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My father walked me down the aisle,
But my mother held my arm.
He went with me,
But we went not towards the altar,
But towards the door.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And the ***** rang through the church,
Humming through the elaborate crown molding,
Carved by my ancestors.

He went,
Not beside me,
But before me,
And I watched,
As he was illuminated by the bright,
Overbearing,
Texas sun.

My father walked me down the aisle,
But I did not wear white.
My father walked me in silence,
And I shed tears not for a man standing at the altar,
But for the one I would never see again.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And no veil obscured my face.
All eyes were upon me, but not for my pristine beauty,
Instead for my clenched jaw and furrowed brow,
Severe and fierce to distract from my glassy eyes.

My father did not leave me at the end of our walk to sit beside my mother.
She clung to me for support and sobbed breathlessly,
Loudly,
Unavoidably,
And I carried her with one hand,
My sister the other,
And walked towards my future.
A future family,
Not one person more,
But one person less.
I walked,
One final time,
With him.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And I will never forget it.
Hundreds of eyes isolating my family from the crowd,
Slow and muffled sounds drowning in the deafening beat of my heart,
Blurred faces staring,
Black heels clacking against the cobbled path from the church,
The anguished wails of my mother,
The whimpering of my sister,
And the wooden box that glided before us,
Pulling,
A string tied to our patriarch,
The pin key of our family,
Pulled taut and then snipped with the slam of the hearse doors.

My father walked me down the aisle,
Before I had a chance to grow up.
He walked me,
Out of the church,
Away from the altar,
Never to be walked again.
AND THE WORLD WAS AS SIMPLE AS SNOW

You are like all
the dark shops of my childhood
where you enter
with the little ****** of a bell

and the world blossoms
into a myriad of things colourful
to sell
stacked
in impossible & impeccable
order.

All yelling
shining
glinting
wild & glassy.
And the cash register singing
with the hard earned money
and the little ****** of a bell
lets you out again

into a world
excited with the falling of snow
& the palpable approach
of a Christmas when Christmas was Christmas
and the world
was as simple as snow.
The trees are now dark with the ash from our use to be love.
The water is now stained with the blood of our pain.
Our hearts now broken from what we thought would be forever.
"Once upon a time" turned into "We tried".
Now where do we go from here?
I see nothing but what we promised we're never be.
Don't you see?
We weren't suppose to be..
-D.
I was born in the "island of thieves",
but moved to "the city of dreams".
I started to learn to believe anything could be,
then I grew up and realized that the "island of thieves" is nothing but the ones who couldn't believe, who couldn't achieve.
They were thieves because they stole the dreams of another.
The ones who made it to the top, who never stopped.
They borrowed the hopes to one day not be a thieve, but to be a king.
-D.
I miss you, okay?
I miss the way the tip of your nose slid across my cheek..
I miss the way your lips softly planted kisses on my forehead..
I miss the way you held me in your arms as I fell asleep...
I miss our hands fitting perfectly together, how I felt safe..
I miss you and your ways, but they were right...
Now the fires out and I'm stuck in the dark thinking about you and your ways...
I miss you,okay? But the miles kept us away...
-D.
Five years ago today my whole world changed.
But somehow I'm still waiting like a broken doll waiting to be played.
I'm trying to hold on to what little remains;
Still waiting for that trip back in May.
Never forgetting that promise we made.
Now I'm realizing you're not coming back though,
But yet, I feel like an abandoned home at the end of the road.
You're missing all the roses that grow..
-D.
I'm over stressed and depression.
I have scars all over my arms reminding me of everything that could of been.
The days where I gave in, shut the world off and just kept to my self.
I can't breathe,I can't stand straight.I can't do this.
I gave in,I gave in to the sharp edges of my broken heart and held tight.
Slid deep and watched my ****** tears hit the floor of the unknown.
-D.
We go back & forth like some kind of war,
We can't get resolved; Don't think we want to.
We keep going back & forth like some kind of storm.
Thunder & lighting; Here we go.
I need you.
You love me.
We can't trust one another.
We can't live without each other.
Just say it,
I'll admit it,
I'll forgive but not forget.
You'll drop it but it'll always be in the back of your mind.
Why can't this storm just over?Why haven't we ran out of bullets?

-D.
I never wanted to be that girl..
I didn't wana keep thinking about you...
I don't want to keep crying over you..
You're like a bad dream.
You keep getting repeated in my mind..
I don't wana hear your voice anymore,
But you keep whispering all the things I wana hear.
You didn't give a **** about me,but "Baby I need you."
You never loved me,but "I can't imagine my life without you."
The memories of us keeping drowning in.
My sorrows are the waves...
My hope is my last breathe..

-D.
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