The shoreline bites at the toes of attendees,
watching the little appendages curl up together.
The footprints there have been etched into fossils,
the sand crunching together and sounding like
echoes of war cries and whispered endearments.

The raft is loaded. The time is traced.
A caterpillar in a chrysalis hums a love song,
glows with the light of ‘vita vita vita’ as
the gathering crowds taste dead languages.
Children eat from lunch boxes carved with runes.

Sometimes a glipse of twenty years is caught,
a journal is forced open by the wind; it’s pages
creak, the voices from the world's coffins
that have been wrenched open start a hymn
and the songs pile up in our ears as dust.

Those who are do not mourn titter respectfully
as men in white coats try to push the raft
into the water, but you were so lovably stubborn.
You always returned and even here you knew it;
your final laugh was filtered through sign language.

I step forward and push, float you off into
the water, put my fingers over the candle and
over the lips of dead kings as masses shoot the sky.
The match roars and your raft gasps as it burns,
old things being laid to rest and new ones kindling.

My best friend who I think about constantly.
My best friend who I wished to be apart of me.
My best friend who I wish and pray, To have her one day ,safe so I can see her smiles brighter then they are today.
My best friend whos pain kills me too.
My best friend who is the red to my blue.
My best friend theres no one like you,
Im stuck on you like glue,
part we might at times but Itll never end or be thru.
Cause My best friend, you are true.
My best friend, you are real.
I love my best friend, more of a man I will ever be,
bend as you might you the world will never break a woman of steel
My best friend my fortune and wealth , my queen for you i kneel.
On the foreal
Im happy phareel
My best friend, I only wish the best for you.
My bestfriend I only want you to be comfortable.
My bestfriend when I hear you cry I die inside how could any guy hurt such a free spirited butterfly.
**** got me ****** up in many ways
Wanna **** this ***** up payback is a bill the ***** didnt pay. And im all about gettin paid.
Pssh one way..
Back to a soft spot like your cheeks
My best friend I love you with all my might and will,
Your my everything,
there no other who can take your place,
not now nor ever
will there be anybody better,
never will and still till
this day , as ghost as ive become,
such a son of a gun, I **** back and fired
I dont give a ***** at everyone,
I am sorry to ever fired at you.
My boo My true friend real ***** to the end.
MY BEST FRIEND.
YOU ARE WHAT I LOOK FOR IN EVERYONE.
BUT YOU ARE THE ONLY TO EVER HAVE IT.
The chemistry that cooks and sizzle great friendships, we have it...
GREAT CONVOS AND TRUST?
between us its now a habbit.
Laughter? We made it an addiction, theres no1 like you me without life and time lacks conviction,

Its gunna get better
I will never leave
I will never retreat
When you need me
Im there believe me
Im that shadow that hugs the light to your smile
No1 else can see me.
Im the voice that hugs your opinion,
 Never wanna see you down
Never frown
Just hope in the day ill be blessed to still be around,
Everytime i look at you I thank God and nature
How could there make such a woman
So much love your signatures kisses papers.
Your "laters" are an eternity, but as soon as you show im rollin deep
Like the **** your that good thc
That sticky that breaks
Easily
Your indica sendin me to the sky high
With litterature  of your ways
Your butterfly that never had a beginning stage
You was born that way
Back in the day when your daddy made that right choice,
And your mother wow!  But you amazing.
Never phasin the problems
You always there facin them
Head on, trapt cause your headstrong
My bestfriends theres untold reasons why we get along.
Maybe your kryptonite livin three doors downs,
But i still remain strong whenver  you around,
The world stops
Cause your revolving now,
Center of my attention,
Love to hear you speak,
The way nose jiggle when you mad at me yellin,
Haha i cant be mad, you make me smile , like the sayin you got in the bag.... glad
What else i like? Rememer this a prototype,
Only shedding a glipse thoughts in my afternights.



By Deep Thought
aka Linguist Musician Aka
Emmanuel JV Hernandez

Although you see me now

You're looking straight through

Although your eyes may glipse

You know nothing of what would seem too new for you



Although I smile when you walk past

You know not of me praying not to cry

Although you may hear my laugh

You are blind of the real me hiding inside



Although you may hug me tight

You may think that you know me to size

All you are really seeing is a mask

You simiply see my heart-strung emotions in a clever disguise



The mask I wear is firm to it's place

You never being allowed to really see my face

And every night when I hang the mask up

I let the tears freely fall, as my palms fill like a cup



I dream of one day when you can see me and

I can finally lift my mask, my daily disguise.

Lying under the surface of the wake
Toss and turn and horror  break
Grasping image minds mistake
Although you walk around and act
Doing all whats needed track
Looking through a clear blue mist
Forgotten days the closed kiss
Cannot wake from the drowning reverie
Only glipse your hope of being free

there was a time when i was suddenly just here
my heart and mind recall another time, before this
hence the first battle of this life, surging back and forth
sorrow my companion for reasons unknown to me
yet none the less held for i knew i was strong enough to hold such a burden

i sit besides you and show you that your sorrow is not unjust, mere miss understood
i watched my beloved grow, ever so watchful and ever so with a smile
this man knew nothing of his fate nor of me........ and at times this was not the best feeling
yet i know how things work and aided him still
for our desitnies are linked at the end

then a time came where i was awake and my eyes were laid upon a beautiful being
she gave me a gift, the gift to defend those i care for a gift, i will use for her if need be
a glipse of her face reduced me to tears, for reasons only of late have i found and treasure
together we have been since and always even if i have been too blind to see
it was her job to remind me whom i am for it is her i picked

now he sees me and in times his wings have grown back
how i am so proud his heart does not carry the sound of metal a promise i asked of him
together we hug with our wings, in such am embrace we treasure
it is my eye that i cover to be strong for i know more than him and know my duties
yet those feelings yearn to be recalled and refelt

