I've been awake for too long.
Sleeping every night you'd think I would've got the hang of it by now
But the last year, sleep has eluded me.

Now I sit pre-dawn hour.
Preparing myself.
Settling an upset stomach,
Turmoil of emotions.
A sea of anxiety -
Chaotically churning chyme
As time goes turning on.

Fooled myself that I was neutral.
That I would be happy no matter the outcome.
Yet, here I am. Sweating fear.
Like I'm out gun so I have to out run bullets.

Radical Critical Acceptance.
Is my only line of defense
Against the offense of uncertainty
No point worrying about what I'm going to be dealt - pointless action.
Deal me the cards and I'll work from there.

We're all **** in the new dawn.
Naked in our actions, our motives
All wanting a plethora of letters
In a hundred different combinations.

So as that sun rises
Like a single old wise iris
Dispelling it's light on me
I wonder -
what will today bring?
Either way, I'm certified that I'm leaving.