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I know very
Well that
I haven’t been
The greatest
At love,

I haven’t chased
Grand gestures or vows,
But stumbled through
The mornings after,
The movie dinners,
The silences
Between us
Where love sits,
Waiting to be noticed,
Not a princess in a tower
Waiting to be saved,
But just two people,
Trying to stay close
Despite the gaps.

I don’t know if
I’ve loved the
Imperfections,
I’ve loved despite
Them,
The realization hits
Like a slasher movie,
Too late at night,
And too young
And unsupervised,

Sometimes I leave
Notes hidden in
Vases, behind cabinets,
Above the fridge,
And in the pockets
Of the new jeans
That I just got,
As a reminder to love,

Today I found one
In my glove compartment,
It’s getting cooler so
I rolled down the windows
And felt the breeze
Every time there was a red light,
I had the music loud,
Enjoying the mess of genres
That’s my Spotify playlist,
And I savored the moment,
In solitude, learning to love,
Not despite, but because of.
her face looked at me
from all sides and corners
of the writing paper
gentle as a ghost's reminder
I heard a subtle whisper say
There are no more
beautiful and clever things

And like the night
when the sky fades
I am ripped into my own desolation
and stirred into the agony
And as i see your face in everything
It's the most beautiful and clever thing
Rock-

a-bye-baby
My little brother, a new friend maybe

He grew up quite different than me
Are similarities were hard to see

Recently we found some common ground
Our relationship may now rebound

Spending more time with him
at a new climbing gym

I went rock climbing with my brother
I wouldn't have gone with another

The task to rebuild seems so steep
but its worth it so I will keep

Climbing
family is what is really matters
the fire at the corners of my eyes -
- smoke billowing -
- make blinking that much harder -
- once in awhile ash collects in an iris -
- a promise to burn things -
- blind.
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