Talked to 3 girls in a row,
what a challenge!
Tried to not hold my breath,
but, I am still struggling to breathe.
I was trapped inside a desk, with no control of proximity.
I wish I could sink inside my soul and hide my insecurities,
I mean... I can... But.... I can't....
It's funny, but its sad, I'm supposed to be happy but I'm mad.
Frankly upset by the upset of chemicals in my head.
They're upset, frankly, with my odd manners,
hiding in the corner like a vampire.
You can hear the sentence rhyme with Tanner.

So lost... No finding me now!
I could have yelled.
I could have kicked and screamed until you noticed,
but you were in a conversation and seemed focused.
You haven't told me to value myself,
just to mind my manners.
Minding matters is exactly what i shall do.
Im practicing table etiquette in the desert,
shaking hands with cannabalistic tribe members.
I'm practicing addition while managing malnutrition. Im practicing dance moves while they're planning my extradition. I wouldve lived, but I  know I'd draw attention, so I mind my manners and head alone in the other direction.

I want you to be sucessful.
I desire a great life for you.
You like cop cars and firetrucks but they aren't right for you.

The sun is out. I feel the heat, the little bit that there is.



The rays aren't strong enough, I feel cold.



  Jumping out of windows, jumping off of truck steps



  while the drivers foot steps, on the gas pedal.



it is often that my tendencies are seen as suicidal,



we're comparable, pain is vital to our survival.



    No attention needed, there are no malicious thoughts in this empty silo.



No need for gifts or trips of extravagance as there is no happiness in this empty smile.



Don't play pretend with me, or pretend I do not see.



  I have empty eyes due to all I've seen, I have empty eyes from what you are showing me.



                    The past is the past, I look over my shoulder, glower at the world,



never will I turn my back.



Forgive never forget,



live never lie, this world is to small too fill these empty eyes.

I have nothing to do.
I feel hopeless, I wanna be motionless.
What is it called? Comatose?
Fold my thoughts like origami,
to keep me as a zombie,
the antithesis of a human body,
an empty shell.
Life is hell.
I yell it loudly.
No one hears me. I sing my sorrows softly.
What once was a cry is now a hymn that calms me.
Crawling like a zombie, dealing with insane body aches,
coping with brain aches, not well, I release control as my brain breaks.
Scared to have a child as I fear hes destined to face the same fate.
Pills under syrup on a pancake, minimum wage until you can't do it.
Staring at themselves in the mirror screaming just do it.
If songbirds only sung when they cried,
and only cried when they hurt,
and if I liked to listen, me or the world, who would be worse?