Even after all this time,
I still pray to you like some sort of God.

Half expecting to hear your answer in my head
Until I remember
I don’t believe in anything.

If I close my eyes tight enough,
I can still see the light.

Some sort of colour shining through
Against the backdrop of black.

Until I remember
It’s only leaking in from the outside.

Photons refracted against a hard surface.

Reflecting back beneath my eye-lids
Lighting me up like something holy.

Even after all of this time,
you still ******* haunt me.

Your specter lingers in the earth beneath my feet.
Sticking to my shoes as I try to walk away.

You are a poltergeist acting through me.

Making me think that you are everyone,
Everyone is you.
And love is just a mask you wear.

All the times I told myself,
that trust meant falling victim.

It was you
With your tendrils wrapped around my skull,
Whispering in my ear.

Under your skin.

Lies an undead relic rooted in beauty.
Submerging an eon of engravings within
This lake of repulsions.

Denegrating liquid
Giving shelter to the serpent: impermanence.

I bathe in a floral decay of interstellar emotion
Manifesting itself in your cellar door.

So tell the black rabbit that my eyes are still red.
And searching for clarity in this watered-down blue.

Electric paper turned to dust in a peaceful explosion of masochistic sheep.
Skinned to black bones, snapping.

As her chemical apocalypse settles in.

Falling asleep upon fallen stars under a dead floral sky,
shrieking in joy at the atom’s collapse.  

I hadn’t known chaos until you took my hand
And showed me how the world would end.

Will you please pin my shaking hands to the quivering universe and let me engage in communion? Because lately I have been feeling like a lonely colour in a soundless scape of unending sensation. Too weak to cling tightly enough for any whisper of permanence to latch itself to my soul before it gets caught in the door shutting on their technicolour fatalism. Let me tie my noose to the stars before they fall from the heavens in energetic heaps of light. I will tumble to the dirt alongside the hot white waste expelled from a realm where the gods will weep at the hedonistic horror disguised as modern drops of reality. Let me come to rest in the core, lie motionless among the charred remains of all that we once thought holy.

Let us take the world we see and construct
a relatively yellow alternative.
Apprehend ambiguous sunsets,
And sink into the pavement of the paper.

I cannot and will not be amazed. By
the glass, But become a fragment of it.
Be eaten by it’s watery presence.
A fragile door shutting upon a finger.

1.
Moon multiplied in panes of haunted glass
Renewed in rains long overdue of pink, peach and white.

Fragments floating in turbulent concrete towers
Reducing the million technicolour thoughts to dust.

2.
Blue and white limbs titillating upon destruction
Of the stark grey self succumbing to denegration.

The grandeur is singing as we unlock
The catatonic mistake that we have yet to make.  

3.
Destroying what we had known before the field
Caught fire in oceans contained within.
Her single, sulphuric transparencies.

Lie down to rest in remnants of a world refracted in
The artificial sunlight crying hymns of fabrication.

Misplaced curiosity in solitary places,
Where forlorn cubes eat darkness like ghosts
Graciously accepting fruit in exchange for a wandering eon.