It says something about myself
that I see death in dawn rather than a sunset.
That the emergence of life and light means a finality.
That the stilling of the world and its residences is a new beginning.
Is it that I see myself as a predator?
Emerging at night to stalk the metaphorical woods of humanity.
Maybe it’s more simple than that.
On the lonely beaches,
illuminated by the twisted reflection of the moon on the water,
in the 24-hour diners
with a woman perpetually smoking a cigarette at the register
and a tweaker passed out in a booth, holding his partners hand,
under the pervasive neon lights of dying bars,
bearing witness to the drunkards mourning love and liquor lost,
through forlorn streets, under dimly sparkling lights,
maybe that’s where I find myself at home.

To anyone who ends falling in love with me:

If I could have a sign in front me at all times it would read “warning now entering dangerous territory. Turn back now” in bright red lettering. It may even have a ****** hand print just for added dramatics. You should not ignore this sign. However if you are interested in me you probably are going to elect to disregard this very obvious warning so these are some things you may want to know going in to this;

If you have ever come across a road block you may understand what it is like to fall in love with me already. It is frustrating, and will ruin your day, and you will most likely end up having to take alternate routes and a little extra time just to get to know me past a surface level.

I will never apologize for who I am as I am aware of it already, I know my faults as well as my strengths and I embrace them whole heartedly.

I am like brick wall behind another brick wall behind a titanium door. Which roughly translates to I am stubborn as hell and don’t plan to change that.

My tongue is smooth and sweet like honey, I can sway you, change you, make you, or mold you with just a few words that will taste like a spoon full of sugar but burn like cheap ***** and regret.

My family will always come first, end of story.

You will find yourself asking questions constantly, you will wonder what I’m thinking and you may find the courage to ask but know that you will find that you leave with more question than you started with and no real answers.

Know that my tongue may be sweet and soft but it is also sharp and can hurt you, it can leave you tattered pieces of a man before you even know it.

I don’t open up easily, I am a safe with a lost combination. I am like that book from Harry Potter that attacks him when he tries to open it. It will take blood sweat and tears to make me tell you anything about who I really am.

You will wonder why I love sunlight so much and you should know that it is because I am cold, skin like ice and the heart to match. But if I am the arctic, you must be global warming. However in our case I’d like to think that global warming is less about killing innocent animals and more about melting the ice to find something new, undiscovered, something from before your time.

And I’m sorry that falling for me isn’t easy, in fact its next to impossible, but I will be even more sorry to see you give up. Because you will never find another girl like me, you won’t find anyone as exasperating as me, or as ridiculous as me, but you also won’t find anyone who will make you feel the way I do, you won’t find someone who will love you like I will.

And if you STILL aren’t listening to the **** sign tear it down, make a new one, write your name in bold and underline it, trespass and find out that you life is about it change.

From
Love
Bitter
Becomes
Sweet