Being alone
Cold summer showers
Clean shaven legs
Falling asleep
Feeling validated
Feeling loved
Finishing a good book
Feeling the cold wind run through your hair down your spine
Hot baths after a hard day
Silence
The warm sun on your skin
The smell of rain
The first sip of coffee
The sound of trees in the wind

I am happy when the sun is on my face
I am happy if I see someone being kind
I am happy because having a good conversation is as good as magic
I am happy for those who are honest to themselves  
I am happy to help someone in need

It has taken me twenty years to come to the conclusion that
I am worthy of love
I don’t need to change the parts of me I wish were different to have a conversation
Kindness is a right not a privilege

I do not need to starve myself to deserve love
I do not owe you the skin off my back
I do not owe you size zero
After all this time I know now that I am worth the stars and anything less isn’t worthy
Shrinking isn’t nessacary
Plastic isn’t real
Dreams are true and stories must be cherished

It has taken me twenty years to see myself through eyes of kindness
To realize that care and attention are two very different things
Love and lust are twins most can’t separate
Romantics buy flowers not only when times are tough but when their hearts are full
Car rides at night soothe my soul
Love holds no bounds it’s forms are always different
Looking up can be the difference between living and watching
I am ready.

Today I am every sad lyric ever sung
My heart drums so slow I wonder if I am alive
Check one
Check two
I am so small I could fit into the palm of your hand without you ever noticing
I am lost CD’s you forgot you had  
People sing of summer and tender first loves
I am neither of those
I am soft whispers at midnight with lips so close I can taste your words
There is no need to sing from rooftops when right here is enough but you insist quiet loves aren't real
So I get smaller

Road trips in january
Running my hands through your hair on february 14th
Holding your hand in march
Surprising you on your birthday in april
Pancakes in bed all may
Reading in the grass on a hot day in june
Making the bed in july
Unmaking the bed in august
Sleeping in september
Haunted houses and horror movies all october
Crying all november
Coffee shops in december
Loving you always

Once I wished I was was bird
Black and blue
I wanted to fly across the world and build a new life
I dreamt of letting the wind sweep me away carrying me wherever it wanted
In my dream I was wild and soft
My will was the only reason my feet ever touched the ground
The days were warm and I was free from worry

I still wish I was a bird sometimes, only now I want to fly to the tops of mountains and look out at the world in wonder.

April smells like change
Leafs turn golden brown and the sunshine feels like a warm smile
April whispers sweet secrets to me
Her laugh is kind and makes me think of clouds
She wraps her arms around me and all at once I feel safe
Fall is coming and soon we will grow apart the way roots do
Tonight the skies will cry for us as we speak of the future
Tomorrow when you walk away I will say goodbye with a full heart