now i am a warrior i fight for the light, this is my choice
the will of a hybrid torn between evil and good, the true free makers of their destiny
for their will alone desides upon what side of the field they stand
i remember a being so gentle and kind who smiled upon me and showed me the....... light
how my heart became of the light thus far

after much training he is now ready for his final destiny if his heart lets it be
i softly touch him and speak gentle words, reminding.......... caring....... and.. loving
for together we dive into the chaos of battle and once again we will find ourselves at the end of it
when only the sorrow can be heard and felt and upon this your final wish i shall grant
we shall gaze upon the sun rise as we have done before and we shall do so again

my resolve absoulte! nothing can break me
as i surge to the light and push forward i feel it..... what is this?
love? i carry love upon my heart yet.. it was always their but how i ponder?
then my gaze falls upon her... no this cannot, then she lifts my head up and speaks you feel what i feel
all is how it should be

and upon this we smile together, we fight as warriors and love as lovers
this in a sence is our curse but our way of life our existance
for together....... we are the tide of battle

You said her voice was like nails on a chalkboard you say mine is mommas lullabies and until the shrieking shattered glass cries you said you never knew I could sound like a familiar pain. I show you how its tacked to my shadow, say how a stay in the dark wont offer me escape. You said her cries echoed wolf to a choir and when the preaching drowned you out like school hall lectures you found yourself waiting for the bell to ring. You said her touch was like a doctor checkup and mine was family reunion hugs each time we met but I warned you I wanted to be the footprints in the sand before the tide takes me along cause I know she was searching your smile for a glipse of forever but I've been so hooked on your now that I'm hoping the future finds reason to wait. You said the shards of your heart she trailed you along have turned to lillypads in my presence and I tell you I know you must walk on water because I'd never believed in such holiness before, you say you only wish to make me feel full in no higher a power than the moment to make, I tell him to feed me freeverse compliments at no stakes cause the past cant catch us in its wake and we won't plot a plan for fate's fingers to break cause all I want is my now in a kiss I will take

I saw him just by a glipse,
And the way his eyes blinks.
Im now down here waiting,
But my heart still aching.

He is my apollo,
For he is poetry to my ears,
He is my picasso,
For he is art to my eyes.

Love is seen not by the eyes,
But by the heart that was once cold as ice.
Though not worthy of thine,
You’ve made me from water to wine.

Mom,
you taught me
taught me by example.

To be your honest and most authentic self.
Which made it hard for me to be myself.
I didn't know who I was anyway.
But now I see you are holding yourself back for me,
holding back the questions that must be killing you,
to ask,
"Are you okay, is my child happy?"
The fears of getting left (again), of being unworthy of love.
The fear you inherited, as did I.
Did you fail everyone?
Are you here with me listening, or is your head back in your mothers kitchen?
You have to fight for every word from me.

You taught me to hone my perception, to watch, to listen, to learn
To appreciate living life which always seemed the most beautiful to you,
no matter your circumstances.
You saw things in the sun, the flowers and the birds,
the way clouds shape forms and the wind dances in the trees.
Life was always worth living to you, without question.

So now I notice the tears in your eyes everytime we meet.
I notice how you dress up prettier than to any date you ever went to in the past, just for me.
That you wear the little black bracelet I gifted you to your birthday on a wimp, picked up fom a market stand, passing by ages ago.
It doesn't really go with much,

I notice that you have to swallow your pride and
practically beg for my time, a glipse of my life
chase me, drive me into a corner so I can't evade you
Just so I can keep mine.
It hurts me too to see.

I can't give you what you want,
You hurt me growing up, helped mess me up,
triyng to help
I've always been lonely, always alone, isolation became comfort.
I needed a mother. Someone to take care of me, guide me, force me.
Yes, fight me cause I was the enemey. And I was fierce.
But you couldn't. You were still looking for answers yourself.

I couldn't wait for you to finally find them.
I had to go on, go through without you, build my own stability.
So I build many walls brick on brick, and I stacked high.
Even more between us, thicker than blood.
Because a mothers word is like a sledge hammer.
It breaks through wether you like it or not.
Always hits home, my neglected, angry, lost, little heart.
The world always seemed to much for me.

Yesterday a friend held me and didn't let go, let me escape,
Another let me rest in her lap and went through my hair.
The last time I had that and accepted it...
I can't remember
It's already hard to allow myself peace, worse even love,
but almost impossible to ask for it.

I'm slowly healing now, dancing through streets,
singing along to music so the neighbours can hear
Being my most authentic self without any forcing or faking.
Bringing out my innocent, cheeky childlike side to the light.
A honest smile without hiding the sadness in my eyes.
Trying to be brave to try and evantually fail again.
To walk the world and not look down, nor avert my gaze,
run and hide away.

I'm meeting people who support me, encourage me, push me.
Ther are so few of them, who care.
Maybe to few.
I'm still not very good at it. But it's getting better.

Opening up would still mean breaking my heart and yours too
it would mean hurting you, bringing you to tears again.
I don't want that.
You've been hurt enough, I've hurt you enough.

I can't take care of you. I can hardly do so for myself.
I'm still unable to cry for myself. Even when I try to push it.
I don't think things will ever be okay. I don't think we will ever have a family. That's not brokem.
But that's okay.

Honestly I don't think I really want to be fine.
I don't want to be fixed.
It's a part of me. This is me.
It has been for such a long time, I wouldn't know what to do without it.
It is my strenght and my weakness, my anchor and the strom.
My cage that I'm trapped in. Locked from the inside.
It feels safer here. I get to be in control for the most part.

I'm sorry mom,
I'm trying.
But some things can't be undone. Some things stay broken.
It's in the cracks where I  can find the most beauty in life.