogling intensely
You are acid rain

Deer in the headlights
You accelerate
Dent in your hood
Dead in the road

Curse the wind
You breathe deeply
Caress your face
To scratch your cheek
And enchant your lips
With Pinot noir stained
Poison kiss
1d · 27
Absence
Where has the time gone
Rushing down the shower drain
Watching night unfold into
Bitter brisk sunrise gazing
Cocooning myself in sheets
Waiting for it all to pass
Drowning in amber syrup
Choking on a compost pile
The regrets I can't discard
And in return longingly obsess
Sunrise take me to nightfall
I hate the time in-between
Hands go numb and
They get so cold
Waiting
I'm always waiting
For a day that I feel
Nothing
Hey man...
I'm vibing here
Basking in the dark side
Drinking in the new moon
Creating new cycles
Embellishing my rituals
Sweeping clockwise
Demonstrating gratitude
Deconstructing my psyche
Pinpointing when and where
The erosion turned everything
Into a dusted pile of rubble
Heart got into trouble
Weight of the world doubled
But soon decreased
When I got off my knees
And traveled deep
Into the twisted paths
2d · 272
Old Town
Leaves change
Feelings don't
No matter the time
Between forced visits
Leaves descending
Leaves decaying
Decisions to stay
Uncomfortable
It's been ten years
I'm a different person
All new cells
Untouched
But I feel the same
Disappointment
Discomfort
Soul decay
Fine lines
Leaves fall
Leaves change
I fled
3d · 23
Duality
I want nothing and everything

Immediately and simultaneously

A corpse and reigning king

****** and untouched

Serenaded but silently

Ignored but completely adored

Smoking a cigarette naked in your bed

And buried ****** in your back yard
5d · 42
Spiraling
I'm coming off the high of a massive low
Now everything gold has got to go
Because I'm ready to start dwelling
On past trauma and tears welling
Hit the lights before you abandon me
I need to spend some time with the enemy
Gazing into a florescent lit pane of glass
Examining the existence of this mass
Breathing and ready to fall asleep
Somewhere dark and very deep
No one can know this war is raging
Stop the small talk and engaging
This path is carved for one alone
My low voltage sadness zone
Maybe I'll be back in the spring
Take some time to nurse this wing
See you when the flowers bloom
Kept cozy in the darkness of my room
7d · 44
Ritual Sacrifice
Place me beneath the floorboards
When you've caused my blood to cease
Spirit soaring beneath the harvest moon
Tickled by the echoes of wolves crying
Splatters of blood in my open eyes
Your potion glistening on my lips
And I'll see you on the other side
When you're done manifesting
And your soul is ready for sleep
Together we will haunt and creep
Hand in hand both with cleavers
An Adams family tragedy
Kiss each limb before you sever
I'll see you soon
I'll see you forever
Sep 20 · 25
Georgia O'Keeffe
Johnnyqu33r Sep 20
I think I saw the woman
You will leave me for
I can see your reflection
Growing in her eyes
And I think she's a lion
And I know she is hungry

I think she will be your freedom
From having to slowly slosh around
These murky waters we let overflow
With your soft hand on my hard shoulder

I think I saw the woman
You will leave me for
I can feel you start to leave
And we are at a crossroads
Meeting in the middle
To burn all the roses
Sep 19 · 251
Pestilence
Johnnyqu33r Sep 19
I'm melting into liquid
And I'll spread like disease
There's a tremble in my voice
And a weakness in my knees
My mind is clouding quickly
And my eyes are dumb dull
I continue all while smiling
But my lobes have gone numb

When these floodgates break
No one will contain me
And this immensely scares me
Because I've been pretty strong
For what seems like too long

