Blue is the color of the happy sky
Black is the night as it slowly passes bye
Yellow are the smiles that push up from the ground
Brown are the memories that chase me like a hound
Purple are the sunsets filled with lies
Green are the beauty in your eyes
Pink is ignorance I proudly displayed
Gray is the face of the sky today
Orange is the footprints you leave in your wake
Red is the blood from my wrists you take

Nothing last forever in a world so broken

Do you know how many words
Have fluttered from my fingers
Or fallen from my lips
And dance along my throat
That I can't recall
They fall into eternity
And maybe imprint in your mind
But they do not stay in my head
Like an important moment in time

To dream in color
And write upon her heart
To kiss the stars
Still so far apart

To lay with you
Amongst the shadows
Finding rest with you
Beneath the Hallows

So much sky
My eyes are lost in sight
I look only for you
In this dark night

For you my friend
Are the bright soul
With a light heart
That makes me whole

I'm trying!
Okay?!
I'm trying,
But I guess
It just
Isn't working
I will never
Be good enough
So I'll just go now
Have a nice life
Xoxo

Does the night remember our relentlessness
Here we drink, wine and stars
Intoxication of souls
Grains of salt, on sugar sweet lips
A taste of stars, for a black hole kiss
We die, the night goes on
To live one more day
Is to outlive all
The earth does not know
Nor will she remember
She bore you, conceived
Brought you forth
Out of the aching of her years
Turn your face
Lift your hand in anger
Were you not human once
Do you still hold your tongue
When angels speak
They crave your words
Your peace
There are no gods here
Maybe once, in an older day
Maybe once, when you knew their names
Passed from lip to lips
No more than a kiss
Their halls are empty
Fires burnt out
Smoke nearly touching the stars now
Their lungs are empty
Breezes settled
Will you quarrel with me here
Raise your hand against another
Lift your voice for a song,
with no words,
that you call anger
Give me up
To the sins of your head
Your heart dare not act out
I am worth these
And I am worth nothing
Change in your pockets
Will never make sense
You return me to the earth
This is your curse
Luna will call my name
Screaming it into the heavens
A voice falling only upon your ears
Turmoil and angst of your conscience
Your ears and neck burn
And you become one with regret
It will name you
Find yourself unable to utter any remorse
As it coarses like fire through your veins
This is hell, she is patient

Underneath the skies
Underneath the stars

*A eternity lies buried

This empty bottle has told me all her secrets
Still I hope for more
Like a thirst unquenchable

I tear away at myself
At everything that I have become
The lining of my lungs separates
And I pull her out of my throat,
and she slips through my teeth
As a ghost in the night
And a final breath
That had been spent to soon
She was told to wait
For the ticking of the clock to be silenced

These dreams, they cling
To the corners of my skull
Knocking together in the night
For warmth, for stamina
If each be just a drop of water
It is still enough to drown all else out

Like change in my pockets
Clutched between clammy fingers
And rings that turn my thieving fingers green
Are these memories I hold of you
I dare not let them slip through my fingers
Yet here I find myself
All spent out

These thieving fingers
Have stolen days
Stolen hearts
And left nothing in return
But two or three petals from a fading flower

Such is life
But to awaken each day
And to look for sleep at the end
Yet we paint our faces
With our bleeding, broken hearts
Oh some smiles, how red they are
Try as you might
You cannot wipe away the pain
So let it bleed
Until it has bled out
And still scars hold things together tighter than your hands ever could

You idiot
You thought I love you
You stupid boy
You thought I cared
Why would I love you
There is nothing there to love

Just leave me alone
Cant you see I am trying to ignore you
Stop getting in my you
You fool
How could I care about a nobody
Why would I care about you

Oh please give me a break
Get out of my face
For goodness sake
Please just move you are in my way

