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awkward Sam Aug 2013
I tagged along with you today
trying to be useful
helpful
to be there for you
nurse you..comfort you..clean your wounds
go with to the doctor
help to call your work..make us black tea
help you take a ***..bring a hot bottle
and painkillers to ease your pain
lift you on the pillows..straighten your bedclothes
try make you comfy

try to arrange a van
then you shut me up
when I try to speak
just to make a suggestion
of help
why, I don't know

then you mention that
if we had break
from each other
who would you have turned to
in your hour of need
this is all I am to you

now you push me into a corner
tease with a cruel joke
all at my expense
I ask you: don't repeat
and yet you taunt
that you will not be shut up
and you repeat the cruel joke
knowing how hard it is
for me

you know something?
when I nursed your wounds this morning
I took care not to hurt you
let it sting too much
despite the medic's words
of aggressive treatment

you did not take that same care
just now
you touch an old wound
you know it hurts
and yet
you persist in taunting
and pulling off an ugly effort

thanks so much
for fuckall!

:(

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A SHOCK I ALSO GOT!!!!!!

******* for hurtin me so
your deliberate taunts hurt
more than you know



and who is still here?
me.
vf Jul 2015
Every day that we don't speak
brings me closer to knife-shiny clarity...
the kind of voice in my head
that motivational speakers
tell you not to listen to!
i've messaged you (x 4)
and you've left me fuckall.
You've left me, *******.
I need money, I need money, I need love. I
need something more than
Euros transferred into dollars, I need
compassion and some sense of stability
and a trust that only comes from a
voicemail waiting for me as I wake up.
i know the time difference is ... a difference,
and there's been a whole lot of time
I've had for my thoughts to fill me up
like a black water bathtub.
what made you stop caring
Deanna Jul 2015
the moon had flesh, but i tore it away
(exposure exposure)
curiosity got the best of me i wanted to know
if what i was dreaming about truly was something remarkable

(i was wrong)

the moon was a vessel full of nothingness
a reflection of my heart,
a destination of my soul

learning desolation and craving the form of a black hole,
my entire presence on this fuckall called earth is no longer
tangible

i am nothing

we are all,
nothing

flesh and sadness walking this earth with a purpose that no one's truly been able to find

none of us are anything

except for temporary shreds of sanity
that rot after a little while
We all hover
at the edge of
an abyss
of our own
making

A bit
hyperbolic
that

Certainly we
should allow room
for happenstance
in the
manifestation

But surely
our own doings
comings and goings
thisings and thatings
and raw
human
fuckallings
help shape
the void

Tinge the darkness
ever raven

Don't call me
Shirley
my mind bellows

That

That likely
accounts for
much of
my problem
Yenson Mar 2020
The gangsters of Crimson
tell us please about this Doubts malarkey
oh you Guvnor of the Eat End Mob

ye Gotcha, come listen..matey

we ain't Crooks, Con-artists and Extortioners for nothing
we are smart cookies, been in this game all our lives
listen matey, hear me
know what we said, slander is the main leveler
That patsy we have the contract on
the man is as straight as dye
innocent as the day is born
never did a thing wrong, no dirt did we find on him
decent nice upright upstanding fellow
as nice as apple pie and iced cream

But he had the gull to diss our trade
yes we are thieves and crooks and all time rotters
but he said he would expose us after we robbed the ******
others don't say ****, just claim insurance and shut their gob
but not this sunshine, the ****** called us out
he din't pay protection money
then moaned when we rob him blind, now he gets the treatment
don't mess with the Guvnor ye Mr Righteous

We have ways, first thing is to discredit the ******
its Character assassination, public humiliation, we ruin his life
so we slandered him from here to Timbuktu or where the darkies are
we told high tales and hyped the hell outta that patsy
you know how good the ******* are in spreading malicious gossips
we paid their leaders and sent them all out
wow! did they do a good job or what. it went down a treat
the punters swallowed every word, every defamation stuck like glue
even his mother would find it hard to love him
hahaha...think he could stand up to us

after all that malarkey and mud throwing
we now have to stalk and hound the ****** and make him loose his mind
Now listen here, you just can't go to the stupid punters
and say, hound that man, they ain't that stupid
so you give em a good story, nice fake news in juicy wrapper
you create a false scenario, nice word eh, got that from the TV
anyways, you sell the dopes some fake scenario
then tell them you are controlling the mud splatter royal star
tell the dopes anytime they see him they must do this or that
you get the demoralising mob trolls to write dirges and *******
till the day is long, tell them they are putting doubts in his mind
planting seeds to haze, hanker and give the ****** grieve
cause they are confusing him, as well as invalidating the c--t

You see bozos, what we are doing is relentlessly mobbing him
getting at him, snipping and chipping away, wearing him down
make him feel the whole world is against him
leave him isolated, friendless, hounded and helpless
we must make him **** himself for he is a non-criminal grass
and that's how we sort those goodie two shoes out
we poison their world till they poison themselves
we use the punters to drive him insane

Ah, clever or what, who says crooks and villains aren't clever
we are manipulating the stupid masses and they are eating outta our hands
we make them believe false scenario, get the numpties to do silliness
watch how they go for it, all convinced they are doing solidarity
listen my son, the only education you need is no ******* university
come learn from us, the people or punters, call em what you will
are as dumb and brainless as jellied eels
You steal their brains and their stupid minds
an tell them you are teaching them how to **** royal mind
they can't wait to cast 'doubts' on fuckall nothing doing

We know the game, we know the punters
that poor patsy hasn't got a chance
I tell you what though
this contract is the hardest we've ever done
we've put this ****** through the mill for yonks
given the whole nine yards and more to push him over the edge
Yet, the ******* still stands, laugh and even talk back
******* heck, this man must be an alien.......
Yenson Feb 2022
there was neon at the office do
there was wine and cakes ambushed proceedings
                                the management was there and
needed no neon to see to see for real
neon is dim and dull
              and for the red-light districts and underground dives
where nonsense and fuckall are now locked down
                         for the down and outs
who know nada about rock'n'roll

elsewhere headboy is supping bottle beer
                   after a works meeting he says
the blues are cracking 2020 Mouton Rothschild,
                 and hors d'oeuvres from Fortnum & Mason
while a poor old lady is missing her dear dead husband
                                 and counting unspent millions at Coutts & Co

the peasants are mad on full or half pay
                                  getting drunk and fighting their partners
moving from Golders Green to coastal towns in their dreams
            neon flicker dim and dull
momentum at a standstill
          they are working in the garden as one does
someone has made another baby
covid does not affect blue *****
the blues can see proper and do it proper
                 no neon required
leave that to the underground and the strange cargoes
here's a gin and tonic
If it's true
then work
is the best way
out of poverty
for you,

but they'd tell that
to anyone
who was on
the breadline

I got no time
to waste on
soundbites
from those
fuckall governments

I'm signing on
and at the same time
signing out
of the system.

— The End —