By the time I evaporate
It will be way too late
Poisoned all the water
Forty pills on your plate
Laughing maniacally
You'll dance in my storm
Release the charades
Destroy in a swarm
Sep 17 · 23
Dirt Road Love
Johnnyqu33r Sep 17
Sometimes I want to be a damsel
Tower door kicked down by a
Very tall strong knight with severe
Emotional issues and a beater car
Who gets a little mean after boozing
But buys me flowers the next day
And wraps me in his tattooed arms
Like I'm a rat and he's a snake
Who has a beautiful mind but forgets
That it's okay for him to utilize it
Slow dancing in the kitchen waiting
For his hot pocket in the toaster oven
Drinking coke from the two liter
Watching him do coke at the dive bar
Then fist fight some of the locals
Because they called me a *****
And he smiles with ****** teeth
Split open eyebrow where once
There was a piercing he had done
When he skipped school at fifteen
And then decided not to return
Because he was good at fixing things
And his uncle was a foreman uptown
Then he started selling drugs and
Writing country rap music for
His buddy who was on the up and up
But died from an injection gone wrong
Supporting his plans that fall through
But the light never dies in his eyes
And I make him a little mad for fun
And we settle the dispute in his back seat
Then we go to the diner for milkshakes
And he proposes right at sunrise
With a blue ringpop he was saving
For the perfect moment to arise
And I scream and tearfully accept
But I'm just not the damsel type
And my patience is wire thin
So this will remain a fantasy
A dream I visit on a whim
Sep 16 · 20
Mimicry
Johnnyqu33r Sep 16
I myself am an instrument
A trombone, a harp,
Sometimes a scalpel,
Serrated words slipping
From silky lips,
Kissing below the belt
Saxophone plays gently,
Doe eyed apology...
There's so many people to be,
And only one body
Sep 15 · 41
Reflection
Johnnyqu33r Sep 15
Is it crazy
     To be
        Content with simplicity?
I have partied til sunrise
                               Saw death at dawn
         Cried until I couldn't breathe
                             Loved immensely
             Parted ways with forever friends
                         Waded in sorrows sea
          And for now
I want to stay in
     On a Saturday night
   Alone with a movie
    To decompress
   And appreciate
Solitude
   And all the years it took
     To be comfortable with just myself
Sep 14 · 39
Small Town Motel
Johnnyqu33r Sep 14
There's a stillness here
A blackness in the air
Breath becomes rapid
Heart rate elevating
Alone in this town
That always is asleep

An icy chill trickles
From nape down
Into curved spine
Paranoia creeps
I'm being watched
I am not alone here

Arachnid fingers crawling
Candle blown to black
And the whispers meander
There is no air in this room
Only the past and her captives
Who wish to keep me too
It's spooky season y'all.
Sep 10 · 15
You
Johnnyqu33r Sep 10
You
I'd banish all of my possessions
To rest my face against your chest
Absorbing your sweet heart beating
Like a criminal cracking a safe
Once open I wouldn't take a thing
Just polish what was hidden away
And marvel at the museum
Relaxing beautifully beside me

After sharing with you my flame
I'd kiss your forehead and go away
Because to thine own self be true
And I only really crave the broken

I'd tuck your photo in my soul
Which has become quite the portfolio
Smiles to illuminate my sky
When I too find myself lost
And I wouldn't mind being lost with you
For a brief moment to fully unleash you
And slither off before the sunrise
To encounter someone else like you
Sep 9 · 82
Arcadia
Johnnyqu33r Sep 9
She sings of a place I've never been,
Nor ever plan on being, and I'm crying,
Touched deeply by a meandering melody
Forcing me back to a time before I was
Even aware that I could make it to thirty

Back where the most peaceful place I knew
Was a tree in the backyard of my parents
Off white colonial home that for so long
Just couldn't feel like a home to me
And I'd sob nestled in thick branches

Watching cotton candy skies go dark
And I'd prepare for another war
Wishing that it would all go away
But I'm still here and so is the tree
That cradled me and I made it to thirty
Sep 8 · 27
Twilight
Johnnyqu33r Sep 8
These dreams do not satiate
Slither in the darkness
To recenter and salivate
Cravings do not dissipate
But simmer after rising
Invasive imagery
Grinding hard into
Against the frontal lobe
With pleading eyes
Eager tongue flicking
Your scent lingers
Even after waking
Reaching out for
My dark phantom
Taking me to *****
And then leaving me
In Gomorrah
Sep 7 · 39
Hypothermia
Johnnyqu33r Sep 7
Am I cruel and unusual
For refusing his love?
Thrown on me resembling
A very heavy quilt, but
So cold such as snow.

Fingers against my flesh
And I couldn't find my breath,
Not in a fairytale romantic way,
Like being held beneath water
Unable to see the surface.

