The prophetic use of Dr. Seuss
made it clear to Joshy
that he will face the world with joy
and return to tell his story.

His mountains will be oh so high
his mountains will be marvelous
Joshy will enjoy the climb
and Joshy will be fearless.

Sometime later, late at night
when children should be sleeping
Joshy will then tell his tale
but his brothers won't believe him.

Joshy will then smile and grin
and tell them they're just daft
if they just can't believe his tale
he'll not tell the stranger half.

Spending the last day with Maegan Finn,*
who, turns out, prefers to be called Mae

11:35 p.m.

I burn the popcorn. Just the pieces against the bag's underbelly.
Like a nightclub bouncer, I decide which pieces to let inside
a white, ancient bowl. One, on which, a former roommate scrawled
"THIS MACHINE KILLS MUNCHIES" upon its side in red, permanent ink.
I never said the night would be

perfect. But when I walk into my bedroom carrying the snack fiasco,
I know Ms. Maegan Finn doesn't mind. Something between her vine-framed,
honey irises and my gaze, some mischievous energy, causes her to lower
her head. She allows a smile. She's sitting on my twin-sized bed. Her back to a pillow
to the

wall. An empty pillow beside her waits for me. With one hand she moves her hot chocolate
to the side, with the other she lifts my calico comforter for me to climb under. I never
said the night would be

perfect. But I know Ms. Maegan Finn doesn't mind. Because when I say, "I'm sorry. I didn't really plan for this," nervous laugh, "this is the worst final meal of all-time. You can leave if you want.
You don't have to go down with the ship."

She responds, "I don't mind," raises an eyebrow as she reads the bowl. Dismisses it. And grabs a handful of popcorn. On the television, a white-haired man with heavy jowls and tree bark wrinkles begins to talk.

...planet Earth will be recycled. The universe recycled.

"So, when does this guy think the world will end?" I ask.

"Midnight."

"Chris said two."

"Two p.m.? Like today? Like already past?"

"Yeah."

Maegan shakes her head,"Stupid *******."

11:40 p.m.

"So, if I hadn't botched dinner, what would you have chosen for your last meal?"

"Well, Joshy-poo, I'd have to say popcorn and hot chocolate."

"Seriously."

"It's salty. It's sweet. The temperatures compliment each other.
It shouldn't work, but it does. If the world wasn't ending,
I'd suggest you open a restaurant."

"C'mon. What would your last meal be?"

...with friends. Cling to your loved ones as the final minutes pass by.
The world becomes perfect. The calendar pages turn no...

"Do you remember Waffle Crisp?" she breaks gently.

"You've got to be kidding me."

"Hold on."

"Any meal on the planet. Anything! And you choose-"

"Waffle Crisp."

"Oh, that terrible commercial with the grannies in disguise."

"Grannies and all," staring at the reflective surface of the hot chocolate,
she begins talking in distant pieces like reading off a teleprompter,
"Waffle            Crisp            reminds

me           of           my

              dad."

"I see."

A commercial is on for ******. I never said the night would be

perfect.

...picking the right moment is easy with...

"Why do you think of your dad?"

Maegan releases a deep exhale/tension-laugh.

"I don't know. I mean, I

guess it's because every morning -- well, before my parents got divorced --
he'd come down the stairs, mess up my hair -- God, I'd get so mad --, and
he'd say,
'Mae, may the world learn from your perfection today.'
He'd kiss my forehead. I'd eat Waffle Crisp. I remember the smell -- the shapes."

11:51 p.m.

...less than ten minutes. Go outside with your families
look to the

heavens...

"How's the world supposed to end? Has he said?" Maegan asks.

With a finger raised, I finish chewing my popcorn.

"The planets are aligning right?"

"Yeah, I've heard that. I've heard the Mayans just
ended their calendars on the

date. But I don't know how either of those scenarios make the world end, though."

"Exploding sun?"

"Maybe an asteroid?"

"Could be," I say.

Ms. Maegan Finn rests her head on my shoulder. "You should ask another question."

"Um, okay."

...Security Systems. Are your children safe?

"I got one," I grab the remote and turn down the television. "What is something you haven't told

anyone? One secret that otherwise would die with you."

"I hate the name Maegan."

"Why?"

"It's a terrible name."

"Is not."

"It is too. First off, not only did my parents indulge the cruelty of switching the 'a' and 'e',

but

then they went ahead and gave me the most common girl's name on the planet.
I don't stand out until I say, 'Excuse me, you misspelled my name.' It's not funny.
Hell, even when I say that, their usual response is, 'No, I didn't misspell your name.'
Because they'd know."  Flustered, Maegan puts the white, ancient bowl of popcorn on the ground. "And get this away from me."

"What would you rather be called?"

"Mae. Just Mae. I always liked it."

"Alright, Ms. Mae."

...hoisted unto judgement. Some without absolution...

"What about you, Mr. Josh? What's your secret?"

I take a sip of hot chocolate. I look at the bare wall behind the television, and wish I had
decorated it, but I

never did. The paintings are even in my closet. They just need to be put up.

"I love you."

"What?"

"I love you, Mae."

Mae smiles wide. Puts her hand on my shoulder, "Your'e joking right?"

"Nope."

"That's a bold secret to tell," she laughs.

