How is it
that a boy so cute
adorable and sweet
flirty and fun
be a player?
Why is it that
i kiss him and he kisses back
but only in a bathroom stall
What can i do to deserve him through all?
never sharing, but truly caring
him and me
I do know it won't happen
a player in his ways through and through
but maybe as he kisses me
he will feel something real?
No i know but still i ask
How, why, what
a boy so cute
who i could dream actually would like me
instead however he just wants my body

Beep Beep Beep
Alarm clock I think
reach out to turn it off
can’t move or even breathe
open eyes, way too bright
Needles in my skin
wonder what they are bringing in
no alarm just heart monitor
mom crying by me
did someone die?
i try to speak
tube in throat restricting me
but yet I try to breathe
glances over at me yells
flinch is all I can do
doc remove the tube
internal pleas coming out of me
however so silently
here we go I think as I fall back asleep
eyes wide open
brain fuzzy
mom no longer besides me
hello I croak
hello a voice calls
your safe now
she smiles so kind
sure maybe I reply
tough rough go I’ve had she explains
starving girls get that way
food is pumping into me I now get as she explains
i cry
no more thin body comments
so long boy who dated me for my thinness
goodbye gymnastics who caressed the thin so dear
all must welcome the fat back or leave my sweets
but if they go at least I won’t be leaving to