No one will ever love me
In such a way as he,
But my lips were blue,
And eyes were crashing;
Alone in his cold sea.
Sep 5 · 36
Editor's Notes
Johnnyqu33r Sep 5
Will they be intrigued
By the pages I've filled
High ratings and steady
Followers eager for more

Behind the scenes
No reliable jump cut
The dark nitty gritty
And showcasing my id

You saw what I allowed
My behaviour in a crowd
Endearing eyes and smiles
Clever phrases in coded piles

Will the raw footage suffice
I haven't always been nice
Before I knew this was a show
And forced my character to grow
Sep 4 · 255
Human Unkind
Johnnyqu33r Sep 4
Aggressive
The gravity here
Friction
Small fires
Intentional
Slow burn
Excruciating
Rough words
Debilitating
No mercy
Ruthless
Soul escaping
Ascension
Sep 4 · 110
Fire, and wax wings
Johnnyqu33r Sep 4
He said he loves me
And I know it's true
I'm deep blue
I too love you
Red embers
Remembering
Collected years
Long grass
Smoke rings
Cold stars
Fermented liquid
Conversations
No quarter
Connection
Understanding
Friendship
He said he loves me
And I know it's true
I love you too
Sep 3 · 17
La Petite Mort
Johnnyqu33r Sep 3
Took myself into Nirvana
Matters into my own hand
Visuals behind shut eyes
Curtain call
You're a star

Eager eyes
Sultry descent
Pale Adonis
To overdose
Belladonna

Took you into Nirvana
Golden ticket plus one
Hot honey drizzle down
From heaven into my mouth
Into my little death
Sep 1 · 75
Curtains
Johnnyqu33r Sep 1
Tiny beams of
Light creep in
Through cracks and
Small tears
Old fabric
Protecting me
From sunlight
Blue skies
Warm breeze
Dandelion seeds
And I breathe
Tucked in tight
Watching
The ceiling
Doing a kindness
By
Staying the same
Sep 1 · 133
Lavandula
Johnnyqu33r Sep 1
There's been a shift in energy
Felt heavily in the crown area
Making the third eye cloud

It's all just very heavy
The balance we endure
Open eyes and closed doors

There's lavender in the cauldron
It bubbles and brings me peace
And very soon I'll fall asleep

To wake in a state of a calm
Hot water and lemon balm
To realize the haze is gone
Aug 31 · 29
Telson
Johnnyqu33r Aug 31
I saw a scorpion when I closed my eyes
And then reminisced on your sting
And how the venom wouldn't set in
Licked the wound and carried on
Because there isn't really a choice

Blue flashes of hypnotized eyes
Chemicals glimmer on your lips
And I ****** at your wound
Supple skin tasted like poison
And I refused to spit

Unwavering obsessions settled
Shook myself from that state
Cravings to be endlessly wanted
Subsided and the substances too
I run neither to or from you
Aug 31 · 30
I am a poet of loss
Johnnyqu33r Aug 31
I used to be a poet of love
Until I realized I'm not a lover
I'm a loner who's batteries had died
And selfishly I let someone hold me
Until I had fully become recharged
And now I'm just romanticizing
Men who have deep Earthy eyes
And a cornucopia of issues
For me to realize and dive inside
So that I may heal them
And they can leave me
And I can be sad for a while
And scribble poetry of loss
So come on and lose me
Aug 30 · 27
Infinite
Johnnyqu33r Aug 30
Diamonds are not forever
There is a wondrous black hole
Growing and gaining strength
And soon it will grasp onto
This spinning blue sitcom
And tear it all to shreds

This is the pattern of existing
Flushing of the goldfish only
Three days after winning it
From some rinky-**** carnival
Full of blacked out townies
And kids sky high on whatever

Everything will circle the drain
Which may sound depressing
But I'm radiating optimism
Because death brings rebirth
And a clean slate to tarnish
Once you've tasted the apple
Aug 29 · 23
XXX
Johnnyqu33r Aug 29
***
Flashes of color dance
Under the weight of want
Contorting until number figures
Knife to slip into like butter
I slide back into my fantasy
Not ashamed to admit
Guilt caught in the threshold

