The ***-bellied Mercedes squealed
As Meursault withdrew and
Marvelled at the flames
Licking
The air
Like marigolds on Ritilin.
'Raymond would have no reason not to admire this act.'
He stopped by a shimmering sea of Ubers.
The scrape and drawl of siren made no impression on him.
Leaking smoke reminded him of
Snow White’s Cottage
Where he had taken Marie when Lucie was born:
The place where he would go out at dawn to chop wood.
He liked the way her roses played
With the restlessness of children.
Then he thought: 'if only mother could see me now.'

I can't turn the brightness down
It's winter now.

My cat cuddles up next to me
Like a cat in an anime would.

I pinpoint bubbles and styrofoam
Holding fractals of light like a table
The sun shines down as I catch the rays.

I try to talk about it all less and less these days
I've spent so much time worrying and wanting
And tonight I think about the
Girl gangs, squads
Where we would twiddle and twaddle
Forgetting and listening
Very little.

I didn't do my eyebrows back then
My hair starts to grow down the nape of my neck
I'm always worried about dolla bills.

I practice not needing so much
Painting in an array of responsibilities
I whistle and I wait
I whistle and I hope.

I'm not sure what for
But it doesn't really matter does it
Standing in the crowd
Or sitting at the bar
I paid for nothing but ubers last night
Blinking away the dust
Everything is a little different now

And that's just fine
That's just fine.

i fall asleep in the back of ubers, to the sounds
of middle-aged drivers talking to their loved ones
giving advice, the smell of spice, my temple on the window
just playing a mental jeopardy with the meanings behind
those accented words of languages i don't understand
perhaps, once upon a time, i did, but now, no longer

i sleep like a stranger in my own home, climbing
into my bed without caution, with atrophying bones
it's a debilitating exhaustion, it's characteristic of aging
of falling and forgetting about the friendships and benefits
that broke through my bed slats, plus the flash-lit attempts
to fix the unfixable with feminist texts and crumpled cash

i dream about my mother as another, and her neck
remains untouched, perhaps only adorned with pearls
so wide, and so bright, and the garage door is always unlocked
it's comfort, it's nostalgia, it's the furthest i've been from home
and when the radio turns on, i wake to unfamiliar laughter, and
"i miss my dog, and i miss falling in love," and everything's amiss
and all i can do is sit here, tipping a stranger as i reminisce

I'm trying
I swear I'm trying
Not hard enough
But the best I can
These city streets
Are re-paved
All the friends
You've known
Gone
What does it feel like
To see your city
Your friends
Your family
Bought and sold
Under tourist banners
Ubers
Lyfts
AirBnBs
And city planners
I'll tell you a secret
If you promise to keep it safe
The city is bought and sold
Developers dictate the rate

What Love commands the train fulfills*,

The six thirty bounds to Coney Island

Where the green Ubers awaits the passengers

Morning greetings, (Urdu) of few words, were the



Pakistan, rules Mermaid Street with the neon green

Were too mama? where too, two dollars:

A repeat routine for most of us,



Whether you’re a morning person or a night owl, we all start our day at some point. And we all seem to start it differently. (Kevan Lee)



Five forty showers, get dress out the door before six a.m.

Grab the garbage, and walk three to the subway,
where love commands the train fulfills, which lessened  

My morning depression until midday, (who control whom)



Why was I born, why am even here, what is my personal worth?

Timeless question, who would remember me, when I am gone?

The train, the cabbies, would the streets miss my dragging feet?

Self-observation, is it worth a Newyork minute of whom will miss us. (really)

Void, void, void, void, void, void, void, and more void,

Just allowed the few that might to do some adjustments

For the sake of remembering me, for the sake of losing my car fare,

For the sake of not receiving, my monthly fees, and T-Mobile

you definitely would, release me from my grandfather plans:



Today, I sit in silence, away from all sounds, only the sounds

Of a keyboard, and my heartbeat, as the mouse goes click, click

For the sake of remembering is that a poet is only good at recollecting, reflecting, and making his audience believes in his words:

I do like taking ubers
A little conversation

Only been there in the summers
But I like the Swedish nation

Istanbul for 3 weeks
Would be a nice vacation

I have religious torment
But cannot find salvation

Nature and human nature
Frightening the predation

Sometimes sweet such silence
Quiet elevation

This lengthy quarantine
Intensely isolation

Will I travel again?
Don't know.  For now it's just staycation.