So i fall and i break and i am swept off the ground.
You try and make me talk, but i can't make a sound.
I'm so stunned and so afraid and i don't know what to think of you.
What am i supposed to think about the things you do?
You make me so nervous. What will you do next?
What will we do with this huge mess?
I never thought things would be this way.
I never thought about the things you'd say.
Why are you like this? I don't know what to say.
I'd like to somehow see why you are this way.

What do you think
About the way i write?

What do you know
About the way i think?

What do you care
About the way i live.

Asking myself these things
I just think
And think
And think.
I don't know the answers.

But i realized  i don't care.
I don't need your approval.
I just need your love.

Who are you?
Are you the sweet boy that makes me feel the most unfathomable joy?
Or are you the heartless monster that never stops yelling?
It changes every day.
Make up your mind, you heartless wretch.
Cause i can't live like this anymore.

I feel like my heart is made of paper.
So fragile. So breakable.
I feel like i have to be so careful.
So hesitant. So untrusting.
I feel like my hands are so shaky.
So nervous. So empty.
I feel like my mind is so crowded.
So unsettled. So tired.

And i just want to let you know that i still think of you.
I don't think of you in the same way, but i think of you nonetheless.
I want you to be doing ok, but not for me. Just for you.
I want you to be loving your life, but not because i'm a part of it. Because you are.

Dear Universe,

Why do you have to be so amazing? And why Do i feel like one of the few who really notice it?

Light can only shine through a broken heart.
You can only know what it's like to love if you know what it's like to hurt.
You can only see the beauty in this world if you've seen all the ugly it has to offer.
Feel the joy.
Accept the hurt.
Try for love.
Hope for the best.