I had to let go of your memories
As I did with San Fransisco
With its innocent corners and places
The quaint stores and my shadow

"Does it snow in San Fransisco?"
My little nephew asked
"Not always, but it did long ago"
And my eyes filled with remnants of the past

It hasn't gotten easier, years have gone by
I still remember the golden gate
The sunsets and the pleasant sky
I need you still and in vain I wait
For you to stop by
And steady my pettish state

Seventy-four fast flights through sleek, black, breathtaking blocks cascading over the world
And the most beautiful sight I saw that day
Was you

My heart aches and I want to hate you for it.

I can't talk to you in fear that you are like Them.
We **** and you leave kiss marks on my blades but that's the closet I get.
I could lie in bed with you all day
I could lay in bed with you all day
I so badly want this but I'm choking on my own brain, and I don't know how to spit it out.

Taunting bones

poke through thinly stretched skin

bruising flesh like dropped apples

You sliced your finger-tip off

in the process of

cuting out the

core

If I asked you how I tasted you would tell me "like her"

You would say that I smelled like roses and felt like their petals and you would tell me that my arms held the most beautiful scars

You would ask me if I remembered the time you were happy and I would tell you no, but I'd ask you to kiss me anyway and to pretend that my eyes were her own

I'd sing you to sleep and you would cry because you thought you loved nothing more, but now it's never quite right
(nothing was ever quite right)

You told me you loved how I touched you but I knew my fingers were not the fingers you longed for and when you told me you loved me you were speaking to someone else

You taste like stale cigarette smoke, self loathing and bitter sadness and I want you know that I have always tasted the same