"Not the reaction I was expecting."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's just -- what happens tomorrow? When I have to see you again."

"I'm betting on the exploding sun."

"Or the asteroid."

"Or the asteroid."

11:59 p.m.

...a matter of seconds until we are cast like dice into the blackness of...

Mae takes my hot chocolate. Places the porcelain cups on the carpeted floor. With a "c'mere" she peels me off the pillow, off the wall. Moves the pillow to the head of the bed. She guides my body until I'm lying down. Straddling me, she leans down. Traces my shoulder blades, then softly latches on to them. She leans further.

...9, 8, 7...*

A kiss.

A long kiss. The weight transfers from my body into her, then is carried toward the ceiling by some mischievous energy. At the end of the world, Ms. Mae Finn kisses me. Kisses me despite popcorn. Despite hot chocolate. Despite love confessed too soon. Just when I never want that minute to end, it




ends.



12:00 a.m.
          
               But a new minute begins.

"That was perfect," Mae says.

I was going through old facebook messages deleting ones that didn't seem like they had a purpose anymore. I found three threads from dead friends. One died in a car crash, she was seventeen. Last thing she said to me was "I'll see you later Joshy-Poo!" and she gave me a hug. She died the next day. Another friend killed himself. Last thing I talked with him about was the good reference I would give him for a job since I was his manager. He blew his head off a couple months back. Now their ghosts are still on my wall. Messages forever stamped in a way. An inbox that will never be checked.
Other messages I went over were just people or untitled "users" that never messaged back or I the other way around because I didn't want them in my thoughts anymore. But still these words remained... until I deleted them.
We all push forward my dear, but entropy increases. It always increases...

I see the shadows in the darkest of the nights. The times when nothing else is showing up. I slowly walk toward the end of the tunnel where there is barely even a shimmer of light. It’s so dark that no one would expect that someone would be out at this dark of a night. The streams are flowing with ease through the dark abyss. The sound of the owls hooting is what is calming my senses just by a little bit. I can tell there are other presences out, but can’t figure out where they are hiding in the shadows. I seek out to try to find at least one of the presences. I’m walking along the places that I know all too well. I can never stop wondering these little secret passageways at night, especially when it is this dark everywhere. I here silent little whispers of the little children talking to their parents that are actually dead. I never felt like they knew what they really looked like. The way these kids described their parents was the saddest thing in the world. They described them as evil beings of the night and how much they wish they would just talk to them. The funny thing is that I wish someone would come out and just talk to me for a change. I call out to the little voices, but all they do is go completely silent. It truly hurts when none of them will ever talk to me back. I just wish they could come out. I hate the fact that they are all alone in the dark. At times, I just feel like I have voices in my head. I feel like I am going completely crazy and just don’t know how to fix it anymore. I take my place in the dark abyss and just start to drift off to sleep, when a little hand taps on my shoulder. I jump up startled and look at her in awe. She slightly smiles and patiently waits for me. I smile really big at her and ask what her name is. She said it was, “Olivia.” Then, all of a sudden, I hear a man’s voice behind me. I turn and see a guy no older than 18 looking straight at the little girl. His eyes move to me and his face lights up in surprise.  I look him in the eyes and smile extremely big.
I say, “Hi.”
“Hello, my name is Joshua,” He said.
“My name is Athena,” I said.
His smile widens and I can’t help, but smile back. I look away from him because I am not use to having people come out and talk to me.
“Joshy, can we keep her?” Olivia asks excited.
“Via, she is her own person, we can’t just take her and not let her go,” Joshua says.
She begins to cry and my heart breaks to see her this sad. I walk up and hug her tightly.
“It will be okay.” I say, “I’m not going to disappear.”
She finally stops crying and I’m able to let her go. Joshua looks at me and says, “thanks.”
“It wasn’t a problem. I’m finally glad someone came out to talk to me.” I say in a slight whisper.
After such a long time of feeling completely alone, I have someone here to talk to. It is a strange, but good feeling. Joshua looked at me as though he was trying to read my thoughts. Thank goodness he couldn’t. That would be a very bad problem. It would reveal way too much about me to anyone. I am not what I seem and I plan to keep everyone out of those little secrets of mine, so that no one will ever get hurt again. I can’t do that to another person.
“I have to go.” I say sadly.
“Can we see each other tomorrow?” Olivia asks me with puppy dog eyes beaming into my soul.
“I’m not sure.” I say, “Ask Joshua and see what he thinks.”
“Joshy, pleaseeeeee. Please, let us see her again tomorrow.” Says Olivia.
“Okay, but only if you be a good little sister and not be bad tonight.” Says Joshua.
She exclaimed, “YAYYYYY!”
I tell them goodbye and head off through the darkness, not knowing what to expect for tomorrow. I sign in grief and relief. I just know that I can not get close to these people, if I do then it will be trouble. Yes, I totally agree that Joshua is cute and the his sister is amazing. I just don’t want to get close to them because I am scared to. I don’t want to lose another person and I can’t hurt anymore people. I make it to my street and walk to my house. I walk inside and it is the same as always. I take a shower and go to bed. I’m not hungry, so I don’t even bother looking for food. I wake up screaming from how bad of a nightmare I had. I jump up and can’t go back to sleep.