Stupid child
Just use your brain
Silly boy
Just think about it for a moment

Why would I care about you
Do you really think my world could revolve around you
Well to be honest it does my dear
And I will always be here have no fear
<3

you were right
paper is flammable
you were right
you set me on fire
you were wrong
because you said it would last
you were wrong
because it is all gone

Do you change shape to
Slipping through these days
Liquid dreamer
Faulty against lines in the sand
You have eight faces on a round head
Only irony would permit
Octagon facets of your expression
To reflect one another
If the earth could talk
Oh the stories she would spew
Perhaps she is the only true triumphant
Yet we press against her
Resisting the way she would show us
All the love she has given
Yet, race to the moon
Love to the blue stars in the black skies
Will we tarnish them too
When we reach where their light touches
Paying no respects, giving no courtesy
To light beyond our own
We are never satisfied, never happy
With where we are
We hate the journey, fear the end
Desire to burn so bright
Pushing the super in supernova past our thermosphere
When no one in this solar system cares
And as if any creature, animal, or vegetable
In the next solar system can see your flares
When nothing matters
What do you do
How will you burn
When the exosphere will one day pull to earth
Every atom we are composed of splits
Phosphate and nitrogen sin against each other
As if it was their first day in the garden
Knowing, time is our only true forbidden fruit

My ghosts know me
Better than your friends know you

You don't have to!
I know you want to
I know you try
But listen outside of your head
Cuz what is in there
Is a lie.

You are worth it
You are loved you
My ray of sunshine
From God above

Put it down
Let me hold you
You aren't a slave
No one sold you

You are your own master
It doesn't have to be faster

Whatever you want
Just please not this
Let nothing touch your skin
Unless its a kiss

You are blessed
With a beautiful smile
So put it down
Just wait a while

No one is like you
Nobody comes close
It doesn't matter
You don't need a perfect nose

You matter
So much in my heart
I will walk this journey, beside you
From the start

It's okay.
I know.
It hurts.
A lot.
But, my beautiful friend, that is all the more reason to stop.
You have self-control
Don't let a stupid piece of metal or flame
Take this toll

You don't have to pay
You owe no debts
So just wait a minute
Don't hurt yourself yet

Breathe in the air
It wont be your last
Let your lungs
Erase the past

Smile a little
At the corners of your lips
Feel the love
Like a gentle kiss

Atleast one person
Doesn't want you to cry
They want you happy
Your eyes to be dry

And if you cant think
Of a single soul
Who doesn't want you broken
But needs you whole

Let me be
Your sweetest memory
Your north star
"It's enough for me."

I'm a stranger
But I am your friend
And I will walk with you
Until the end

I know your heart
I can guess your story
How you were destroyed
And lost all your glory

But even you
Can shine again
I'll take your hand
Just tell me when

Just because you spelt a word wrong
Or maybe said the wrong thing
Maybe someone left, and they wont come back
Be happy for what you have, not what you lack

You never know
How things will change
I just know
They wont be the same

So just a minute
Or maybe an hour
Before tomorrow
And it stings in the shower

You arms are your wings
I want you to fly
You can live and dream
Don't chose to die <3

Xoxo

You did not love me less
You did not start to ignore
You did not look at me with pity
You did not slam the door

You did not swear at me
You did not turn away
You did not close you eyes
You did not make me stay

You held me by the hand
You looked me in the eye
You made me feel the love
And that's what made me cry

I wasn't used to this
Being treated with respect
I did not know what kind was
Now I must reflect

Lover, it is just you and I
Way up here, in the sky
When I look at you
I am not afraid
Of how high we are
If you feel fear, my love
You do not show it
If you are sad darling, cry
They are praying for rain below
And we have found no gods here