Young and radiant are we
Out in a field of fragrant flowers
Until we bloom and then we burn

Happiness found in release
A beautiful ancient art
Riled and ready to be submerged
Drenched in someone else's molecules
Aug 28 · 21
Chemicals
Johnnyqu33r Aug 28
How frayed is my sanity's string?
I'm afraid to guage the damage.
How long do I have to collect
And rearrange before it goes blank,
Scattering my formed thoughts askew?
Gravity exhausts the square knot
Tethering me to this in-between,
And I suppose I could float free
When I'm too tired of repairing
And moisturizing my rough hands
Scarred and tired from gripping,
But I guess it's all part of the point
Smooth sailing would be pointless,
Completely lacking inspiration
Unable to put pen to paper
Describing my relationship with
Cradling my disintegrating clarity
And one day falling through the Earth
Aug 23 · 21
Why, Asked The Owl
Johnnyqu33r Aug 23
Once upon a midnight stroll
Vines mimicked the letter O
At least nine feet by nine feet
An owl perched ahead to greet
And to deliver a harsh warning
But my curiosity was burning
So I forged forward and through
And entered a world completely new

And after gazing ahead in wonder
I turned to see my entrance no longer
Perhaps that bird was speaking truth
And I had no respect I was uncouth
Now trapped in a forest for all of time
With grass to roll and hills to climb
This trade has potential to be gold
I just hope it doesn't get too cold

My life had become so mundane
Saturated in bleakness and pain
I strolled deep in the woods to unwind
And perhaps as a blessing I did find
A place to escape and to be free
All future decisions are left to me
Had I the choice I'd never return
The bird knew the lessons I'd learn
Aug 22 · 14
Lux
Johnnyqu33r Aug 22
Lux
I don't want to be a lighthouse anymore
Attracting damaged travelers to my shore
Tending to a kettle and mending bone
Lending an ear to sad voyagers alone
Continuously cleansing with salt and ash
Awaiting another soul to crawl and crash

I want to destroy all the light inside
Put up a closed sign and quietly hide
Extinguish my demons alone with ease
Savor the cool fresh ocean breeze

I don't want to be a lighthouse anymore
But I will never quit and lock my door
For light never truly chooses to elude
Though endless seas taunt to conclude
So I will be the lost souls ampersand
As a bastion of peace and outreached hand
Johnnyqu33r Aug 20
Maybe I can
Place my crazy
On the shelf
Get a script
Seroquel

Decorative
Glass box
Sadness coffin
Take a shower
Pack a bag

Decompress
Divorce depression
Take a hiatus
Bathe in flowers
Breathe

My head
In his lap
Long weekend
Small cottage
Oceanside

Sensation
Returning
Fog clearing
Mouth to mouth
Fornication
Aug 19 · 31
Revoke
Johnnyqu33r Aug 19
I don't want to be your last love
I'm just a filler in your timeline
A collection of memories to visit
Smile and then snuggle deeper
Into the arms of the one for you

I'm not the one to meet you at the alter
Flowers cascading and bubbles rising
Buttercream three tiered fruit filled
Smeared on a gleaming grin ear to ear
Dancing to soft music as sun rises

I don't want to be your last love
My butterflies have all passed away
I'm just lingering waiting for the chop
For you to realize that I just am not
The one you will end your story with
Aug 18 · 106
The Sky Is Falling
Johnnyqu33r Aug 18
Can't shake this dismal dreary feeling
That finally everything is crumbling
Not sweet like a fruity baked confection
But asphalt angrily shaking beneath me
To split wide open and fully swallow
Like my eager younger wild years
Looking for a chest to rest my head
To kiss lips and caress confessions
Descending to look up at and into
A plethora of changing angles and eyes
Lips bitten and smitten quickly departing
Leaving me even more so anxious
Glaring at the swinging arms of clocks
A paradox I've fallen in obsession with
To someday clean this filthy slate
And I feel the Earth start to quake
I'm ready to drink the Kool aid
Ascend beyond the shards of glass
That resembled the twinkle of stars
Knowing that I'll drift to sleep
To foolishly repeat the cycle
Until it's not a false alarm
Aug 17 · 42
Recent Travels
Johnnyqu33r Aug 17
I'd be lying if I said I didn't at least wish
For things to be a little different
But I chose each of these paths branching
And sometimes I want to weep
Alone in the forest with the willows
But I sigh deeply and alone
In a mountain of soft pillows
So I suppose things could be worse

