Hey
I know it's been a while
Since we've last both spoken.
I'm doing fine

                                            Except
I miss you sometimes
When I least expect it
I'm not really sure why
It's not like we were anything special
Maybe it's the look in your eye
In that one moment of vulnerability
When you tore off all the layers
Of protection
That you pull so tightly
Around you
Perfectly hiding you
Making you invincible from the world


Did that scare you?
That I saw that side?
Is that why you didn't call
Didn't leave even a note or an inkling
That you had the slightest interest
Or was your interest only for those few
Moments together


Like magic
Engulfing me completely
Intoxicating my senses
Filling me to the brim
With you and the possibility of more


More that will never come
Because you won't let it

I want you to know that I go
From spurts of anger to pain
When I think of you
And what we could have had
Sometimes I still hold hope
Before remembering
Stupid girl, it'll never work


You make me the highest of highs and the lowest of lows
And you don't even know it
Funny
Because I don't want you to
You don't deserve that
And at this rate you never will


Well this is getting long winded
And it's something you'll never see
Because really why would you?
You never even think of me!
So I guess it's time
To finish what I have to say
There's really nothing else
Other than
Goodbye

i step into the shower,
my hair flowing down my back

and i hear the bathroom door open and close
-click
           you enter

i ask if you're coming in,

           you pull back the curtain
and you stand there
like a mountain,
          absolutely majestic

your skin warm and inviting

i push my hair behind my ears

you step into the shower
                the stream hits your body

like a waterfall in Minneopa
in the middle of a hot summer day.

you lay three fingers against me,
like an electric current
screaming "I want" over and over.

You bend down to kiss my forehead,
the water spreads over your face

and rushes between my legs

             you kiss my lips

you place your remaining ******* on my waist

I snap back into place:
sitting in a hard plastic chair
listening to a short bearded man
go on forever
about some dead philosopher
who has never touched me.

and again, you are far away

If I wrote a poem for
      you
              every time you crossed
                 my mind
I would never be without a
           pen in my hand.

But as it stands
        my mind has stopped

   finding words to  put on
      paper

but my heart knows

how
       I feel

and how
                I think
about
     you

every time I
     take an order
             for a Left-hand
                     Milk-Stout
    at the restaurant
         where I now work

SITTING IN YOUR CAR WAS THE ONLY THING I KNEW HOW
TO DO DRUNK AT 2AM
YOU KNEW SO MANY GIRLS FROM
CALIFORNIA FROM RUSSIA FROM BRAZIL BUT NONE OF THEM
WERE ME
YOU SAID THIS AS IF IT WERE SUPPOSED TO BE FLATTERING
I WOULD FLAY THE SKIN FROM MY RIBS FOR ANOTHER DRINKI SMILE THROUGH GRITTING TEETH
THIS IS NOT WHERE I PICTURED MYSELF
AS A WIDE EYED FRESH DAISIED GIRL
WHO DRINKS FROM HER GRANDFATHERS FLASK
WHEN SHE THINKS NO ONE IS LOOKING
YOUR ONLY MISTAKE WAS DRIVING TOO FAR UNTIL
THE ONLY LIGHTS I COULD SEE WERE THE ONES BEHIND MY EYESWHEN YOU STRUCK ME SINGING
DARLING, LET'S GIVE LOVE A TRY
THIS WAS NEVER MEANT FOR YOUYOU THINK THAT LOVE LIES BETWEEN THE LEGS OF A GIRL
TOO DAMAGED TO KNOW NOT TO RIDE IN CARS
WITH BOYS WHO LOOK LIKE HER FATHER
I'D HAVE KISSED YOUR KNUCKLES WHEN YOU
MADE THAT FIST
IF I COULD FIND ANY COMPASSION LEFT IN ME

kiss my lips

kiss my hips

make me slip

head over heels for you

Kiss me
kiss me now
kiss me forever in the moonlight
kiss me wherever it feels right
just kiss me

That Kiss

That kiss that makes your knee's weak
That kiss that makes you want to freak
That kiss which no one could regret

have you ever had that feeling where you
don't know if that girl is the one until
you had that kiss?

That kiss that makes you miss her already
That kiss that no matter what you do,
you can't feel steady.
That kiss that just isn't kidding
That is the kiss my heart is feeding

Have you ever felt that feeling
of compassionate, soft lips touching you
gently and it all just feels right

That kiss of Continuance
That kiss of Love
That kiss of a princess
That kiss of affection