everyday is a saddening bore,
every fiber of my being knows
i could have been, should have been something more.

mice crawl through the vines
that intertwine through the depths
of my darkened mind.

i should have been a pair
of ragged claws, scuttling across the
floors of silent seas.

i should have been falling down
twelve stories silently, beautifully,
tragically, not making a sound.

i should have been sinking
with rocks tied to my heart and ankles,
so maybe i could stop thinking.

instead, i countinue to breathe.


but sometimes I still think of ropes
swinging in the midnight breeze
when i look at the trees.
(cjw)

She smells like marmalade
and Christmas trees.
She cuts her heart
where she places her knees.
She smokes in the park,
under the skating skies.
She makes me upset
and sometimes I make her cry.

Over in the dark,
she plays in the snow.
And if she feels cold,
I touch her chest
but I don't know.

Bask in the bark:
our names on a tree.
Carved with the knife
that she swung at me.

She says she's drowning in my ocean,
but I feel no emotion.

Her words suggest our bond
is as strong as a noose.
But she only loved me
when I was something to lose.

You think you're a lost cause
but you're just stuck in the middle.
Life's been hard since you were little.
I don't know every thing,
but I know it's getting warm outside
and you're going to be fine.

You think you're a cancer
but just wait and see
that you'll heal yourself,
like you helped heal me.
This may sound cliché,
but it's getting warm outside  
and you're going to be fine.

you painted a beautiful sunset,
full of color and life,
and said it represented me.

you said i was art.

three months later,
you poured black over the canvas



(cjw)