It has been a while since my lips uttered words of wisdom.
My mentality changed once you broke me, My words unable to escape my mind with the absence of your soul.
I lived with death on my mind and a heavy heart weighing me down to my inevitable demise.
After my death came I realized that you werent the cause of my downfall, it was my mentality that rushed the destruction of my beautiful heart and words.
So I said goodbye to the poetry spoken before my death and introduced a mentality of solidarity.
Love, why do I even try?
Love, was 'shown' while I matured.
Love, what the **** did it become?
Love, I run from you.
Love, It has been torture.
Love, was given as a false hope to me and every child ever born.
Love, Was false since the first time your parents held you.
Pain is all it brings by the hatred in this forsaken world.
Love endangered me, but you were the cause of my extinction.
You blinded me into a trap of self decimation.
I screamed in agony of you leaving me. Thinking I’d be lost without you leading me.
So I pled you not to leave, but you did and now I lay crying your name hoping to turn back time and change my mistakes.
I can cry.
I can scream.
I can feel hell fall upon me without a minute to waste.
I can feel pain absorbed over the years of being condemned to this forsaken world that cares none for me.
I loved, I felt... I tried to love you best I could.
I ended up destroying myself.
who am I to say that I care?
who am I to say I LOVE?
I changed my mind in a second, when I thought of you, I realized I wasn't in love.
I just felt lust
And On command I was done, Done caring, Done loving and needing
I felt abandoned. I walked past you and felt pure hate.
Not once did you flinch when I screamed your name.
Did you leave because I wasnt enough? Or was it because I no longer matched the image of myself in your mind.
Love was the death of a man stronger than his own pain.
Unknowingly he continued to love hoping it’d be the savior of him.
I destroyed who I was in order to love.
I gave everything I could in order to keep you happy.
I gave everything to make you smile.
I loved with my heart.
Never put mine before yours.
I'm drained, I'm lost.
I am no longer who I was.