Arm gooin' daàn me muvva's
An arm gonna goo by buz
Cos me feet am bloomin' urtin'
An I aint got me an oss

Then arm off to ave some bevvies
An arm gonna get kaylied
If yow'm in the Jolly Nailor
Then arl shaàt ya one inside

Doh goo bein' a soft apeth
Doh goo doin' owt thats daft
Cos when yow'v dun ad' a skinful
Then yow know yow just get saft

If ar doh see yow befow'r yow goo
Arl see yow on anon
Cos arm kippin' on the sofa
Raànd me mums aàs back up um

**** about face, I seem to get things,
Always putting my foot in my mouth.
I’m do-lally tap as me mum always says.
A great big apeth, just like my dad.

But you my dear, help me think clear
you’re the only thing seemingly right.
I may be a wally, I may be a ***
But I want to dance with you tonight.