We write poems about losing
And then some about loss

We spew out all these words
And never counted the cost

We empty our hollow hearts
Into inked pages and on keys

But the soul we have begun forge
No one, in their right mind ever sees

We dance with pencils and lines to thin
But the bigger picture is unseen

So we must look and search to find
All the things that lay in between

And I Promise

To love you to the ends of the earth
And I promise to save you from all the nightmares
To show you the love in my eyes
To keep you until I die
I will follow your heart
And I will be your blanket
I will protect you from danger
And I will be your savior
I will break all the curses
And I will make your wounds better
I am the key to the lock of the chains that bind you
I will hide you from the demons that seek to find you
To touch your hair
To protect your heart
To walk beside you and match your foot steps
I will be your bridge over troubled water
I will never lie

There is nothing I cant save you from except from myself
I am the only one who could hurt you
And that is why I am leaving
I will go to another world
With my white flag unfurled
Goodbye sweet love I must keep my promise
Goodbye darling you are the only one I will miss

i have a broken heart
dont know where to start

found a place
met your face
stood in line
for a time
dont know how
cant slow down

make it up
make it fall down
love me now
take my heart to town

by my joy ride
my happy place
be the smile
on my face

like in a song
be my muse
make a beat
we will never lose

Seek the sun at the end of its journey
Chase the light past the clouds

The dark is scared it will hide
Will you stay and be the one

It is finished

It is done

Today is the day
We said our goodbyes
You hugged me so hard
I almost started to cry

You will get on that plane
And fly away home
And leave me here
Like a fallen stone

I smiled at you
As best as I could
What I felt inside
Was anything but good

Like a leaf from a tree
The last one to fall
You turned your back
Without another call

You didn't want to
Ever have to part
But our time was
borrowed, from the start

It couldn't be worse
You said you never felt better
But that lie on your lips
Was worth a thousand a letter

I'll write to you
When you are away
And you will read my words
On the next day

And the day after that
You will remember
All the joy we had
In the month of December

So come walk these halls
In the corridors of my mind
Looking through the pieces
And see what you find

Memories with 'X's
Spray painted on
Pieces of poems
And parts of a song

I can picture your smile
But can't see your eyes
Without all the tears
That mask you disguise

You hide from me
All of your thoughts
Tried to be strong
At your own costs

You wanted a fight
I wouldn't give in
So you left me in tears
Neither of us to win

"I'm leaving"
Like a slap to the face
But if you could, you,
Would stay in this place

So I'll wait, for you
With a painted on smile
Because all these days
Made it an hour feel like a mile

Farewell my friend
Have a safe fly
And think of me
When you take the sky

A house poem

Memory etched on a cage of pages
Though storms rise higher
And the ocean rages
And burns like wild fire

Emotions carved into chests of flesh
Open a solid oaken heart
Never let the beat rest
Eons of electricity to make it start

Souls of skies in darkened glass
Fogged beyond recognition
Like trying to drink grass
Is the way my eyes listen

Beyond today's vault
And yesterday's filing cabinet
Lies a raw un-denied fault
By a poet who dreams out of habit

I will die tonight
As I have done before
Still I must remember
To say my prayers
For tomorrow is a new day
Bathed in new light
I could not bear
To tarnish her
With the memory of my sins

light up the walls of my paper thin soul
such that I would burn out
would you be more careful
if my fuse was shorter than it is now

this fuse; she has been blown
out of water and reality alike
many a time, and many a time again
when consent was but a dying lie

and this she calls her dying art
to live each day as if a few had never happened
as if such shadows did not cling to her heels
like every memory was a not a venomous snake

if you bit into her memories
they would not taste like your own
the are unfamiliar in their rendering
and foolish in their aftertaste

the lingering scent of midnight tears
and a thousand scars, each handmade
wrought into her body and the backs of her eyes alike
only some will heal, and only some fade

others, like your own eyes
you forgot they are their
until you turn to the glass
and find only your soul looking back

what could you shut out
if you had a door in your mind
some nights would you lock it
like you lock away me in your life

to stow away like voyagers on a ship
not a care to where it would go
only that it takes you far and it takes you from
all that you have known and that has forced its memory upon you

silent and serpentine these dreams pass
through my shoulders and across my cheeks
into the hollowness of my head
to writhe in agony in a dying light

and still these lights they flicker in the wind
would that you would close the window
but still my soul shivers in anticipation
of the knife to my heart, oh Ceaser's ghost hear me

would you even hear the depth of my scream
as it calls to you in the shadows of my mind
here I hold you, twixt hand and sternum
such that you would ever cling to me

