"manipulatively" poems
your sun burns my skin
pale
hungry
entering the void you manipulatively created
worrisome
the trench pulls hard on my weeping benevolence
i loathe the intricate memory
the impeding wonder
the vagrant, pulsing fear
eyes wide open and breathing in
tangling
misunderstood and tumultuous
once again, pale
or is it empty?
digging quickly in search of the homestead
previous paths erased
replaced
upon which my sun sets and moon glows
taken
her eyes illuminate
deep red
surging
and searching
helplessly obedient
turning pages as if the gods proclaimed the duty
once true obligatory flames
now a pitter patter
rain
drenching
lies
Oct 7, 2012
Oct 7, 2012 at 7:25 PM UTC
My eyes formed steps that followed and fled
round the bend of failed yesterdays,
stuck in the gullet of unswallowed breath
I could not read painful pages, I turned them
over, leafing my way through misguidance,
judgement had borrowed me for may years
Guilt spun grey thread, caught hold and wrapped
manipulatively, indecisive nature grew to self destruct
the analytical marching song chose the day
Sleep shades the burning sun from breaking
flesh, seeks out to rebuild the view from my eyes
the curtains drawn held me in shadowy shawls
where rest found energy to stand in line for
tomorrows envelopes to drop on the mat before
me, would I dare to open, release the sealed contents
The secrets held in calm times, released in raged rage
hurled with force, reclaiming head of the table, yet....
never to be spoken aloud...... for fear attaches itself
Jan 21, 2014
Jan 21, 2014 at 8:35 AM UTC
Arrogance, high-pitched laughter,
hiding behind some old fashioned
movie smile knowing you're a fraud
yet pausing and waiting for people to applaud.
Manipulatively working your pawns
for comfort, for egoistic measures,
abusively, but too easy to stop.
You're an actor, live performer,
liar and a former sizzling fire.
It's tempting and intriguing, it's deceit,
how you mistreat your minions,
unethical and wrong and you are aware
your mind's wellfare is based on other's opinions.
Feb 17, 2017
Feb 17, 2017 at 4:24 PM UTC
I've only known you
for about as long as
it will take me
to finish this second
cup of coffee
and cigarette number four.
Only four and
it's already sunrise!
This is the start
of something new, yet
I can't help but wonder
if I will twist you
the way I broke
the thermostat
manipulatively
out of curiosity
(I only wanted to see
how high the heat would go!)
or worse yet,
if you will drop me
clumsily like you did
your precious wooden clarinet,
exhausted
from your hours of
playing.
I don't know you,
and you certainly
do not know me.
You see the mannequin
I dress up and put
on display, but he
does not speak of the ******
in my nightstand, the erotica
on my hard drive,
these scribbles of cynicism.
Of course,
I'll continue to think
of you, ideally
as much as you'll think
of me,
and we'll invent fun facts
about one another for
sharing with our friends 'round
the bonfire before our bitter
truths reveal themselves
like 17-year cicadas
digging their way to
freedom
and we'll try not to
be too disappointed like
the tired waitress
for whom I left a dollar
(with my number on it)
or a lousy poem
bestowed with breath,
cruelly made self-aware.
Aug 27, 2015
Aug 27, 2015 at 12:43 PM UTC
I have loved him the most I’ve loved anyone
daringly
unreasonably
carefully
softly
I’ve loved him like the colors you can’t see
I want him so much
but I hate his guts
He’s tried to make a soft girl out of a mad girl
I’ve hated him the most I’ve hated anyone
Wildly
Savagely
Harshly
Manipulatively
Jan 23, 2016
Jan 23, 2016 at 2:47 PM UTC
This world
This land
This place
This home
This the reason to explore
To experience
This day
This week
This year
Keeping me trapped
A prisoner to negative prosperity
My smile
My laughter
My optimism
Scarred
Scorched
Abused by scepticism
Life through the bottom of an endless glass
Life through a haze , a green crumbling daze
Life of pestilence, of fears and fevers
Life intravenous
The dream, dissipated
Reality on a screen,
Manipulatively encapsulated
The patience, the resilience,
Exhausted, exasperated
Today
This hour
This minute
This second
The troubles, the trials,
The injustice of humanity,
It all could be
So easily terminated
Aug 9, 2016
Aug 9, 2016 at 12:05 PM UTC
whispering words of wisdom, let it be.
let it go, free your hands from your mangled heart, let it heal. in all kindness to yourself, don't go back. you held your breath, even if it hurts to breath again,
it's time to breathe again. lying on the floor in a mess of hungover emotions, so strong you tremble at the mercy of your thoughts. at any moment it could all hit you, you would fall apart in front of all these people you have carefully, manipulatively fed lies of okay-ness. what if it crumbles you? stand back up, because I swear to god if there was one universal truth that I could convince everyone of, it would be, "there is no shame in the truth of emotion." so why am I holding all my feelings and truths like ***** weights? if I believed for myself the things I believe for others, if I just allowed myself to feel the way I accept others do, would I be so messed up? boxed up? maybe if it were for these words, I would explode.
maybe if I went back, changed how I withheld, changed how I gave up, maybe
Oh god
maybe...
Mar 5, 2015
Mar 5, 2015 at 2:04 AM UTC