Many people fear their past
They look back terrified
Ashamed
Worried it will repeat itself

I'm not sure I am
My past is riddled with darkness
It is millions of mistakes sewn into billions of memories
I have seen darkness
But I will not become
Darkness

I have laid down on cold bathroom tiles
Grasping for air and drowning in pain
I have bled myself out for a love I will never have
I have seen death
I have stopped death
I have watched friends fall into puddles of misery
Before my very eyes
I have woken in the beds of strangers
And taken my leave without a trace
I have been beaten to a pulp by a lovely friend
Who still insists she can't remember
I stayed home when they go out
Because I can't bare to see sunlight

But I will not become darkness
My past has no bearing on my future
Because I have also seen light
And it is good
Illuminating
But mostly just good