I would like to make something.
Something for you and me.
Something creative.
An activity.
What would you say,
With a good description.
Would be your perfect,
Society depiction.
Make a fun,
Meaningful fiction.
Of your personal utopia.
A place,
Of a happy place affliction.

You know racism.
Stereotypes.
But doesn't it ****.
When you realize.
That in the situation.
It actually fits them.
I thought it wasn't supposed to.
I thought it wasn't true.
But then again.
Why would they make them?
If it didn't happen?
Judging others.
Said to be a dumb fence.
But when it's true.
Does that mean it's an offense?
People of another race.
Are usually rude to me.
I am white.
Also Puertorican.
But who would think I was?
And who they was.
Isn't that unfair.
That they were what is thought as bad as a swear.
What can you do?
When bad stereotypes and actions.
Just keeps passing down.
It makes me frown.
Makes me feel like.
Being open-minded.
Is just a clown.
I don't like it when it's true.
It makes those people who say it is.
Not just a rue.
I am not going to be like them of course.
But it is annoying.
When it's as true as the source.

Yeah, I have thoughts.
Thoughts of people I have known.
I always go to far.
Push myself.
Farther under the bar.
It doesn't help.
That these fantasies are not good.
And would never be real.
It's not even something.
To I really appeal.
Other people have this problem.
And I would sob for them.
If I could cry more normally.
I knew about this stuff.
Ever since I was four.
I mean really.
It's pretty hard not to know.
Of things like a ***.
And so.
It may continue to go.
Even though...
I could try to stop.
I could stop.
I could let it drop.
Just ignore any feeling of that...sense.
And be as sturdy as some of a cop.
I will.
And you cannot judge that I used to.
Or do.
Because even though it's more private.
You probably do it too.

I found a few purpose.
Of course on purpose.
Finding the point.
I serve this.
Going through.
It's ******* me.
And probably you.
A lot of rough bumps.
Where is that thing?
That you said would lift me.
Out of the dumps.
Life is not a rave.
Tried to get a save.
Not a single wave.
Maybe I am just dramatic.
Just spastic.
Really a brat.
Never something fantastic.
Spoiled.
Personality foiled.
Negatively coiled.
Always wanting change.
An embarrassing derange.
Looks like a mange.
I am sorry.
I say it so much.
A say it bunch.
I say it every time.
I have a hunch.
Every time.
I don't eat lunch.
It shouldn't mean anything.
I have used it to much.
Boy who cried wolf.
Boy who sorry sing.
But I am sorry.
Maybe I really am black and white.
Not insightful.
Maybe they just never laugh.
Not out of spite.
But because they are right.
I am not funny.
I am irritating.
Too hyper.
Hopping to conclusions like a bunny.
My actions.
My thoughts.
I can say are really not sunny.
I would pay my whole life's worth.
Of future money.
If I could escape.
The personality that runs me.
But instead.
I must be searching.
For where my future.
Is now perching.
How to ignore.
Thoughts just lurching.
What else can I do?
Then make entertainment.
For me and for you.

I am sometimes offended.
Though I feel I am not supposed to be.
When it is said that may perspective.
I full of negativity.
When they say I am closed.
To social activity.
They say I am black and white.
But if I have time.
I can show what really lives in me.
An insightful, peaceful soul.
Or just a different personality.
I am 90% sure.
This is just now my reality.
Actuality.
I have a calm side.
I just need time.
I didn't think I had a problem.
In previous therapy.
And in the most recent one.
I just wanted to not follow insanity.
Trying something again and again.
And expecting a different result.
At least, I am not going to expect a better result.
I don't want to waste time.
Trying the same method.
Crying to the failure of method.
Though I don't cry anymore.
Saying I don't have more then one perspective.
Is only true in the moment.
Which is only sometimes true.
This false accusation.
Anytime my tone.
Anytime sarcastic.
Smart alack or spastic.
I wonder if it's just a rue.
To get me in trouble.
Put me in more rubble.
I am only annoying.
When I am bored.
Floored.
Or my mind is thrown overboard.
I like isolation.
The peace of disconnection.
Because I don't have to deal with.
The non-pleasant and helpful content.
In my surroundings.
It helps not burst from stress.
From the constant press.
My calm is more.
My hyper is less.
This does not mean I am not extroverted.
Social.
Or introverted.
It is my relief.
In the form most converted.
I have other options.
This one is just more enjoyable.
Electronics.
Since I was four years old.
This is better then some.
And does not make me a ***.
I am not dependent.
Obsessed.
Addicted.
Saying that.
Makes me offended.
I just have a positive relationship.
With technological companion-ship.
Gaming.
Music.
I am not feign to it.
Now, this is just to explain for the problems and complaints.
That way I can stay in my happy paints.
Although I do actually wonder.
If I am cocky, arrogant, or seemingly too self confident?

I feel.
It is unjust.
To only provide a child.
With distrust.
When it is not their fault.
They want privacy.
Or an escape.
From society.
I feel.
It is unjust.
To limit.
Their own de-stress.
Their only bless.
Though I must confess.
Some of these.
May not be what is best.
Or match.
With the moral attest.
But if it doesn't hurt.
Then it is only fair.
To trust in them.
To be aware.
Of the difference.
Between addiction and obsession.
Versus just an affection.
No matter what activity it is.
As long as it meets moral standards.
Then it should not be called upon.
With distrust and interference and somewhat offensive comments.
About the simple biz.

Another year.
Then another 4.
I start tommorow.
I'd rather kiss the floor.
They ask if I'm excited.
Oh I just wanna soar!
What do you think?
That I have actual friends?
Well now that depends.
All I have are fake friends.
Nobody to hangout with at ends.
I am so social look at these sends!
I just try to get by.
All I want to do is say bye.
All I can do is lie.
Because I can't get out of this.
This waste of time.
Hit me in the head with chime.
I still won't be positive.
This is not how I want to live.
But I don't have control.
Control of what I go through.
It's as terrible as coal.
Why do I need to do this?
It is honestly useless.
Education is unbearable.
My peers are not standable!
I am going through torture.
I could learn so much easier alone.
I know it help my future!
If you changed this stupid tone!
That I listen to everyday.
Annoying so much that I pray.
For an online course take me away.
This is dumb.
This is wrong.
To put kids through this for so long.
This is how real life is huh?  
I get told that all the time.
But it doesn't have to be this way!
We could see a better day!
Just fix education please.
It brings me down to their knees.
And doesn't let me rise.
You wonder why it's mostly cries?
Complaing?
Lies?
Explaining?
Because this stuff can't fit true needs.
Needs to make thing easier.
More efficient.
Breasier.
More enjoyable done.
QUICKER!
That's a positive for my happy sun.
I don't need more assignments.
Just more assistance.
I want to be witness.
To this simple change.
Before I become.
A complete derange.