I know so many more sunrises are coming
And there's still time for transformation
But it's hard to rise and not want to sleep
And these molehills seem so steep

I'd be lying if I said I have been content
There's just no excitement anymore
I used to be vibrant neon sweet
Now I feel like a box of stale cornflakes
With an AARP discount on the back
A water damaged readers digest
Scrambling to try and find the cool me
In this sea of melancholy poetry
Aug 15 · 33
I am Earth
Johnnyqu33r Aug 15
Because the landslide brought me down
But it's okay for I'm made of Earth
Taurus is my sun sign but I moon bathe
In Aries which didn't make much sense
Until I realized how much I love candles
But I rise in Capricorn which is perfect
I find myself almost always grounded
But my Venus is in Cancer waters
And I wade in dark emotional pools
Where there's room for more than two
I traded champagne for soda water
Because my soul began to drown
But I'm decorated in crystal jewels
And my lair is filled with soft warm
Candles glowing and dry dead flowers
Stacks of books and spiritual statues
Keeping true to my astrological identity
Because the landside brought me down
And other than stars I am Earth
Aug 10 · 20
Tsunami
Johnnyqu33r Aug 10
Sea to share the shore
But she's a sociopath
Skillfully she shimmers
Sways and slithers

He didn't see it coming
That great wall of water
When she averted his eyes
To a wondrous pastel sky

Sea submerged the shore
Secretly and sneakily
Sinking ships and scenery
A wet and salty cemetery
Aug 4 · 147
Forecast
Johnnyqu33r Aug 4
I follow your dark cloud
Never bringing an umbrella
Saturated in all of your sadness
Shaken by your thunder bursts
Shocked when you get electric
And pushed aside in your gusts
I'm sure to most it may seem odd
Just extremely harsh and exhausting
But to all those who find me mad
You've never seen his light shine
Gently spread over a meadow
Or heard his booming laughter
Or basked in the warmth of his smile
Or have had his fingers in your hair
So I follow his dark cloud
And walk through all his storms
So that I may lie down in the grass
And drink in all of his warmth
Aug 3 · 51
The World
Johnnyqu33r Aug 3
Prophecies in the scrying mirror
Something had gone totally awry
I'd taken the wrong prong in the fork
And have been obsessively wondering why
My dreams and intentions were simple
Build a galaxy and life with my love
But he was just a crow painted white
The peaceful milky shade of a dove
This dream must come to a flat line
A ****** from within must ensue
This secret depressions gone on too long
A rewiring and new outlook is due
Aug 1 · 41
Enunciation
Johnnyqu33r Aug 1
I wish I were your lip balm
To glide across those dusty rose
Pillows resting on your face
Pursed and speaking gently
Of something I have no clue
Because my eyes are glued
On the twists and curves
Syllables and alliteration
Feeling the passionate punctuation
And then you smile and I wish
That your teeth were crooked
So I could be your braces
And then I wish that you were naked
So I could be your clothes
And then I wish the Earth was destroyed
So that I could be your home
Jul 30 · 39
Graphic
Johnnyqu33r Jul 30
Vivacious splashes of blue red
Tossed over the two dimensional
Glossy finish with words encircled
Knives slashing and guns ablaze
Hair haphazardly in her face
Kiss of death somehow escaped
With cries exiting like winter lace

My pen creates worlds described
Turns the ugly truth into a blushing bride
Combines my self hatred with my pride
Where my serotonin ignites and dies

Strokes to enhance realistic emotion
Highlights and deep heavy shading
Precision in twisting finger tips
Somehow creating the wet on lips
Directing the flow of movement
Birthing entire scapes from lines
Poetry in the flexing wrist
Jul 28 · 379
Imaginary Friends
Johnnyqu33r Jul 28
Sprawled out in my skin
Hair cascading softly
Over black silk pillows
Gazing off into and through
The ceiling flickering from
The candles waltzing
To Chet Baker singing

Fantasies compiling
Eyes slowly closing
To reopen transported
Champagne and petals
Vintage leather jackets
And black boxer briefs
With air dark and sweet