I am but a fool, secure in my own folly
and that which I stand upon is treacherous
the closing of my eyes will not steady my legs
and stamina oh she has abandoned us long ago

I am weak in all but that I have done before
the anxiousness of my bones is a crutch and I crumble
like the walls of a tower without a foundation
and such is this I stand upon

soon I too shall fall into the earth
her waters shall reach me in the end of days
and pull me out, to be one with wind and waves
oh a memory sunk to the abyss

such is this
a candle heart
and a paper thin dream
just enough life
to ignite a soul

burning out
among the stars

This is all that I am
The child I was
Is dead and buried
Why so I hear her
Crying from the grave
My mother never tucked me in
My ghost
Makes her dirt bed every morning
Day Lilies kiss my forehead
A headstone headboard

I should be sleeping

Tell me what it is like
To have a father
One who comes when you call
One who’s voice you recognize
At whisper and not anger
Tell me what it is like
To be sheltered by strong hands
Before you go out into the world
Tell me what it is like
To learn strength from example
And not necessity

I do not know you
Because of who you are
Rather, the parts of you
I see in myself
If they were not so familiar
I would tear them out

I wish you had healed, for yourself
And for me
But there are no shooting stars
No second chances

I am further from you now
It doesn’t not matter
If we are a thousand leagues apart
When under the same roof
I was as inconsequential
Blood and strangers
Father and daughter

Tell me what it is like
To carry a burden
That weighs nothing to you
Tell me what it is like
Not to stumble
Under the shadow
Of your heavy fist

I do not care
If you are proud of me in secret
You do not know me
I do not care to be know

Do you remember when I was little?
I had a nightmare the whole house
Came down around us
It was terribly dark in the rubble
Once.
You comforted me
Once.

I am not dreaming now
The house has come down
Not from the rafters
From the foundation
It was not strong
Not solid
Not able

Tell me what it is like
To pour your anger out
Like water into the cups of children
Tell me what it is like
When you cannot quench their thirst
Tell me you will change
Tell me you are sorry
Tell me you can do better
Tell me I was worth being good for
Every time I counted my pennies
I come up short changed

I would not know
The man who says these things
He is not my father.

When silence is bearable
And when the pin drops

When pain is approachable
And when the day stops

When clouds are dry
And the fall from the sky

When eyes are blind
Only then will I die

The familiarity hurts more than the rest
I remember, but I do not know.
Who was she?
And what has made her whom she is now?
It wasn't what had changed within her, it was how it happened.
Sometimes just a taste is an overdose
Only a fool would ask a bird where it got it's wings
Some things are just so, but this pain
I cannot help but question it
I don't know what to look for, let alone where to find it
I don't have to sleep to dream
Does it have to mean that it is right?

*foolish me

I just love to think of you
Your memory is a spring day

I stare at the sea
It gives it’s loneliness to me
How long has it longed
To touch beyond the shore
To reach what is beyond
I do not know
What is in the deep
I am compelled
It eats away at me
High tide
Ebb and flow
There is no give and take here
Between the rocks and the shoals
We all succumb
To salt water sirens
We love
Because we fear
Give in to her
To the madness of the ocean

Please,

Don't ever tell me to go away

Because I will

And it will hurt like hell

I will miss you ever single **** day

I will want to be right next to you

But I won't be

I can't be

Because you made me think you didn't want me their

Right next to you

Where I belong

The lighting isn't right
For us to fall in love
Sit with me in the darkness
Wait with me
For stars to come

I don't know what love is anymore
But I do know it hurts