Love, happiness and contentment.
I watch my friends experience these emotions whilst I search my soul for any feeling other than emptiness. My body is present but my mind is absent.
The room is full but I’m more alone than ever.  
I stare at the blank walls around me and realise that I’m staring at my own reflection.

I’m all alone and cold inside this invisible prison
But I’m my own worst enemy, trapped inside my visions
Thoughts run through my head and keep me from my sleep
They haunt me, they scare me, they are far too deep
I lie silent under my covers, screaming inside my head
But no words leave my lips, so I won’t leave my bed

Lifeless weightless and silent I drift through this never ending void
Trying to figure out how I fit into this impossible puzzle
All hope I had has disappeared with my youth
This great sadness consumes me as I have realised that this is it
this is life
And it will never get any better
These are the good days we are told
before we grow up before we get old
But if my life is worthless during this period then do I deserve to go on
Do I deserve to live a happy life with a happy wife
who cares about me and loves me during the night
Or do I deserve eternal sadness all alone
with no one there expect the love from my phone
I have nothing left I’m consumed with fear
I just want happiness but I know my end is near

The sadness in my life is the only thing that is consistent
I feel so alone, so lost, so sad, and so distant
I have days where I can do it, days when I’m good
but then sometimes I feel so down, so useless, misunderstood
I need another person, someone to burden with my pain
If not then I could crash, i fear I’ll drift out of Lane
And to change lanes at this speed would be such a disaster
so to avoid this I have to speed up, I have to go faster
I must brush everything under the rug, grab the wheel and keep going
I need to stay strong, let my feelings build up without showing
I see my friends laughing but I can’t even force a smile
All I want is to feel okay, just feel normal for a while
I keep chasing the feeling of feeling nothing at all
There’s no one I can turn to, no one I can call
My only relief is when I’m far too numb to feel
As I get to escape this scary world to a place that isn’t real
How can we be happy when we can’t cope, we can’t deal
What even is happiness? because it’s something I don’t feel

I’m what you want I’m what you need
We’ve been here before so on me you feed
You rip me open and eat me up
I’ll fill you for a while but I’ll never be enough
Once you are done you throw me away
I’m empty inside, here I lay

Too many thoughts, too many things I feel
I feel so lost, I don’t know what is real
Im happy but yet so sad how does this end?
Why do I feel so alone when I have so many friends?
I just want to run away and escape but i have no where to go
I hate feeling like this I hate feeling this low
I just want to feel better and enjoy my life
I feel trapped, caged up like everything is out of sight
My mind is broken when did everything go wrong ?
Im on the edge of breaking down I’ve been like this for so long
I’m searching for eternal happiness in the dark
How can I fix this feeling of emptiness in my heart
Why is it when I want to sleep my thoughts are nocturnal ?
I think this is the end I fear my sadness is sempiternal

I want to take off, float away
I don’t want to face the world today
My thoughts have taken I’m beaten they’ve won
I’m not the same person I was when I was young
Back when things weren’t so intense
I can’t cope hanging onto this suspense
Am I going to make it? Will this stage ever end?
I need some hope, some love anything to help me mend
I’m broken, defeated, lying here dying
But I’m too strong to show, I’m too old to be crying
So I keep it all inside which only makes it worse
But I’m reaching boiling point and one day I’m going to burst
And when that happens I’m scared to think
Will I be here the next day, I’m on the brink
I will feel better one day I’ll get past this feeling
But untill then I’ll stay lying in my bed trapped, looking up at the ceiling

It’s no wonder we are anxious, nervous, and depressed
When it matters not what’s inside but how we all dress
Being genuine and kind has been left in the dirt
New sought after traits have began to give birth
How much money do you make? Are those shoes designer?
Imagine if instead we were all a little kinder
But that gets you no where in 21st century life
Where money can buy you anything, even a wife
We constantly improve on our imagine but all it brings is lust
We are missing the important things, humility, love and trust
So if you find something genuine hold on with all your might
But be prepared for them to run away in the dark hours of the night
Because nothing lasts forever and love is included
What have we become?
A generation thats deluded

Reminiscing on the past will only lead to pain.
It brings sadness to our heart and doubt to our brain.
It’s easy to slip up, get lost in our own head.
Thinking back to good times had, whilst lying alone in bed.
Should we try to move on, block out our thoughts, and forget?
Or should we be grateful for the experiences we have gained, and the people we have met?
Materialistic lust leaves a lot to be desired,
I’m happy with the money I’ve spent and the experiences I’ve acquired.

I am silent
staring into my bathroom mirror
I see a faceless person with no worth, no purpose
I am lifeless
my characteristics have disappeared and only emptiness remains
the only life I see is the broken bulb flickering above me
I am numb
friendship, love, and lust have been replaced with loneliness
my mind is slipping into darkness with no means of escape
I am overcome
all my thoughts have taken over and swallowed me my self conscious has taken over
I am defeated
there is no hope for my survival as I am at war with myself and one of us must die

I am silent
staring into my bathroom mirror
I see a faceless person with no worth, no purpose
I am lifeless
my characteristics have disappeared and only emptiness remains
the only light I see is the broken bulb flickering above me
I am numb
friendship, love, and lust have been replaced with loneliness
my mind is slipping into darkness with no means of escape
I am overcome
all my thoughts have taken over and swallowed me
as I fight with my own self conscious
I am Defeated
there is no hope for my survival as I am at war with myself and one of us must die

For all the love in our hearts there will still be hurt
We follow our feelings until we end up face down in the dirt
For all the desire in our eyes we still struggle to cope
We involve ourselves in false love without any hope
For all the knowledge in our brain we still lack direction
We all fall at the first hurdle with the purest intentions
For all the people in the world we still lack compassion
We are too caught up in social status, money and fashion.