Fingers caressing
Lips tasting and exploring
Bliss in a California king
A variety of beautiful men
Adoring and pleasuring
Lounging in a sea of lust
Forever playing make believe
Jul 25 · 67
Blues
Johnnyqu33r Jul 25
To have it all and
Pretend to be content
Uncomfortable
Behind walls
Self constructed
Constricted

Autopilot,
Sincerest smile
Removed and reused
Constantly recycled
Carefully Rehearsed
Exhausted

Chemical imbalance
Shadows shifting
Internal conflict
Overstimulated
Collecting control
Repeat upon waking
Jul 23 · 351
Astral
Johnnyqu33r Jul 23
To drift
Be taken far out
Brought further into
Subconscious
Slew of symbols
Color coded
Neurons colliding

Sever
To untether
Physical form
From spiritual
Deep inhales
Counting down
Vibrations

Hey,
I'll see you
Out there
In shadows and
Swirling cosmos
With three eyes
And bright aura
Jul 22 · 154
Thirty Days
Johnnyqu33r Jul 22
Pressure,
It interrupts my sleep
And hides diamonds
Deep in it's womb

Only darkness
Like the quaint
Colonial home
My anxiety squats in

Pressure
Washing the walls
Opening the windows
Evicting this despair
Jul 22 · 27
Don't Leave
Johnnyqu33r Jul 22
Completely chaotic
Freeway after sunset
Collection of stars
A procession of scars
Still glistening with
Menthol chapstick
From hours before
When he wasn't alone

Completely prepared
To descend hastily
Into the strobes
Air whooshing by
Howling as if to mock
To invite maliciously
To satiate the hunger
To fully eradicate

He spoke often softly
Of this phantom sickness
Blackening the day
Molesting the future
Ruining his plans to stay
Completely chaotic
Freeway after sunset
Into the strobes
TW: self harm
1-800-273-8255
Jul 21 · 158
Soular flare
Johnnyqu33r Jul 21
The end of wick and wax
Swirl of smoke dissipating
Unseen due to the dark
Now enveloping the room

Two bodies entwined
Only one is sleeping
Only one is reaching
The other has collapsed

Decorated in bruises
Almost all of them unseen
Almost all of them internal
Unfixed by ice or sleep

The end of wick and wax
A soul is slowly separating
From underneath the sheets
From the grasp of it's mate
Jul 19 · 25
Red Room
Johnnyqu33r Jul 19
Aspirations to have you
Knelt with eyes gazing upward
Amber spheres glistening
Into my eager pools of blue
Using time as a tool to tease
Temperature rising by degrees

Tongue out from open mouth
Waiting to touch and to taste
Anticipating commands to please
To rise from jittery knees
Creating number mimicry
And then decorated in knots

Your body to be my paradise
My bed to be your home from home
Where passion and pleasure
Meets cotton and leather
Red rosy lips and an *** like fire
It is heaven to even desire
Jul 18 · 409
Last Call
Johnnyqu33r Jul 18
Mouth agape
Wisps billowing
Drunk howling
Running man
Two step
Electronic pulsation

Eyes fixated
Silver glamour
Wet pout
Hands reaching
Hands grasped
Lights flashing

Hands dropping
Lower back
Smooth talking
Expensive cologne
Neck kisses
Uber ordered
Jul 17 · 24
Hour Glass
Johnnyqu33r Jul 17
Feeling simultaneously
Too early and too late
Sat in an uncomfortable center
With skin young yet sketching
Plucking a wild grey strand
From the lush amber cascading
Caught in deep pulsing thoughts
As to if I'm closer to the start
Than to the finish line hiding
Crouching out in the open
Just waiting to ******
Another berry from the vine
Completely stressed out by time
But relaxed come the morning
To watch a few more lines
Climb this timeless expanse
To ponder this all again
In an endless cycle
Like the infinity sign
Jul 13 · 53
Sacrilege
Johnnyqu33r Jul 13
Fixation
False prophet
Following
Sweating
Showering
Salivating
Submissive

Clutch your cross
Getting nailed
Deep breaths
Derailed

Worshiped
Leather licked
Rebuked
Invoked
Delivered
Baptized
Kept
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